Diane Jakacki
Edited Text
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will learn sho

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Robin Michals Sabra Moore Faith Wilding

Ann Sperry Rose Weil

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Fr

Heresies 25
Clarissa T. Sligh

Kindergarten Class—
Graduation 1970

È

Alice Shapiro

The Art of Education

Janet Vicario

Blind History

Mira Schor

On Failure & Anonymity

Judith K. Brodsky

w N A u

Nancy Wells
E.A. Racette

Donna Evans

Tomie Arai
Sara Pasti

Women, Art, and

53

Lucy R. Lippard

Aesthetic Questions

53

Ruth Bass and

54

Eva Grudin

Tracy

Cross-Cultural Issues

Marsha Cummins

Why do they
crave the experience?

9

51

53

Women’s Wheel

The Spinning of the Top

10

Untitled

10

The Wonderful

African America: Images,
Ideas and Realities

New York City School

Judy Malloy
Nikki Herbst

11

12

No Potato Chips

Lynne Cohen

13

Classroom

Cricket Potash

14

Seize the Time

Joni Sternbach

14

From the Cameo series

Marie Cartier

17

Poem: A Manual for Survival

17

Elementary School Class

the Drop Ins
Carolien Stikker

How to Make

Carolien Stikker

18

Country Window/Broken

Other Nature

Rap Sheet

People of Color at

Carolien Stikker

Barbara A. St. John

58

Hannah Wilke

60

Victoria Garton

60

Pamela Shoemaker

They Lied

Denise Tuggle

63

Carolien Stikker

66

Sheila Pinkel

66

Valerie Sivilli

68

Karen J. Burstein

68

Sara Pasti

Window
19

20

Question Marks

20

Toward a Synthetic
Art Education

Dress

Sewing Class
The Reception

21

Father and General

21
A Timely Existence
21

72

Carol Clements

73

Amy Edgington

74

Emma Amos

Brother and Sister / White

and Company

Dress I / Statue Pointing /
Critics

Jill Pierce

27

Diane Pontius

28

Clarissa T. Sligh

29
29

Kristin Reed
Tomie Arai

32

33

Pm Tired of Being Angry

Beating the Odds
Socrates

Love Story

On Being an American Black Student

The Interview

Boys’
Care
Centerthe: Body
in
the Club
South Day
Bronx
Educating

Pamela Wye

Predominant Ideology Classroom 3

Classroom 4

Welcome to You See

35

Learn to Earn

The Final Call

36

Mary Sojourner

38

Nancy Wells

38
40

Janet Culbertson

49
49

Judite dos Santos

49

Joni Sternbach

49

Dawn Aotani

78

Rachel Vigier

78

Brahna Yassky

Diane Pontius

79

80

Joan Herbst Shapiro

82

Kabuya P. Bowens

Dangerous Discussions
Dominican Republic

84

What They Write About
in Other Countries

The Offering
I Met a Man Who

Untitled

Anonymous, C.C. Hamil-

86

Catherine Clarke

87

Letters to the Editor

Fences

89

Sallie McCorkle

90

Martha Reed Herbert

The Beginning of an

Untitled I

Signs/Signals
Untitled

Bone By Bone

Alex Stavitsky

ton, Barbara A. St. John

Staying Horrified
Classroom

91

Lynne Cohen

Beehive

92

E.A. Racette

Untitled

94

Joni Sternbach

96

Kate Millett

Madhouse Madhouse

INSIDE

50

Carol Wolfe Konek

Dear Professor Vile

Extraordinary Friendship

Heather Susan Haley

Leigh Kane and

83

Knows He Knows
47

Nancy Spero

76

Chinatown

34

Batya Weinbaum

75

Kids Playing at the Gramercy

Learning to Play

Carol Feiser Laque

Jerilea Zempel

61

62

White Elitist Colleges

The Library

Gail Draper

57

Poem for Dirty Boys

Brainhouse

Aisha Eshe

Joni Sternbach

an Excellent Teacher

An Open-Trench-Coat

in the Gaza Strip

Meryl Meisler and

Sophie Rivera/LNS

56

Fifth Grade
So Help Me Hannah

Deborah Willis

55
System

Untitled

Pig of Knowledge

The Secret

BACK

Claire Moore

COVER

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C

N e

eNe
T. Heresies education

collective came together at Rutgers University.

O.. collective developed a healthy respect for the many scholarly

Several years have passed since we began work-

journals we combed for interesting subjects,

ing together, and some of us are no longer con-

formats, and ideas. Scholars and theoreticians

nected with that (or any other) university. We

write articles that reflect their years of research.

will, however, always be involved with the proc-

University presses and associations (such as the

ess of learning and will never cease being students
and teachers.

College Art Association) provide an enormous
service by publishing this work. The women who
responded to our call for submissions, however,

] nitially we believed that
working on the Heresies education issue would

responded not with theoretical material but with

serve to clarify ideas we had about the neces-

personal accounts of their own experiences with
education — formal and otherwise. We found

sity (or lack thereof) of formal education and a

that many women responded from the view-

university degree. We were also curious to hear

point of having been miseducated (or myth-

about women’s experiences in other learning sit-

educated; it seems there are an abundance of

uations. Once the collective began to meet, it became clear that the matter of formal education

institutional horror stories to be told). But we

was a secondary one.

inspired and uplifted us. In our search for mate-

also received many stories about learning that
rial we discovered that if rote learning, final exams,

O: primary importance,

tenure hearings, lesson plans, and racial and sex-

it seemed, was the effect of education, both for-

ual exploitation are integral to the process of ed-

mal and informal. How have we, and all other

ucation, so are warmth, introspection, and per-

women, been formed into who we are? What

sonal exploration.

role models have we followed, what constraints

T. women who wrote

and freedoms have we been taught? How has
what we’ve been taught affected our dreams and

to us have insights and visions to share that might

expectations of what we can hope to achieve in
our lives? These are some of the questions that

not have found a place in the more “serious” publications. We desired to take our contributors se-

helped shape this issue of Heresies.

riously and become a platform for their voices.

SARA PASTI is a painter, printmaker, and arts organizer who lives and works in Brooklyn.
E.A. RACETTE is an artist and founder of Biophilic Activities Inc.
VALERI SIVILLI is a painter/printmaker/teacher/gardener who lives and works in Brooklyn, NY/Frenchtown, NJ.
Special thanks to Miriam Taylor.

E vp

sinat
i i ` ON
EFL re
ON
7
S/a

3 , AN

DI
Staff: Avis Lang, managing editor A/thea N. Davidson, administrative assistant A/pha Selene Anderson, intern
Design: Mary Sillman Typesetting: Kathie Brown and U.S. Lithograph, typographers
Editorial and Production Assistance: Laura Baird Sue Heinemann Lanie Lee Kate Panzer Risa Wallberg
Printed by Wickersham Printing Company, Inc., Lancaster, Pennsylvania

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I (The Beginning)

Sitting small so as to be unnoticed,

my stomach spoke in alternations
of pain and fear.
Ill (The End)

Looking back I wonder if the teacher saw
the anxious looks of dread

Out from under the thumbs of others,

and passed me by deliberately.

the search for who I was began.

Ah, Compassion, I honor thee.

Again and once again the repetition
of the school and its command

Publicity, it seems, was evidently

brought me back to recognition

the real root of agony,

of that fearful child.

and not the unknowingness of facts.

I acted out the same scenario, wasting time,

Apprehension of close attention to my self

until at last, leaning forward,

chased away the open exchange of ideas,

lifting the chains from my ankles

and I passed through schooltime

without a blink,

in a huge cocoon of self-made isolation.

I tossed them to the side.

II (The Middle)

IV (Epilogue)

Somehow (the magic oft all!) — a slit,

Yesterday I met a man.

a tiny crevice in the wrapping

His esoteric school, he chastened,

showed me wondrous worlds

stood for helping hands.

that needed to be known.

Even though, he hastened to reveal,

And only through participation

we must trust just ourselves,

could I move from plant to flower.

it cannot be done alone.

I reached and drank.

The moisture nourished my anorexic soul
and filled it not with facts,
but questions.
Still frail and stupid

from so many dark Decembers,
mistakes were plentiful,
and starting over came to be a trend.
Alice Shapiro has published poetry in Poetry Connoisseur (national anthology prizewinner), Assembling 13, and several anthology publications. Also a playwright, her
first work, Four Voices, was produced in 1988 and received the Bill C. Davis Drama Award.

Heresies 25

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Јапеѓ Уйсагќо ѓо ап агііаі сиггеп Ну іпеоіоед ийЬ тедќа рЬоѓодгарЬу. ЅЬе оед іп МУС апд іп Ње рамі ўїое уеаго Баа огдапіхед +Њоша нй РАОО.

ИЙ Тае]
Еаисайоп

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he most useful course
that an art school could
offer today would be one

spite the change in emphasis.
The basic fact of the artist's existence remains that no one asks

called “On Failure And Anonym-

you to do whatever it is that you

ity,” for these are the truest condi-

do, and just about no one cares

tions of the artist's life, all artists,

once you've done it. Art in our era

even the great and famous ones.
Art schools are graduating hundreds of MFAs, thousands of BFAs
a year; many of these graduates

is a self-generated activity, and the
marketplace is for most artists just
a transient delusion.

Which of these existences

have their eyes firmly fixed on the youthful fame and

should art schools prepare students for? The fantasy

financial success of a handful of exceptionally tal-

of a retrospective at a New York museum before the

ented, ambitious, and lucky men. In one generation

age of forty or the lifetime of art practice? The answer

art has come from being considered a financially mar-

some students give is distressing. A CalArts graduate

ginal occupation to being seriously thought of as a

presented a paper at a CAA conference some years

potential source of wealth. :

ago in which she blamed the school for not having

This view is encouraged by the present confusion

prepared her for the realities of the art market,

between the older values and romantic scenarios of

specifically for not having provided enough of a post-

“high” art and the contemporary art market, a confu-

graduate network of connections to help her market

family farm and agribusiness. The long becoming of

emphasis on networking and salesmanship is huck-

an artist, the lifelong search for meaningful form, is

sterism, self-commodification, packaging at the ex-

her work and herself. But the logical outcome of this

being interfered with by a huge influx of money and

pense of content. The art precipitated by this impera-

of media attention and influence. Artists are now pres-

tive to “make it” tends to be fast work that can be

sured by considerations and expectations of immedi-

sold easily and quickly. Even “angst” must be “lite.”

ate, youthful financial success, although the ratio

The transformative nature of artwork may be degraded

of such successes has not significantly altered de-

into the distillation of “Raw Hype” into ‘Pure Hype,”

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as depicted in a New Yorker cartoon.
In the last five years not a term has gone by without
a few, inevitably male, students bringing up how much
money art is selling for. Only once in a while has a
student, usually female, told me that she was in art

ommend it to anyone except to the artist for whom
there is no other choice.
However, some artists are ‘successful’ in the commercial sense. But that success may not come for
years, it probably will not last if it does come, and it

school to “find out what this painting thing was

has unforeseen consequences. No matter how imper-

about,” and, even more significantly, looked to me

vious the individual may feel to corruption, success

with some concern and asked if, being a woman artist, I had a “life”?
Problems particular to gender aside, yes, I have a

can corrupt, erasing past ideas and ideals. The earlier it comes the more likely that is. Success is never
enough; the need for more is insatiable. Success can

life. But the question is a crucial one. Expectations

lead to paranoia. Those young men everyone looks to

of glory veil the real life of the artist, and if being in

as examples are all obsessed with those who might

the studio is the priority, the life is difficult.
Let us consider first the more obvious and predictably difficult life of the artist who is not a financial

want to get at them, knock them down. Because of
their success they see themselves as targets, as indeed they had targeted the previous generation, for

success (that is to say, the majority of artists). This is

the link between progress/success and forms of patri-

a life of total insecurity. The artist is a pre-Columbian

cide is grafted into the belief structure of Western

sailor adrift on a flat ocean at whose edge is an abyss.
just past the point the rent money runs out. Jobs are

civilization. Success can be paralyzing; approval can
prevent change, because change risks the destruc-

boring, ill paying, distracting,

tion of the desired commodity.

and exhausting. Or a more seri-

Conversely, enforced, artificial

ous involvement with a “real” job
thrēatens the continuity and ultimately the continuation of artwork. The committed artist risks
being perennially broke, not to
say penniless, a bum in fact. To
be poor is to be infantilized in
a country where adulthood is

“change” can become the commodity. Praise can be as intimidating as criticism. Both equally
disturb the ecology of the life of
the studio.
Real success is the ability to
continue making art that is alive.
For this the artist has to be edu-

equated with financial indepen-

cated to another set of values and

dence. This life is grueling, ego

a broader scope. Yet art schools

battering, embittering, filled

underemphasize practical skills,

with deprivation. I do not rec-

liberal arts courses, and, worse

IANA
Education

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yet, even their art history courses are often insufficient

paths that are taken. Life continues only as long as

and cursory.

the blind chase down the path. There is tremendous

To survive the long run, to continue to function,

fear on that chase because the relationship between

someone ought to tell you that there is a long run. To

artist and artwork is one of intimacy with the self,

survive, it is necessary to stand for something within

and intimacy is truly terrifying and can never be fully

yourself and yet to always doubt your own deepest

achieved. The closer one comes to something really

beliefs. It is necessary to have the agglomeration of

intimate (which may seem really foreign), the faster

terrors and hopes, delights, and doubts that make up

one springs back, and thereby fails.

a soul. Perhaps a soul is culturally bound and determined, but it can be more than a slave to fashion.

espite the fear of intimacy and the impos-

Follow fashion and be fifteen minutes late. Trends

sibility of achieving completeness within

are fleeting. A lifetime of art cannot be built on a

and without, there can be a wonderful

weather vane.

sense of anonymity in the practice of art. As at a noisy

Real failure comes to those who accept their status

flea market, sometimes a silence and a slowness can

quo, who do not press against their limitations. This

overcome the busyness, and then small, insignificant

seems to happen more or less to almost all artists, at

treasures become distinct. In these moments you know

some point down the path. The artist is an organism,

no one and are no one. A friend of mine describes in

genetically condemned to atrophy and death as all

terms of reverence and sexuality the rags she wears

living organisms are. Only the persistence of dissat-

when she paints. Every layer discarded and replaced

isfaction and struggle ensure a

by street clothes is an added layer

true form of success in the life of

of anxiety and loss of intimacy

the artist.

with her self.

The life of the work, the ecol-

The greatest thing an art school

ogy of the studio is what | am in-

could give a student is access to

terested in, when the doors are

this anonymous life of the studio,

closed on the pressures of the

recognition of its supreme impor-

marketplace. And in this life there

tance to the inner survival of the

is always failure, no matter how

artist, and to the creation of mean-

much money is made. For it is a

ingful art that transcends fashion

and money. X

given that there is always a gap
between what the artist wants the
work to be and what it is, between

Mira Schor, a painter living in New York,
is coeditor of ME/A/N/Y/N/G, a jour-

the original goal and the weird

nal of contemporary art.

Nancy Wells

Heresies 25

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: E. A. RACETTE

In third grade there was one bad boy named James

He gave the nun the finger, the bird, flipped her off,
or whatever term you know for that hand signal that means fuck.

She was soooo upset! and obvi i

viously excited. She went and told

the other nun and they both, together, made each of us children
individually, by ourselves, come out into the hall and describe to them
what the sign meant!!! and they kept asking for more details.
I don’t know what the other«children said. I said it's when two grown

people take off all their clothes, and they said, “YESSSSSS ...???

o..

AND ...???”

And they put their bodies together, I said. Iwas so shy
and nervous and I felt that I wasn’t supposed to know so I felt

shame because I knew. They were so insistent on my describing it.
Now I am imagining how wet their sweet little cunts must have been that day.

<> > M a A A A i iA i i A A a R a A

Donna J. Evans is a printmaker-cartoonist-painter-bookmaker. She wads born in Dayton, Ohio, in 1956 and
moved to NYC in 1984.

The Art of

Education

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Fifth Grade
On the wooden floor

NIKKI HERBST

plaster-of-Paris bust of

Katherine Karr drew the
GREAT LAKES
in white chalk so she could
ETCH the image

and it SMASHED
on the floor

right next to Buzzy Olsen.

in their minds.

Lake Erie had little whitecaps
where she'd hit the floor

I can't remember

repeatedly

if he'd been asleep, noisy, or stupid

during her lecture.

he was
so often

I felt her anger as she jumped
from a chair

to STOMP a verb-with-no-object into them
landing BANG on old-lady black shoes:
JUMP!

She worked, climbing from the Great Lakes

ASLEEP, NOISY, or STUPID
and no one knew
if she'd missed on purpose
so it worked

for AWHILE to keep
their attention.

to the chair top

again, BANG,
and again, BANG:
JUMP!

I went in early and stayed late

and she şnapped at me:
THERE'S NOTHING FOR YOU HERE
well, take this

She was dry and thin but

she could land
HARD: NOW,
who can tell me what kind of verb
'jump'

is? While the others laughed

and READ it.

I read THE AGONY AND THE ECSTASY
right there in class

while she tried to teach them
arithmetic, geography, and social studies
jumping, throwing, and shouting.

or stared open-mouthed
I squirmed

wanting to SHAKE them.
I loved her.

Later there were other books she gave me:
read THIS.

But they also meant:
don't raise your hand to answer in class

She put us in rows: you are

the HAVES, you are
the HAVE-NOTS.
She didn't have patience for niceties:

or the others will never try.

They also meant:
I'm sorry.

I ACCEPTED

these two rows are the

the whole message

bluebirds and the rest of you

tucked inside the book bribes.

are the redbirds.

She had to teach the SIMPLEST THINGS
to those who'd been
nicely lied to
for years already.

After the first quarter
I took my
report card with my

FIRST EVER GOOD GRADE IN CITIZENSHIP
and jammed it

She apologized
for neglecting us haves

at my fourth grade teacher's FACE
as I passed her in the hall

but she never said I'm sorry

or at least

when she threw

that's what I remember.

the gold-painted

I was TRIUMPHANT.

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e ‫و‬

eevee

Heresies 25

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Lately the names and images of special
kids have started coming back to me from
my fifteen years as an elementary school
teacher. Some days | wake up with an urgent need to get to school, to get on with
the work. Some days | wake up with a
warm feeling as if I've made contact with
“my kids” for the first time, a glow of rec-

ognition and accomplishment like an enthusiastic hug. Often | see the kids or their
parents in my dreams: Leticia with her long
black braids so tight they gave her almondshaped eyes; Jesus with his starched,

CRICKET POTASH

ironed white shirt daily, accompanied by
his mother always in a black shawl; Jimmy
and his mom waiting in the yard; Jose's
father coming in the door with the cardboard shoe he'd made.
My first year as a teacher was 1969. |

Angeles because | knew some Spanish:

;At the time Spanish wasn't needed

for the job, even though most of the kids
had never spoken anything else. Technically a barrio is a neighborhood, though
the word is often used as a synonym for
ghetto. Even now in the late 1980s East
Los Angeles has the largest Spanishspeaking population outside Mexico City.
In 1969 we were part of the last wave of
teachers hired in a teacher shortage.
In many ways conditions have never
been so wonderful for teachers in the public schools as they were then. The 1970s
were years today’s teachers can only imagine, especially if they teach in inner-city
schools. We had money for materials and
training from many federal titles: compensatory education, bilingual education, sex
equity, and so on. We were to/d to be innovative, to develop our own curricula. We
were rewarded for involving community
volunteers; we were encouraged to develop
learning continuums, to hold parent conferences instead of reducing a child’s
learning mastery to a single letter or number. | rejoice that | never häd to fill our a
report card until the e i of my career.
I hurried through my teaching years.
Many things that happened didn't really
experience at the time. Now%they seem

Joni Sternbach

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to be floating right on the surface of my
memory. | reach in and there they are,

and to see it displayed.
Daily we sang, in Spanish, the song'‘tfläi

encapsulated, wrapped in wonderful iri-

was the shoe's inspiration. This short fit

descent globes, ready to be taken out and

song—“El Zapatero (The Shoemaker)” —

examined.
I had had to abruptly leave the class-

proved to be a favorite. The lyrics and a
translation (not lyrical) follow:

room—a profession, an identity, and a
community in which I had invested fifteen

EL ZAPATERO
Yo lo dije al zapatero

acute exacerbation of multiple sclerosis,
a disease | knew I had but which had produced no symptoms in me for over ten
years. Suddenly, bumping into walls and
not being able to stand for more than five
minutes, worrying about falling down the

que me hiciera unos zapatos
con el piquito redondo,
como tienen los patos.
¡Malhaya zapatero!
Como me engano!
Me hizo los zapatos

stairs more than the kids getting out safely
y el piquito no!
during a fire drill, not being able to quickly
get to the kid who had split his lip to com-

fort him, I was forced to face my need to
leave teaching. Now | have more time to
remember those years.
One memory: the cardboard-and-construction-paper shoe Jose's father made
for us, an exact copy of a sturdy walking
shoe, probably the size that would have fit
his seven-year-old son. I accepted it with
“mil gracias,” a thousand thanks, and a

THE SHOEMAKER
I told the shoemaker
to make me some shoes
with a tip as round

as a duck's beak.
That darn shoemaker!
How he tricked me!
He made the shoes but

Not the tip! s

P”
E7

my working table, where the children

four

would see it when they came to work with

Piquito means little beak as well as tip.

me. Now it's on a shelf above my desk.

Jose's father made his shoe with a won-

It’s faded and has been mended several

derful bird's beak.

times in its travels—the colours were
bright when | first saw it. The body is made

For me, the first three years of teaching

from a heavy brown supermarket bag, the

were the hardest. | learned to juggle the

heel and sole made of cardboard finished

hundreds of small, slippery balls that were

off smoothly, like slick new soles. Bright

aspects of my profession: schedules,

green satin wrapping ribbon decorates

meetings, spitballs, parent conferences,
candy addiction, test anxieties (theirs and
mine) fist fights, and outright defiance. |

fringed section of purple construction

learned basic control techniques as well

paper that holds the laces and gracefully

as my own limitations—just how many

ends in e/ piquito, the head and beak of

reading groups | could keep track of and

a bird. There are also upside-down horse-

how much homework I would look at. The

shoes on the ankles, cut out of bright

week I had yard duty was especially chal-

multicolored wrapping paper. The top lace

lenging. I couldn't do any set-up or relax

hole, carefully punched, holds a small

with a cup of coffee or go to the bathroom |

name tag with the artist's spelling of his

while the kids were out at recess. It be- a Nu

name, “Joze.” | try to imagine what it

came almost Pavlovian to respond to bels.

meant to Jose, an illiterate itinerant worker,

Even today | find myself sort of waiting for. Pp

to make this for his son to take to school

something at 11:30 a.m.—it's time for the

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C

lunch bell. I learned to extend my authority from my person (5' 3” tall and parked

dance as they spun their chrysalises. The
class clown held his breath along with the

near the lunch benches) to the far kickball

rest of us as the furry caterpillars sealed

diamond without shouting or running after,

themselves into their temporary changing

for example, the culprit with the matches. rooms. 1,

I learned to be larger than life, to have eyes The next two weeks were filled with in- $
everywhere and ears, too. How else could
I have learned those Spanish curses my

classroom was quickly converted into a

me? $

covered the walls with drawings ahd

scaled-down mission control centeriWe

loved all the learning I did during those

diagrams. What we had seen, what we

yeéärsrT was wide open to finding out who

guessed was going to happen, and what

these small people were, anxious to give

we had learned as fact. The chart rack

them the love and respect I felt I had been

carried daily bulletins; the science table

deprived of during my school years. |

held the jars of twigs with their strange

learned how much a seven-year-old knows

translucent leaves, the chrysalises. We

and how much a seven-year-old wants to

crossed off days on the calendar, read

know. I learned how easily, how quickly

what we recorded, drew pictures of what

their curiosity about the unknown and their

we saw. We used as many books as | could

tender confidence when they've learned

find to learn who these creatures were,

something new can be squelched with a

what would happen next.

harsh glance or an unjust rule.
I had a wonderful time learning with my

The class made predictions, developed
theories. Which one would come out first,

classes—keeping a Spanish/English dic-

what would it look like, would it be a but-

tionary at hand, right next to the Pequeño

terfly or “only” a moth? There was always

Larousse lllustrado with its encyclopedic

a team of at least two observers letting ev-

information and beautiful color illustra- =%

eryone know about any changes. Tu

# È tions. The Larousse was invaluable. How

This went on until one day during read- www

& fve else would we have known which dino- ; sx ing there was a silent movement noticed k seven
saur was which, or what to call webbed

by the observation team. A change of col-

feet in Spanish and how to distinguish

or that had been noticed yesterday was

them from talons? Or colors? Red, blue,

interesting—this was exciting.

and yellow simply weren't enough to name
the deep reddish-purple of Anna's jacket

Everything in the regular schedule%
stopped. No one cared if it wäStheir turn

or the shimmering green on the ducks in

to play handball. The kickball äiamond

the park.

was empty. There was no screaming, sfíov-

I learned to seize the time and teach

ing line at the water fountai

The, entire:

from what was happening. Like the day

class stayed in at recess to s

my class went out for their afternoon re-

happen next. We took the lids off the wide”

cess and found hundreds of woolly black

what would.»

mouthed jars and opened the trañsoms

caterpillars on the ground outside our tem-

in anticipation of the exodüs."©nçe again ø

porary bungalow. The fuzzy creatures

we all held our breath. Very slowly tħé

rained down from the mulberry trees, and

wet-winged newborns emerged. They

I think the girls jumping rope were first to

paused a moment to open and flex their

notice them as the ground got slickery

wings, then blew out of the room like tis-

under their feet. The cafeteria workers

sue paper scraps. One child, transfixed

scrounged some large empty mayonnaise

by the metamorphoses, asked in a whis-

jars for us. We collected leaves from the

per, “But ... where did they come from,

trees and twigs for the caterpillars to use

Teacher?" X

as anchors, then spent the rest of the afCricket Potash is an artiøst living in Los Angeles.

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EEE

P o e m
Write a poem beginning with “I want.”

MARIE CARTIER
and your bus driver

Write a poem about being in a room

in second grade

where everything is your favorite color

or your local drug pusher in tenth

and what you do there.

or your college admissions clerk

Write a poem about musical notes

or your first good English teacher.

that talk to you.

Then write a poem in appreciation

Write a poem about whether or not you were

of your own voice.

breast-fed and how that feels.

Write a poem meant to be sung.

Write a poem about your favorite fairy tale

Praise Bessie Smith in it.

and why.

Write a poem meant to be whispered.

Write a poem using five words

Praise Daniel Berrigan in it.

that describe your perfect mother.

Write a poem meant to be screamed.

Write a poem using five words

Praise Patti Smith in it.

that describe your perfect father.

Write a poem about being black (if you're white).

Write a poem about mothers and fathers.

Praise Angela Davis in it.

Write a poem about turning eleven

Write a poem about being white (if you're black).

and twenty-one

Praise Bobby Kennedy in it.

and what your initial thoughts were

Write a poem about being poor (if you have money).

on leaving decades behind.

Praise Caesar Chavez in it.

Write a poem that would solve the

Write a poem about being rich (if you have no money).

problems of the world

Praise Eleanor Roosevelt in it.

if everyone read it.

Write a poem about missing the city (if you're from the country).

Write a poem about candlelight, wine,

Praise neon lights in it.

soft music — alone.

Write a poem about missing the country (if you're from the city).

Write using your favorite part of your body

Praise a cornfield in it.

as the voice.

Write a poem about writing a poem

Write in the voice of your favorite musician

about writing a poem about writing a poem.

your best lover

Then write your poem.

your first-grade teacher

Praise yourself in it.

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Windows
We made a window with all really great stories, but

My friend told me to go back down the block. His sister

I have to admit mine was the best. I’m not trying to

was upset, his friends and everybody in his family were

be conceited or anything, but I just had to tell you
the truth.

very depressed.
I can tell you a lot about Lakisha Owens. She is nice,

My feelings about the story about Michael is that it was
a very sad thing that happened. He was shot, and I ran
down my block to see what was going on and everybody
was telling me that Michael was shot. I looked and I saw
blood dripping down from his neck. I was throwing up.

self-centered. She is fourteen years old. She can be very
quiet sometimes, but when she is mad it’s best that you
shouldn’t say nothing to her. She is very bashful sometimes. But Lakisha is very nice in her artwork, and she
has a little talent in her writing.

Lakisha Owens December 11, 1989

The Art of

Education

== 18

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» 9
(ye y ) s

-A

i ri

ME?

Question Ty
We, Meryl Meisler and the Drop Ins, did the Question
Marks. We took a lot of photographs to show people that
1.S. 291 was never built right and is all messed up and
dirty. We wrote short stories to go with the pictures. It
was a lot of fun doing the Question Marks. If it wasn’t

a KaR

for Ms. Meisler, we never would have had the chance to
question what was wrong with our school.

I, Lucy Gonzalez, am 5'7", chubby and light-skinned, with

in I.S. 291 for four years. I was left back because I failed
two major subjects—math and science— so I didn’t graduate. I am happy because I got Ms. Meisler again, three
yeafs straight. I love Ms. Meisler’s class because I learn
a lot of things with cameras and we take pictures.
Lucy Gonzalez November 27, 1989

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was the recipient of a 1989 New York Foundation for the Arts fellowship. Her a
work has recently been published in Aperture.

“Marilyn this looks just like a rág”

and threw it on the closet floor
Na oset

A

The Art of

Education
e A

' <

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: Viia x.
Carolien stikkor

Father and General, 1986, photograph.

Over the past few years we have watched many of the reputedly ‘‘progressive’” schools succumb to the pressure of

the back-to-basics movement. They now offer enriched white bread, but white bread just the same. The

“open classroom,” a catchall term for experimental and innovative education, is becoming known as the failure of the

overpermissive sixties. Many of the educational principles of discovery and respect are being lost. So four

years ago we opened a school to confront this trend. The following is a distillation of the process of creating

a responsive curriculum that emerges from the needs and interests of the school community.

Children are seekers, trying to make sense of the
world. In creating a curriculum, my most important task
is to engage their imagination. At the root of reading,
writing, math, and science is the imagination being applied to physical and spiritual experience. lf it seems
possible to make sense of the world, children will want
to become competent in the means of communication

by society.
So I outward
begin with
care aboutmeanp.
wi offered
paper deeply.
We work
fromwhat
whatthey
is internally
pen
ingful to the disciplines and tools of thought, expres-

Heresies 25

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Chanukah story, scouring the book for images. With
very little guidance they devised both the more universal symbols of Judaica (menorahs, stars of David, latkes) and their own idiosyncratic ones, such as “the
wife of a Maccabee.”

T'he students are also asked to use and interpret symbols. This may or may not include words. Recipes, for
instance, are written in a combination of words and
pictures. A series of craft books are available with sequenced picture instructions that the children translate into cars, boats, monsters, and castles. Familiar
signs are an opportunity to include print and enhance
their sense that they can learn to read. The children
are indeed using a much broader range of cues to interpret print, including color, shape, configuration, and
script. A very young reader soon learns to distinguish
STOP and EXIT signs, as well as A & P's, and most assuredly, McDonald's.
At Rosh Hashanah a visitor came to share some of
the meaning and ritual of the holiday. After | reassured
him that the children had become familiar with the
idea of human sacrifice during our study of the Aztecs,
he decided to tell them the story of Abraham and his
son. He emphasized that God was teaching the world
sion, and relationship. The curriculum evolves differently
each year based on shared passions, tragedies, and
routines.

that the taking of human life was not required as homage, and that at that time in history, animal sacrifice
was taking the place of human sacrifice. “Oh, that's
"m

LANGUAGE ARTS
It is hard to isolate a language arts program and assign it to a particular time of day, or to think of it as a

just like in ‘Snow White,

piped up one girl. There was

a puzzled pause.
“What do you mean?” he finally asked us.
“Well, the hunter kills a pig instead of Snow White

collection of rules regarding verb agreement and de-

and then takes its heart back to the queen,” answered

pendent versus independent clauses. Embedded

the girl. | was floored by her grasp of what was

among the rules of grammar and syntax is a deep struc-

significant in this story, and how it pertained to an-

ture of content. The meaning behind the form is what

other. This is no less than a fledgling study of compar-

we want to express for ourselves and communicate to

ative literature, the formal discipline in which plots and

others. Two-year-olds speak in this deep structure of

themes are compared and contrasted from one story

meaning—using nouns and verbs. Then they learn to

to the next.

elaborate and refine shades of meaning and finally to

Contrasts themselves can be instructive in a curric-

conform to formal standards of language, the surface

ulum where values are also the subject of analysis.

structure. At heart, language and its written represen-

This year we read a black American folk tale about

tation are symbols, which both express and shape

Flossie and the fox. Before long it became obvious to

thought.

us all that this was a variation of “Little Red Riding

By five, children can exercise symbolic thought in a
variety of ways. They are asked to create symbols to
represent their experience or understanding. Perhaps

Hood.” What was interesting to me, in my battle to find
ways to make children conscious of the sexism embedded in our culture, was the fact that in this story,

memories of a field trip or pictures to illustrate an oral

Flossie outwits the fox! She is clearly capable of taking

story will activate these symbols. Once the class made

care of herself: intervention on the part of a heroic wood-

lotto boards based on a fairly complex version of the

cutter was entirely unnecessary. Given the opportunity,

T Nao)
N

Education

N

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the children were able to describe this distinction and

fessed, “I remember pumpkin because | use an or-

thereby call it into consciousness.

ange pen.”

MATHEMATICS
Reading, like other language skills, begins with what
is made most meaningful to children. Because differ-

In math itis necessary to develop a deep tactile knowl-

ent kids think in different ways, we can offer and be

edge of mathematical principles. Using three-dimen-

aware of a variety of methods that will be more or

sional objects allows the children to handle the “stuff”

less appropriate for a given child. | primarily use a

of numbers. We group things and discover how they

method that reflects the holistic thinking of most five-

fall into patterns and hold certain properties in com-

year-olds, as opposed to the more analytical thought

mon. The recognition of patterns is a foundation not

required for, say, a phonics approach.

only of math but also of reading, language, science,
music, and movement. In linking these various mani-

I help them begin to read with key words: each word

festations of pattern and rhythm, we are again cultivat-

is chosen by a child for its personal significance. They

ing flexibility, which lies at the heart of creativity.

choose such words as 7yrannosaurus rex, pumpkin,

Math offers its own perspective on the world. There

ice skater, scuba diver, crystal. Among the key words

are numerical relationships in the repeating pattern of

there is hardly one word from the Dolch Word List of

a design, the symmetry of a snowflake, the rhythm of

words most common in the English language. In the
beginning they use a whole constellation of cues to
identify a word—its length, its initial letter, a mental

F

music, and the spiraling spines of a pine cone. These
F schoolmate

patterns, represented by claps and snaps, numbers,
140

and letters in the kindergarten, will become patterned
sequences of numbers. Still later it will be learned that
the sequences can be generated by formulas and represented graphically by rose curves and parabolas.
It is important first to engage the children’s imagination in the materials and create as many opportunities for discovery as possible. To allow the kids to involve themselves with the materials, | arrange a time
for free exploration of what are intended as the “math
manipulatives.”
Building blocks offer a physical knowledge of proportion, balance, geometry, and the relationship of
parts to wholes. On the table might be a basket of
smaller pattern blocks—diamonds, hexagons, triangles,
squares, and trapezoids proportionate to one another.
Though two-dimensional block designs are nearby, the
children are left to use the pieces as they choose. They
discover they can build on a flat surface or that the
pieces can be stood on edge to build towers of questionable stability.
Sometimes my role is to bite my tongue. For several
days the kids had been exploring how high they could
build their towers. My first impulse was to “expand their
knowledge” by blurting out that triangles make very
stable bases. I checked myself and asked if they could
find a more stable base. With that aim in mind, a plethora of new techniques evolved. Instead of using the
precarious narrow edge, the children began alternating “floors” and “walls” to create high rises, or stacking
the pieces horizontally on their broad sides, making for
sturdier but shorter zigzagging piles. In the end they

Carolien Stikker White Dress I, 1986, photograph.

N

Heresies 25

wW

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knowledge of the world. So we begin with their knowledge of the world, and cultivate the tools for analyzing
it through mathematics.
Measuring is a mathematical tool taught to the children early in the program. We use the length of feet and
hands as a standard measurement, creating a context
for discovering the need of a more objective standard.
We compare heights. We graph temperatures as a comparison of the lengths of the mercury measured each
day. We count down to find the days remaining until
Halloween; we count up to see how many people were
born in the year of the dog.

Graphing offers another way to organize information
and call attention to aspects that might otherwise be
overlooked. For instance, the pet chart quantified which
pets were most likely to be found in the home of a
kindergartener. At the same time the children shared
what animals were important to them. The discussion
surrounding the chart evolved into Pet Week, during
which we met many of the animals represented on the
graph. This math lesson also allowed us to be of comfort to a sad and subdued boy when his dog, now familiar to us all, died later in the year.

PHYSICAL SCIENCES
In the sciences | am again less concerned with imparting a specific body of knowledge than with helping
discovered a variety of aspects of height, balance, and

the children develop a way of thinking, namely what
we call scientific method. | introduce the elements of

stability.

There was a progression during the year from mis-

inquiry and testing and try to create situations that

cellaneous piles to designs and entire scenes that took

challenge the children’s newly forming ideas about

into account the geometric properties of and relation-

cause and effect. What is a reasonable test? What do

ships among pieces. One girl envisioned an entire fair,
combining flat and three-dimensional constructions to

we accept as proof?
The day we tackled melting, I asked the five-year-olds

fashion a haunted house and a pleasantly abstract

to predict what they thought might melt. Prediction cre-

merry-go-round. Certain days inspired outdoor scenes,

ated the opportunity for dissonance. Predicting required

with a tray as backdrop for flowers growing amid grass

them to accommodate what they thought would hap-

and butterflies. Once they’d fully explored the possibil-

pen to what did happen and to ponder why this was

ities and had a working knowledge of the pieces, I found

so. We tried ice, butter, crayons, wax, and cinnamon.

I could limit or refine what they did in order to enhance

Questions and opportunities for predictions arose along

their explorations, and they accepted my suggestions

the way. Which will melt faster? Why? Which will solid-

willingly.

ify away from the heat? Which will stay melted? What

Math has its own symbolic language. We must allow
the kids to become conversant with mathematical principles, draw them, and then write them, using the

other changes occurred as well? This excited further
curiosity, experimentation, and observation.
Most gratifying is the evidence that the methodology

“alphabet” of mathematical sentencing and graphing.

has been internalized and can be applied spontane-

Mathematics compares, quantifies, and orders our

ously. Suddenly the rice and bean table, a fixture in the
The Art of

Education

— 24

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room all year, became the basis for experiments. “I

to, well, a life-style of their own choosing. The children

want to add water to some rice and beans and see

have been slow to grant this at times.

what happens.” This girl’s enthusiasm spread until sev-

Another example is the magic wand. One little girl

eral children had cups of rice, beans, and water. The

brought in a blue plastic “magic wand,” which she in-

diversity of their observations made for a rich overall

vested with the power to make wishes, both good and

picture. One child noted what floated and what sank,

bad, come true. Her classmates seemed to accept this.

another observed that the skins of the beans eventu-

An otherworldliness crept into her voice whenever she

ally lifted and peeled. The first girl paid attention to the

spoke of the wand. Several days later at rest time she

changes in the color and odor of the water. By the next

left the room briefly. In her absence the others began

morning we all found out that the combination creates

to question her verity.

molds if left overnight! In science the idea of mistakes

“It’s not rea//y a magic wand.”

is most easily eradicated because it is the so-called

“I know, but she won't listen.”

mistakes that teach us so much. The kids accept and

“It came with a My Little Pony!”

view them positively as experiments, not errors.

When she returned to the room they felt it their responsibility to confront her with Reality. She held firm,

SOCIAL SCIENCES

and it was then | intervened. | neither upheld nor denied the magic of the wand. That was not the point. |

Perhaps the area | find most compelling is the social

did affirm her right to believe. She did not have to prove

sciences. Development is indicated by growth in em-

her faith to them, nor did they need to disprove her to

pathy, respect, historical knowledge, and refined judg-

justify their own beliefs. | trust that she will not always

ment. Children at this age are increasingly able to put

invest blue plastic with superhuman power, but I don't

themselves in another's shoes and must be challenged

want to inhibit the part of her that believes in a spiritu-

to do so. Empathy and concern must be valued within

ality beyond the physical. And I want all the children

the fiber of the classroom. Animals and insects have
played a major role in the kindergarten. Much of our

ofkeacher

discussion has circled around their dignity and rights

to be able to trust their own judgment and not feel
threatened by the existence of other beliefs. This is her
seed of faith, and as in many new religions, spiritual
strength is ascribed to an icon. It may not seem that a
My Little Pony wand has a lot of social relevance, but it
is just such small yet significant events that can reflect
values and reveal issues basic to human experience.
Another issue that came up was the concept of war.
The group was typically polarized, boys versus girls,
until they were forced to contend with a common foe
—the first/second graders. Among themselves they
began to refer to this class as the Rats, implementing a time-tested method to dehumanize the enemy.
I applauded their cooperation with one another. But
I sadly recognized that, as is so typical with humans, it
was borne of the desire to be against someone or
something else. Did they know what I was talking about?
There were several nods. I pointed out that they would
be living with those kids for perhaps five or six more
years, and we could not afford to be at war with them.
We briefly discussed the upcoming summit between
world leaders and decided it was time for a treaty of
our own. We wrote a lit of grievances, a plea to “stop
the warring,” and a suggested resolution. It was signed
by all and sent to the first/second grade. This impressed
the first/second grade, and they took up the concerns
of the kindergarteners seriously. They came up with

Heresies 25

mi

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their own list of rules for outside. Then we came together to exchange treaties and song. It was no cureall; there are still problems of intimidation. But it was
an important process in the search for alternatives in

I know these children will be introduced to much of
the mainstream through TV, books, and commercialization. So | tend to focus on the forgotten, omitted,
and intentionally distorted histories of our planet.

dealing with conflict.
It distresses me that we withhold or even lie to children in the name of protecting them from the “real
world.” People often create an aura of innocence around

We spent most of November confronting the stereotype of the wild Indian. By Thanksgiving | was pleased
with how much they'd absorbed when they told the

children and believe the preservation of this innocence

story back to me. But because these stories are some-

will rid the world of its ills. But there is nothing more

times in such conflict with what they've been led to

disillusioning than to discover that the fairy-tale world
we've encouraged them to construct exists nowhere.
We should protect children with honest information and
by installing hope and faith in their ability to act and
change their world. And there is no preservation of
innocence; our culture—good and bad—is too embedded in a child’s every experience. If we don't provide explanations and cultivate awareness, we are
condemning them to perpetuate both the virtues and
the evils of our history.

believe, even at five, they must be introduced and repeated in numerous ways. When a Native American
woman from the Speaker's Bureau came in January,
they were again doing a reality check. In one of their
thank-you's, a boy asked her, “Did the white people
really steal all the land from the Indians?”
I do not mean to destroy their love for their homeland. It was hard to accept that the army had traded
smallpox-infected blankets to a tribe with the intention
that they would all get sick and die. One boy commented, “Yeah, but they only did that once, right?” They
so want to believe in their country, and they should. To
me, patriotism requires looking honestly at our actions
and condemning those acts that threaten our nation's
professed ideals. We also fortify the children by studying the tradition of resistance, not the injustices alone.
We learn how this resistance was embodied in the lives
of Harriet Tubman, Susan B. Anthony, Martin Luther
King, Jr., and Malcolm X.
Finally, I am asking the five-year-olds to make a judgment on the basis of empathy, respect, and fact. I can't
deny my influence, that of their parents, the toy manufactures, and the media. However, we must provide
opportunities for the kids themselves to exercise their
ability to assess what is fair, what is right.

These ideas may be old, but I am saying them again.
Revisionist educators would have us return to the methods and mythology of the “idyllic” one-room schoolhouse, the drilling of basic skills through rote recitation.
They would have us believe that a highly structured,
3-R's program is sufficient to meet the complexities of
the lives of today’s children. | beg to differ. It does not
equip a child emotionally or cognitively; it does not respect the child. Though the structure appropriate for a
given child will vary, it must not be adjusted at the expense of creativity, discovery, and dignity. X
Gail Draper is currently teaching kindergarten in Los Angeles
at the Oaks School, a private progressive school she helped found
four years ago.

The Art of

Education

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JWL PIERCE

And I yelled
l am using the right film

So don't give me your goddamn attitude M

l am tired of being angry
I said

And don't tell me I am doing it the wrong way y

because it's true
I get consumed with anger and cannot work
because it takes me over
and I didt come to this fucking school

' <

And I said to the man at the photo store

I would like to take a look at that Bolex—how much does it cost?

And he said $200 ,

And I said p

That is an incredibly low price for a Bolex

ging this place and not get any of my
pend

I would like to shoot a roll and get it developed to see if there is

anything wrong with the camera
And I went back the next week with my film P
to shoot a roll

And he said

That's not a 16mm camera, honey < 4 s

that's a super-8 camera

We have got to keep fighting

And I said to them À

the Women's Film/Photo/Video Collective

27

is not a place for people to come and
expect help because they don't know what they are doing
itis a place for women to feel like they are not crazy because
they come into this goddamn building and immediately have to leave
because the air is so thick with hostility
that you can't breathe
and I am tired of feeling like a crazy person

come and take a look at it?

because no one will answer my questions and
I begin to feel invisible

And I vowed to carry hedging shears with me every time I went into the
film building

and she said b

“Bitches rule:"

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Ilove you too, Mom. Diane : That's a lot of love.
I love trees. I love all I didn't know you had
the trees in the world. that much love in you.

Lilly: Ya, for real. Lilly: Mom, I fellin love Diane : You did? Did you fall

I do, for real. with John. in love with me?

I love you, but I didn t
fall in love with you.
But, know what? ...
I fell in love with Dad.

1n N (o)

Setif

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was a twenty-year-old black girl. It

blonde hair and blue eyes. She smiled

heard the entire question. I knew I was

was spring in New York City. I had

and said, “Come in. You're just in time.”

in trouble. My mind began to flash news-

traveled by bus from southern Vir-

There were several rooms. Leading me

paper headlines. I racked my brain trying

ginia. The colors were grey—the sky, the

into one of them she said, “Make your-

to piece together a coherent stream of

buildings, the sidewalks, the trees. It was

self comfortable,” then left and returned

ideas. None would come. Despite pa-

Sunday morning. Only a few people

with a guy who was also about my age.

tient smiles, their eyes told me my per-

were on the streets. I hoped I wouldn't

She told me his name and said they

formance was disappointing. Their reali-

get lost. My knuckles and jaws were

would interview me together for the in-

ty was not mine. I could not debate or

tight.

ternational college student program.

discuss it. We clumsily made a few more

Their smiles did nothing to allay my fear

nonconnecting exchanges before I went

I knocked on a door inside a small
but well-kept midtown hotel. A young
woman not much older than me peeped
out. Thin and plain-looking, she had

or my nervous stomach.
“What is your opinion on AmericanRussian policy—?” they began. I never

29

back to the streets of Manhattan.
Anger and disappointment welled up.
I walked in a daze. I had traveled ten

Heresies 25

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hours to get there. In five minutes I

looked forward to attending elementary

pictures of Booker T. Washington and

learned what I had suspected all my life:

school, but what I found was incredibly

George Washington Carver were brought

boring. At age six I knew that the teacher,
who was black, did not care about most

proud, but we either fell asleep or tuned

not “the world.” I felt my first great

of'us. I can’t remember her ever show-

out.

doubt about why I was studying so hard.

ing delight in anything I did. So much

Elementary school had additional pit-

If all that diligence was not going to pay

had to do with just sitting there, just

falls. Fights often began on the play-

off, why do it? Feeling alone with the

serving time.

ground and on the way home from

humiliation and shame of that experi-

Our first “lesson” was to sit down and

school. I now see that those fights were

ence, I felt a new kind of fear and anxi-

be quiet. Our second lesson was to

ety begin to take root. I was terrified that

memorize the pledge of'allegiance to the

dignation, frustration, rage, and despair.

each succeeding encounter would reveal

flag. We did not understand what any of

I was glad I was not the teacher's pet,

more of'my vast ignorance of the white

the words meant. Being taught to per-

though none ofus really escaped. As victims ofinvalidation we acted out our dis-

man’s world. This is a story about how

form like trained dogs, we were given

I was trained to take my American Negro

stars and A’s when we were good; if we

female place.

could not perform, we were ridiculed

“safe” place we had; in the schoolyard,

and punished. When the teacher’s pun-

we practiced turning on ourselves and

e lived in a state that was ra-

ishment did not work, our parents were

tress patterns on one another in the only

our schoolmates. The seeds of internal-

cially segregated by law. My

called in. We were learning to behave,

ized racism sprouted as we learned to

parents, grandparents, aunts,

not to question or to think.

hate, fear, and mistrust one another.

and uncles often spoke quietly about

When it was time to go to junior high

events. They were afraid something aw-

ost of what I was taught in

school, I rode on a school bus past neat

ful would happen to us kids even before

school seemed foreign to

and well-equipped white schools to a

we grew up. As a young black child, be-

my life at home. Learning to

small, dilapidated black school. My

fore I could even think, I was told how

read from the Dick-and-Jane readers I

older brothers had been sent away to a

bad things are out there in the world,

thought, This must be how white children

better school. I felt my parents did not

how there’s no place for us, how people

play. These standard American public

care much about my education because

don’t like us.

school readers were published from 1935

I was a girl. I didn’t like going there at

Speaking my mind could get me killed.

to 1965. They presented the American

all, and although we never spoke of it,

My own thoughts and feelings were sec-.

family as well-to-do, northern European

the other black kids didn’t like it either.

ondary. My questions, curiosity, and en-

Caucasian Christians leading trouble-free

The bus trips were often tense and un-

thusiasm had to be bridled. Learning

lives. Along with the mythical ideals of

ruly. We knew ours was the worst school

this would help me survive. I was often

owning-class European culture, the mes-

in the county. During the ride, a handful

told: “Shut up!”; “Who asked you your

sage I got from my black teachers was

of kids dominated the rest of us by

opinion?”; “Who said so?”; “You don’t

that something was wrong with us if we

playing “the dozens”— talking about ev-

know what you’re talking about!’”;

were too different: skin too dark, hair

erybody’s mother in a negative way and

“Mind your own business!”

too short or too kinky, dress too color-

putting one another down. This was part

They felt that the sooner I learned to
speak only when spoken to and to say

— 30

out. This was supposed to make us feel

that my education had prepared me to
live only in an American “Negro world,”

ful, talk too loud.
I learned to be ashamed of'who I was.

of learning how to survive. If you could
not doit, you had to fight or silently with-

no more than I had to, the better it was

Slowly and laboriously we read each

stand humilation. You also learned to hide

going to be for me. It was a fear, a si-

word in Little Black Sambo, a book still

your feelings by being “cool” or to disguise

lence put into me—and most black

being published today. Even though we

them by being “tough.”

kids—to prepare us, to toughen us up

were six and seven years old, we knew

for the real world like soldiers for war. I

the story made fun of'us in a cruel and

urged us to study. Most of'us felt it wasn’t

learned to respond with words that had

demeaning way. Is this supposed to be

going to make a difference in our lives.

double meanings and with a rhythm and

some kind of joke? I thought as I exam-

We had learned that our way of talking,

pace that could change or modify any

ined the teacher'’s face to get a clue. I

which expressed our experiences, was

message I was trying to get across.

could see she was seriously trying to

not a legitimate language, that our way

Yet my parents had hopes that adulthood would be better for us than it had

teach us to read.
In fourth, fifth, and sixth-grade history

Inside the classroom the teachers

of singing and playing music was not a
legitimate musical expression, and that

been for them. I was sent to kindergar-

and geography classes, we learned about

our way of being in the world was seen

ten at age five. The teacher, a friend of

the bravery of American whites and

as uncouth. We saw how our people

my parents, made learning and school

about European imperialism, slavery, and

had to behave and talk differently “out

seem like a lot of fun. Because of that I

the “dark continent.” One week a year,

there,” to “smile and shuffle” in order to

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“get over.” We did not know the smiles

ing in a white woman’s kitchen. She was

enroll their children in white schools

were meant to hide the fear.

a domestic worker and dreaded this pos-

but were turned away. Almost overnight,

sibility. However, I had to be very care-

however, our rundown school was paint-

ful to try not'to be too smart. It was just

ed. A gymnasium, auditorium, cafete-

hose of us who showed ability

one more’thing to isolate me further

ria, and chemistry lab were added, and

coupled with willingness to pay

from the other students. Being from a

a new principal with a crew of young

attention were pushed by our

poor family, I could not afford the new

black teachers brought in. Students who

teachers. They preached that we owed

clothes, junk jewelry, and junk food

could not see the handwriting on the

it to our race to prepare ourselves to go

most of the students felt were impor-

wall were suspended from school, most

to college. They guided us into courses

tant. They were trying to have fun now:

of them never to return.

that would prepare us for technical jobs

life after high school seemed hard for

in fields with worker shortages. It was a

black people, an end to the freedom we

test of memory, of concentration, and

enjoyed at the moment.

Every few months we were tested, and
our test scores were published and discussed by everyone. The county board

of willingness to study and repeat the

At the same time, I learned from my

of education said it showed we would

ideas from the textbooks and teachers

father that being a black female was more

never survive in white schools and that

without debate or discussion. To them
it did not matter what we might want to

problematic than being a black male. I
longed to grow up and be on my own.

we were better off where we were. But
our parents knew our separate facilities

do. We were told they knew what was

Before that was to happen, the 1954

were not equal and would not give up

best for us.

Brown v. Board of Education Supreme

their efforts.

It wasn’t easy to decide to be a good

Court ruling that “separate but equal”

When black kids integrated the white

student, but my mother always threat-

schools were unconstitutional was to

schools, black parents and teachers told

ened that ifI didn’t study and get a schol-

change our lives and test us even more.

us we would have to work really hard to

arship to college, I would end up work-

Some black parents immediately tried to

prove ourselves. The white teachers

Heresies 25

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Sa AA A A A A ML MO A I I Ve JE OI WN TA TE TT Sf WT I PT EN I

Kristin Reed Predominant Ideology, 1988, krylon, xerox, gouache, chalk, 12X14".
Kristin Reed t4 a patnter, muralist, and graphic artist (tving and working tin NYC.

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didn’t say anything to us or about us;

sources of strength. Those of us who

it seemed nothing was good enough

couldn't make the shift fast enough failed

for them. When we did something we

a number of times, but those who kept

my efforts to hide behind the facade of

thought was better, they tried to act as

trying became almost unstoppable.

an educated person did a lot of damage

though it hadn’t happened. We quickly

self through the eyes of people who are
different from you. I hadn’t realized that

to the young black girl I was. When peo-

arrived at an understanding of the fact
that there was no room for us inside
white schools. Our blackness—the thing

y first college was a black

ple refuse to see you, who you are be-

school in southern Virginia.

gins to slip away and you start to feel

I got a scholarship to major

you don"t exist. I find that trying to ex-

that had always made us so visible—now

in the sciences but yearned to be a stu-

made us disappear.

dent in the art department. I had diffi-

causes tremendous conflict, not only

But our parents were determined that

press my real voice in my work often

culty appreciating the administration’s

within other people’s expectations, but

we would stay. To them, abuse was just

efforts to “civilize” us. Gloves, dresses,

within myself as well.

taken for granted. They would tell us that

and hats were a Sunday requirement. We

if we got the same training as white stu-

even had lessons in how to behave at an

dents and worked twice as hard, the

afternoon tea. We were required to at-

ble silence of isolation forces

world would see our talents and oppor-

tend ballet and classical music perfor-

me to continue to try to con-

espite the difficulties, the terri-

Tomie Arai

tunities would open up.
However, our white classmates picked
up our white teachers’ cues. They tried
not to see what was going on. As our
isolation mounted, we could not name

mances given by white groups brought

nect with others. Sometimes white peo-

in from elsewhere. Only slowly did this

ple say to me, “You must be very excep-

school become a little more relaxed.
Years later in art school I painted my

tional!” I have learned this is a way of
rationalizing that somehow I must not

white models red, blue, or green. Usu-

really be black. I know this is no accep-

what was happening to us, but we knew

ally my white instructors said nothing,

tance at all. When I try to point this out,

howit felt. When we tried to speak ofit,

but occasionally one would say, “That’s

the response is usually, “What are you

we were asked, “What are you talking

not the way you do it!”—meaning that

talking about?” There we go making

about?” and by our silence we hid our

was not the way to make art. But for

nonconnecting exchanges again. This

anger at the distortion of our identity and

me, art had to express how I saw, felt,

time I know it is not caused by some

the exclusion of our reality. We didn’t

and thought.

realize it at the time, but in order to

failing on my part. x

It was only much later that I began to
Clarissa T. Sligh, national coordinator of Coast

cope, we searched for new ways of being

understand what it meant to grow up in

to Coast: Women of Color Artists’ Projects, is an

in the world, began to draw on new

a culture where you learn to see your-

artist living in New York City.

Heresies 25

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Welcome to You See

which is “normal.” I became an
English teacher born with rabies and
a red pen. Freud looked away from

CAROL FEISER LAQUE

Trench mind, trench mouth manipulation
to win at all costs. I say I must

be a chairman because | am a

Oedipus and wrote the Ode to Pussy Wrecks

hermaphrodite—all that any man could

Complex without tearing out Jocasta's

destroy. No one can touch me or

Antigones or me the Sphinx.

Major Medical who has four stars

Welcome to Xerox University.

The highest degree | ever attained

will call the Boys at Affirmative

Lie down on the glass plate

at You See is 104. I got a

Action. Twenty-five committees will

and magically the Phallic bar

Doctorate and passed the test

of light comes over and under

for my Poetic License. I've always

Destiny, Psycho-affective, Dangling

you, passing through your mind

been driven. My life is never in

Modifiers of my genitalia, and

like Star Whores. Pay your

danger from free speech at a

I will demand the same xenophobia

tuition and duplicate the Phallic

fascist, totalitarian, appropriate

extended to all women, Jewish people,

bar of light, so one thousand good

University because of my Religion.

Blacks, Migrant workers, Mormons, Seventh

or reimbursement which is being

Shield. I chose it because it

Aluminum Siding As Concrete Art, etc.

Xeroxed into a Diploma, symbolizing

matches my eyes. 104 is also

that learning and the key to success

the IQ necessary to be Xeroxed

is being Xeroxed and duplicated

into a Doctorate. You also

replications becomes your tuition

be established concerning the Manifest

Day Adventists, used-car salespersons,

The Sayings of Chairman Meow
illustrates that if you are a tomcat
you spray your way to success, marking

precisely as liberally and as artistically

have to trade your humanity

as the reductions or enlargements of the

for a license to be a rabies

Path of logic to pathology. If you

blankness of a piece of white paper.

babies hunting madly for

are anything else, you let the Yellow

If you're a white woman the

someone to bite. You see?

bar of light passes over you

Or you Nazi? If you can

turn viscous—homocidal because

territory like follow the Yellow Brick

Brick Wall of man's inhumanity to man

afford to go to a prestigious

the stakes of academe are so small—and

no big deal. A man, however, faces

university east, south, west,

destroy feeling for the sake of

one large bump, his greatest

or north of here, you will be

power, disintegrity. Since l's a

Psycho-Sexual crisis, and he is

Xeroxed and enlarged and embossed

hermaphrodite (also spelled Herm Aphro

Xeroxed, but becomes a god in

at the same time. And your

bumping twice over your breasts—

Dike) nobody harms Me for fear

the process. In this case a

genitally correct organs will be bronzed—

l'Il take my pants down and show

Phallus is Xeroxed into Erectus—

just as language the only organ

them everything they are not but who

outside the body will be stainless

the freaks really are in life.

a phallusy (see). But that
phallacy is em Bossed with Power

steal, polysyllabic, and exclusionary.

It's called mooning—both sides

Politics, indicating whoever will rise

As an English teacher born with

of all four phases. I am

to the top will be a Psychopath of the

rabies and a red pen, |

a radical feminist, so I recognize

Old Boys' School, putting cream that

will teach all students from

women can be terrorists too. |

rises to the top in your coffee from the

The Bible of Truth and Scholarship

believe in excellent teaching, publications,

creamatorium in your always erect

which no one comprehends and which

mind. There is no Phallus for all of

is voted and amended by consensus

alike. I'm a hermaphrodite out

us Interruptus. I'm an English teacher,

morality, consensus reality, consensus

for all the gentle men and women

so I was born with rabies and a

justice, consensus prejudice, consinsus

humanity for all students and faculty

body spirits—look at my

red pen in my first. I came out

pathology, which will be voted on

body, hear my words, and

totally Red at birth and turned to

weekly by the majority of psychopaths

shudder in terror at who

who rule. The book I am writing

we label freak and why.

Major Medical; she has four stars.

blue because my obstetrician was

is called The Sayings of Chairman

l am not alone as |

His Storians now call themselves

Meow. I call my self chair

am the Sphinx, a stone poem:

Psycho (tick, tock) His Storians,

man because to stay in power I will

meow. One word says

Psychotic His Storians will control

lie, cheat, steal, play both sides against

everything. I have more than Nine Lives

the Truth. Just like Freud, I am

the middle, speak so nobody understands

because I am desert and ocean

unafreud and jung again like

me and call them stupid, be vicious

the Psychology Department. They teach

only behind backs, be nodding and smiling

alive on fire. The decision

Abnormal and Child Psychology which

all the time performing in the best tradition

to be humane is made every

is why they act like abnormal children

under the milkyway—I am

day of your life.

Nao)
Education

= 34.

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35

LEARN TO EARN'
Pamela Wye Learn to Earn, 1988, pen and ink.
Pamela Wye ta a New York City artist and writer. She moat recently exhibited drawinga in a group exhibition at Emily Sorkin Gallery and writea for ARTS magazine.

Heresies 25

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“I was actually born in Sausalito,” the Kid says. “In
66, on a houseboat. My dad was an artist, called him-

name. He used to go to Volunteers of America and
Goodwill and the Sally Army and get this great stuff
and stick it all together and display it on the beaches.
My mom left him when I was three. She took me,
my older sister, the orange cat, and a vase of peacock
feathers which somebody later told her were bad
luck.”

He pauses. He’s got a paisley bandanna tied
round his wrist and a silver feather hanging from his
ear. He’s stopped me in the hall even though classes
don't start till next week, and I am clearly impatient.
He fiddles with the bandanna and studies my face
with his gray-green eyes. You can’t help but notice
him. The eyes and something prematurely ironic in
his face, they draw you.

o

“Write it down,” I say. He bows and leaves.

H- there the next week. On time. Holding his
printout as though it were a ticket to something magical, something more filled with possibility than I
know this seminar to be. Creative Writing 1. All over
A

the country someone like me is sitting down with
someone like him, one of'us filled with resignation,
the other filled with what must feel like a beginning.
His classmates straggle in. They must have heard
about me. Most of them are on time. And they are
Ci.

looking sharp: B.R. and Esprit and L.A. Kicks and
denim jackets that somebody has washed in a vat of
stones. I can’t quite figure out why the Kid is the
only one with dark hair when the class list holds a
Ramirez and a Yazzie.
They are about to be surprised. They are about to
discover that I don’t have an opinion on the governor and Martin Luther King, that I don’t give a damn
if they saw The Color Purple, and that though my son
is named Bobby and my daughter Angela, I am resigned to living in a decade when the original of the
aforementioned Bobby has been featured in an article in the New York Times Business Section on barbecue magnates. Indeed, I let my hair do its do, and
yes, my butt is big and I refuse to give up dashikis
because they make little of what's big. They are going
to discover that they will call me Ms. and that I am
not particularly eager for them to know my first
Painter, printmaker, and sculptor Nancy Wells has been
seriously involved in making art for the last thirty years. She is
currently teaching teachers to teach art at the School of Visual
Arts and also teaches printmaking at the Bob Blackburn
Printmaking Workshop. She lives and works in Jersey City and
New York City.

Nancy Wells

e. u

o

R & =>

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i ,
`

name, much less use it. It’s all going to be less pre-

the Akita they have named Patrice. They do look

dictable than they might have guessed coming

good. All of them. She reminds me it’s different now.

through that door for the first time—if, in fact, they

When I visit, she takes me to wonderful restaurants `Y

bothered to guess at all.

where they serve black-eyed peas garnished with ci-

The Kid gives me a funny look. “Are you alright?”

lantro and spoonbread hot with chiles. She laughs

he asks, and I safely tuck him away in my E-Z file:

when she tells me that Eldridge has designed a line

this kid is Pure California. Mom’s assertive. There are

of men’s pants.

books lying around the house, which has huge win-

“You will.write,” I say, “for next class on the theme

dows, the windows hung with little stained-glass

of your summer vacation.” The redhead looks wor-

symbols of things hopeful, things mystical, things

ried. Bored writes my words, maybe, down in his

" preached about in the Unitarian Church Mom surely

Life Plan. The Kid laughs.

gm attends. The books have titles that indicate that

“Alright,” he says. “Allllllllright!” s

men do not much like women but that women

I realize that in the excitement I have forgotten to `p g

can do many things about that. The Kid and Mom

take attendance, so I do. The redhead’s name is Rain. : Bored is Toby. The Kid wont tell us his first name. y

were somewhere special on those summer days .
when something was supposed to harmonize or

Must run in the family, that hip coyness. All the print- 9 €

converge.

out says is “Saturn, N.” In addition to these three, .

“I am fine,” I say to all of them and smile my smile

there are two Jennifers, one of whom is dressed from s

that I have learned to do, the one that involves only

>

the lower half of the face, the smile that is cliché

barrette to ankle boots, in sherbet yellow. There are
4

Corey and Chris, Lupe and a Farrah Fawcett look-

and judgment in itself. “And I am Ms. Green and

alike named Debby Yazzie. Steve and Rick and Jon

this is Creative Writing 1, and it is my hope that

and Randy all have perfect haircuts and wear jams in A

we will surprise each other before the end of the

terrible colors. There are two no-shows. I encourage

semester.”

those present to leave early. The Kid hesitates at the Ay

A skinny redhead to the Kid's left raises her hand.

door, checks out the set of my shoulders, and leaves.

I’m afraid she has managed to mismanage her frizzy
hair into dreadlocks. She has even wrapped four lit-

N ext class, the two no-shows show. They've even

p| tle braids with colored yarn. It must have required

done the assignment. One of the no-shows, a tiny

the kind of stoned concentration that only a dedi-

woman in a very large shirt, develops an immediate

cated follower of Jah could sustain. She is wearing a

and obvious case of something for Toby and spends

tie-dyed T-shirt with a skull silk-screened across the

the entire class carefully ignoring him. He is busy
with his Life Plan and a calculator. I read them an

bosom. I can’t bring myself to check her feet, to see
if she’s wearing those thick German sandals that make

early story by Doris Lessing and when I call on him,

everybody’s feet ug-ly. I nod.

he gives me a gorgeous warm smile and says he’s

“Will we read some Third World writers?” she asks.

sorry but he drifted off for a minute.

The silvery-blond young man who’s just come in

The other no-show is dressed all in beige: cotton

the door glances at her, glances at me, smiles care-

shirt and sweater and pants and shoes that have an

` fully, and settles into the desk in the farthest corner

unusual, in my view, number of flaps and snaps and

" of the room. He’s already bored. I can tell because

loops. He himself is also in beige: hair, skin, eyes,

"he pulls out one of those hundred-dollar Daily Life

. eyelashes, even the fine fuzz on his arms. The Kid

Plan books and begins leafing through. The Kid is

stares at him. Those orbs of his, they seem to eat up
everything—hungry, shining, long-lashed, gray-green

_ watching me intently.

“I don’t care what you read,” I say. “I care what

holes in space. He’s got a funny almost-sweet smile,

you write.” She blushes, the pink washing up be-

like he can’t quite believe what he seems to see.

hind her freckles. I pull the first class assignment out

My Angela comes to mind. I remember shopping
with her in Tucson. We’d stuffed ourselves on tama-

of my old briefcase. Angela, my daughter, wishes I
would get rid ofit, the briefcase. She says it’s ostenta-

>

les and were walking in that big airy mall. She

tiously po’ folks. She wishes I would getmy hair cut
_ and buy some new clothes and realize that the old
_ days are nothing but old She’s living in D.C. with
her husband. He’s going to Howard. She sends the |
pictures of the two of them, of their townhouse, of

plunked down on a bench near the fountains and s s
started people-watching. That’s her favorite pastime "|
next to talking trash about what she watches. She . — »
shakes her head as they parade by, the young ladies

v

in aerobics gear, the poor souls in Bermuda shorts, ,

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the college kids who appear to have been computerdrawn and die-cut.

used to brew up to spread on his bony old chest

bench, eyelids drooping, every muscle in her body

è she knew that milk and sugar would make you sleep

when he had the catarrh. I’ve got a big mug of milk
and molasses. She knew that, too. Long before the
scientists and the ladies’ magazines started telling us,

good. A little rum doesn’t hurt. That’s my discovery.
“I’ve got to get me one of those big old gourmet

Milk and molasses for sleep. Rum for the emptiness.

chocolate chip cookies just to stand this mess.” That’s

“Make you sleep good...” Angela says I’m trying

how we are, my child and her mother. Cookies. So-

: to talk down home when I say stuff like that. She’s
never forgiven me for growing up in Evanston, for

ship, of love.

her grandpa being a dentist, for me having no trou-

The Kid taps the beige one on the arm and smiles.

ble getting into a good school, earning a good de-

“David Byrne, I presume?” he asks.
NVs

,

- gree, getting a mediocre job. She keeps wanting to
know about her roots, the real ones. Milk and mo-

“No,” the beige one says nicely. “My name is Mark.
I think you've mistaken me for someone else.”

lasses. Some hymns. Greens and ham hocks with lots

The room has gotten awfully quiet, so I run on for

of black pepper. Remembering my mama’s church

a while about Lessing and how she can make you

clothes, the print dresses, the fine sharp hats, the

feel a place and how they might want to think about

white gloves, the brooch, not gaudy, but real gold
. shining against her shoulder, I tell her about that.

Y B
a A

` And me, that too, standing politely outside the dime

`

treasure in their memory.

store on Fifty-third Street on an August day, that Chi-

“Does it have to be real?” Rain asks.

cago stockyards soot hanging in the wet air, me
dressed in a tasteful skirt and blouse, staying calm,

The Kid is studying me again. I start to move down
the aisle to pick up their work. Rain has woven some

keeping my eyes carefully focused over the custom-

feathers into her braids. She touches them nervously

: ers’ shoulders while they read my sign, while they

as I approach her seat.

walk away or shake my hand or spit at my feet. It

“I’m sorry,” she says in her high little voice. “That

worked. A year later, anybody could buy a bad ham-

was a dumb question. I didn’t think. Really. I'm

burger anytime in an Atlanta lunch counter.
Rain’s handwritten sheets are on the top of

bummed.” She starts to hand me her paper and
ducks her head.

- the pile. She has gone to every Grateful Dead con~ cert in the Southwest in the summer of ’87 and

“If you can make me want to be there, honey,” I

. she wants me to know of the righteous, the totalsignment into the pile in my hand. It’s on nötebook

- ly unbogus vibes of those concerts. She wants me

paper. The child has handwritten it. She has dotted

to know that there are people at those concerts

her i’s with little circles.

who are almost old, there are men with gray braids,
there are Black people and Chicanos. The Dead
let anybody make tapes off their soundboards.
` Twice there were rainbows. Once, at Red Rocks,

surface of the old roll-top desk that takes up most of

it rained right at a part in the song where it talks

the living-dining room. It had been my grandpa’s
F2

s Í,

{ about rain. The Dead want one world...hey, a con-

desk. Some of the cubbyholes still smell like his old

B cert is one world...that’s what they want, like Bob

-

-: Ly

ANU

= Y-

PY

=A

YO v-

ae

4 MAT A M

-

948
A Ut

I LI,

F
p

z š

AN

<

WAO KNOWS HE KNOWS...

BPN —
Nancy Wells

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LAs

o

Marley, Peter Tosh, like all those dudes. Jah!

male hustler or a French sailor or a Manhattan litter (

I add a little more rum to the milk. I don’t want to

-4 box. The word “spike” appears frequently and I can’t å
w tell if it’s slang for syringe or an inadequate male `

grade these things. I correct all the spelling errors.
She’s got the hard ones right, like Rastafarian and

organ. He’s poured ink on some of the sections and L
1 : Y labeled $ the
blotch “random censor.”

Ethiopia and synchronicity. It’s the small words, the
ordinary ones she can't handle. [I start to play with

F -< -< I find myself saying “Have mercy” out loud and {

the punctuation and lose heart. My children’s father,

invoking with the last sip of warm milk, now fumey

Leon, my ex-husband, he had teased me, then nagged
me, and finally gotten so he’d just slip out of the

$ ™ the Kid. with
“See me
I write,ghost
and go
rum,soon,”
the puzzled
of to
my bed.
grandma. I fail /

room when he found me muttering over their poor
papers. It was only one of the ways we had not been

They are puzzled, surprised, disappointed. I

able to keep it—what, keep it kind? I still think of

know how they feel. Writing what have been de-

him nights like this, because at least when I was done,

scribed as “elegant, somewhat detached” essays, I

he had been in there, asleep, his fine-boned body

/

more often than not open an envelope and let a re- {

warming the bed. Uh-uh! I will not give in to that

eut
drop
out
my grandpa’s
now slip
and then
I sit
withonto
my sleeping
potion and desk.
let it And *
Toby has written a cool, tight, tense, polished

rest on my tongue and, even sweeter, let the printed

chrome and enamel, nasty little jewel on Europe on

Page I hold in my hands rest in my mind. “June Jor- _

two hundred dollars a day. He hasn't missed a trick,

S dan Plain Talking” by Antoinette Green. I sleep the

in his travels, in his style. I give him an A-. It'll drive
him crazy. Debby Yazzie starts off slow, then gets me

good sleep of the worker on those nights. So when

3

right there, on her grandma’s ranch, in the dust and
the wind and the mutton broiling on the wood-fire
of it. She’s got a problem with paragraphs—some-

they glance at the last page of their papers and let
their eyes rest briefly on my face, with pleasure, with
7

petulance, I know how it is.
S-

Later they come to my office, that small room with

body taught her to put exactly four sentences in each

no window, that neat room without posters, with-

one—but she gets me to smell the juniper, the dust,

out clues. I sit in the straight-backed library chair and

the rank fat perfume of the mutton. I clean up the

I listen. Toby is charming. He mentions Paris Review

paragraphs and give her a B+.

and his hope of being a successful novella-ist. He

Pv
p

I pull Rain’s paper back out and give her a double

waits for me to appreciate the joke. I smile. He talks

grade: C for writing, B for politics. That'll bring her

vaguely of Ralph Ellison and the tyranny of'print. He

running. If T've got to hold office hours, I may as well

leaves with his A- intact. I’ve brought an apple and f r

teach these kids to debate. Not dialogue. Debate.

taste clean. f .

yogurt for lunch. In the silence, the solitude, they

The others do the predictables: Puerto Penasco,

I smell patchouli. Rain follows her scent. She pulls ' 4

kids’ camp, Volunteer in the Parks, back-packing,
river-running, scooping it out at Baskin Robbins. The

her paper from her peasant bag and sets it on the

Kid’s paper is last. The Kid’s papers. I open the

desk.

TI

stained envelope and a wad of paper cutouts falls

“I wonder,” she says, “like I was kind of bummed, A

out. He’s read Burroughs. He knows Dada. He’s cut

no big deal, really, but hopefully we could talk about ,° A

my grade?” j

up old Patti Smith lyric sheets and thrown in some

Her nails are bitten to the quick and very clean.

early Leroi Jones for good measure. There’s more. If
I read the mess right, he’s spent the summer as a

She tucks her feet a under her and perches on the

T KNOW was SANO y
TEKNOW, KNOW I Ky, 4 NOW, Klo, KNOW

T KNOW
f KNO
EXCUSE Me sip HEN

T KNOW Tiy,

1 KNOW

\WHAT 1S IT you Khouw SW NHAr N KNOWN

a

Tr musr
Be WONDERFUL.

To Kow
vou Kw...

|

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chair. I know that any minute she will hunker for-

“Listen,“ I say. “If you want people to hear, write

ward and hug her knees. I wrap the apple core in
about how you heard, what you heard...not so
winds and leans toward the basket.

much the people on the stage, but the people around

“I can use that for my compost,” she says, “I mean,

you... OK?”

like if you don’t mind?”

“Far out,” she says. She flops the bag on my desk

“No,” I say, “hopefully it'll be good for your gar-

and begins rummaging in it. “Here,” she says, “this

den.” I feel a mean little charge in my gut and sur-

is for you. I got it at Telluride. Purple’s a high healing

prise her and myself by apologizing.

power.” She sets a little amethyst crystal on my desk.

works.” 7

“I'm sorry,” I say. She looks eager and puzzled.

I pick it up and hold it in the fluorescent light.

“Rain,” I say, “you don’t use hopefully that way. You

“Sunlight,” she says. “Natural light, that’s what |

can say ‘I hope’ or ‘one hopes,’ but if you are serious
about this course, you will not use hopefully in that

“It’s pretty,” I say. “Thank you.”

way. Hopefully is an adverb: ‘She said hopefully.’

“Blessed be,” she says, blushes, and leaves. I rub

Something like that.”

the crystal along my temples. It’s not much more
than a small cool smoothness.

She mentions another instructor and points out
that he uses it all the time.

The Kid is next and he’s very carefully carelessly

“He's wrong,” I say and try, again, to tell her why.

beautiful. He’s wearing sleek shades, the mirrored

She gets confused. She’s not real sure what an ad-

kind. He’s got a long tweed coat on over beat-up

j verb is. I realize she has no foundation, and I start to

Levis and a clean clean white, button-down shirt. I

think of language in just that way, as a shelter, as a

have to look away. How he does what he does—put

structure, as a home. I imagine a new essay and for-

that surface together without a flaw—it scares me.

get her for a minute. She pokes around in her big

He’s curled his hair and when he pulls off his shades,

bag and pulls out a bandanna. She wipes her eyes. I

I can see that he’s lined his eyes with indigo pencil.

realize she is crying.

He’s got those rich-bitch fine-ass features that our M

“I’m bummed,” she says. “Tve got so much inside

poor Michael J. has had to carve from his living skin

and I can’t get it out so other people can hear. Like

and bones. There’s a silver moon in the Kid’s left

my mom,” she says, “I go home and I play the Red

ear. Its curved up. My friend, Ramona, once told

Rocks tapes and I try to show her some things I wrote

me her people believed that kind of moon was a

about them, about the Dead. I mean, she’s your age,

sign of withholding.

right, so she was my age when they were starting.

“I didn’t expect you'd deal in success or failure,”

And all she can talk about is how I should shave my

he says.

legs and that if T took off all my earrings but one pair

“You’re too damn young to be so damn hip,” I

I'd look so nice. So, I go—.”

say quietly.

I hold up my hand.

“Who judges?” he says quickly. “I like to shatter

“Stop,” I say. “In the first place, you don’t ‘go,’ you

things.”

‘say.’ In the second, you and your mom are not my

“Honey,” I say, “you've got to make before you
break.”

business.”
“Oh,”. she says. “I'm sorry.” She starts to get up.

“I didn’t sign on for political theory,” he says and

“Wait,” I say. She hefis the bag to her shoulder and

smiles. “But, Ms. Green, while we’re at it, what are

wobbles a little from the weight. Compost, I imagine.

yours?”

PLEASE se... Tell me WHAT Yov Khóa,

GOOD HEAVENS... ALL YOU EVER SA |s
T KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW
ARENT YoU TIRED oF

T feel scared because I don Know, Vou,

LISTENING TO YOURSELF...

Yov kow you KNOW...

reuME... WHAT DO YOL KNaw 7 a

Mg

oW

TK £ NE know T KNOW Tp
W
A TT KNOW
Vow
KNO
KNOW
OW

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“A,” I say. “And I am Ms. Green, and this is office
hours for Creative Writing 1.”

FHARARRIEITEI
He’s staring at a page in the magazine. “Can I borrow this?” he asks. His voice is thick. When he looks

“A for anarchy?” he persists.

up, his eyes are trancey.
“Be careful,” I say.

VS

this...and I'm getting bored.”
I watch him shape himself back into what he thinks

Rain misses the next class. The Kid hands in his
rewrite and the new assignment in that same stained

him. It’s bitter and piney and somehow comforting.

envelope. I feel a little lump in the package. That

vM

“It’s juniper smoke,” he says. “I got smudged before I came here.”

night, as I take out his work, a sprig of dry sage falls
out. I crush it between my fingers and rub the oils

“Are you Indian?” I ask.

into my wrists, along my temple. I can smell a place

“No,” he laughs. “But I might wannabe.”

I’d like to know. I’m a little surprised when I see that
the accompanying pages are blank. I take up there-

old days; rootless white kids; middle-aged lefi-wing

write with the sage scent plain and strong in the air.

politicos who wannabe—you can find them at Big

“In the pines out behind my mom’s house,” the

Mountain rallies, up on the Mesas at the dances. Navajo, Hopi, Yaqui, that’s what they wannabe. Usetabe
me they’d wannabe. Back in ’61, back in SNCC, in

ning so that suddenly I'm walking through flowers.
A moment before, a moment after, there’s only a
different light and dry grasses.”

girls in cotton shifis, the boys in overalls, the ones
who said “Right on” and “yo mama” and learned to

I give him an A for the work. I fail the blank pages
and give him an A+ for the sage.

signify, I wonder where they are.
“Well, you ain’t,” I say. “You are what we refer to
these days as a son of the dominant culture. How’d
you find out about Burroughs?”

"T'he days later the Kid stops me after a graduate
seminar and asks if we can talk.
“TIl listen,” I say. We go to my office and he waits

“He was a friend of'a friend of my dad’s,” he says.

politely till I'm settled in. Then he slaps the maga-

I know he’s lying. “Whatever,” I say. “Cut-up ain’t

zine down on the desk and just looks at me. He’s

nothin’ but t.p. to me,” I say. “What are we going to

drawn a tiny silver star on his left cheekbone. It’s

do about this?”

terrific against his olive skin. It works like a TV screen

“I'll write something different,” he says. He looks
down. There’s a copy of an international literary

in a gloomy bar; my eyes are pulled back to it, again
and again.
“This stuff is true?” he says.

graphs so technically perfect that they seem to float
up off'the page and monstrous stories of people who

“Yes,” 1 say.

“They would really take a person and shove, you

disappear and those who disappear them. I’m re-

know...a boiling hot rock up their ass? They would

viewing something for the magazine, a book on

do that?” he asks.

South Africa, on women—a country far removed
from me, a sex I’ve come to believe I barely know.
“Is this the kind of stuff you read?” the Kid asks.
“Sometimes,” I say. I check my watch. “Time to

“And more,” I say.
“OK,” he says. “How did I miss all this? I read. I
watch TV My mom’s real aware of things.”
“Who would want to know about it?” I ask.

close up shop,” I say and nod at the door.

Bur
TMNotT EN
NEVER

w WHAT HE 3AYs HE KNows.... .
am boen
Frem

40O WHO CARES IF T DONT KNOW T KNAW.,

3aying

TKnow
IKnow...

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I hand him a pamphlet on Chile, on the Mothers.

knows my'ups and downs, so she calls and we talk

One of their finest journalists, now dead, wrote it.

for two hours. Later I wonder if I'm having one of

Someone here, a woman who has lefi that country,

those midlife crises people are getting rich writing

translated it. The Kid thanks me and leaves his sec-

about.

ond rewrite on my desk. When I finish, I truly want
to be there, on that north California coastline. I want
to see the Great Blue Heron. I want to smell the salt
and pine of the air.

Nobody comes in during office hours. The mail is
a joy. U. of New Mexico Press wants to publish a small
collection of my essays on barely known women
writers of color. Harper’s buys a short piece. There is

A few classes later, we are starting to get to know

an invitation from my chairman to come in and dis-

each other. None of'them has withdrawn. They have

cuss a few things. I lock up and head down the hall.

turned in their poorest, their OK, their on-the-wayto-good, and their surprising work on how it might
be to be a visitor in a foreign country where one
could not speak the language and where one was
immediately identifiable as a stranger. Jon, one of

He is free. He smiles, offers me sherry, and tells
me he’s delighted to hear my news, because, frankly,
g he has become concerned about my failure to make
certain linkages between teaching and publication.
It appears that my priorities are skewed. I dare not

the jams boys, wrote about visiting the girl’s locker

drink the sherry or I will have to ask him in a plainly

room. They have begun to critique each other, to be

nasty way what the hell a “linkage” is. They all talk

very harsh or silent, to say what they would like to

like that these days, not just the education faculty.

hear, and, sometimes, to say what I could not.
Debby Yazzie has tapped on my office door, that

I meet Margot for lunch to celebrate New Mexico

door being wide open, she being unable to raise her

and Harper’s. I bitch clear through her Chardonnay

eyes to meet mine, which I understand. A century

and soda, my rum and Coke, both our salads, and

ago I might have been seen by her people as some

the chocolate suicide we split. I tell her about Ange-

kind of witch, possibly one of those who is so dread-

la’s diagnosis. She laughs.

ful that its name is not spoken. She wants to know if

“Julie tells me the same thing,” she says. Julie is

I ever read Ntozake Shange’s for colored girls who have

. her twenty-year-old going-on-ancient daughter, who

considered suicide/when the rainbow is enuf, and she

- lives in Seattle and knows about securities and pork

wonders if I know that it isn’t so different sometimes

' bellies and Ginny Maes. She’s on two phones eight

for girls of her background. She tells me her favorite -

hours a day and in the company library six more.

sister has gone East to school and that her professor,

She tells Margot she’s too busy for a man, but that

a Japanese woman born in California, had suggested

Margot, being advanced in years, has the luxury of

the book. I have to smile. So does she.
“You know about the eyes?” she asks cautiously.
“We were slaves,” I say. “Different danger, same
gateway.”

kicking back and “drawing in” the right one. She,
like Angela, believes we draw in the events and
people in our lives; draw in negative and, uh uh!
draw in positive—well, my my my! I think living
with the threat of nuclear annihilation has softened

“A ngeh" I write about halfway through the sem-

their brains.

ester. “Help me, child, I am intolerant as our good

“I got to start drawing in those positive men,” I

. Governor. I look at most of the white kids’ papers

say to Margot, “all those smart, healthy, horny, avail-

and all I can see is weak sentences and bad spelling
and arrogance and can’t think and don’t give a damn.
One writes this thin stuff about perfect people in

able middle-aged Black men.”
“Are there any?” Margot asks.
“I believe they are out there in the astral plane

perfect marriages with perfect children who suddenly

somewhere... just waiting on us positive women...

have a DISASTER! and prevail perfectly. Another one

along with all the smart, etc. white guys,” I say.

writes fairy tales. This young man, the clone with the

That’s when we order chocolate suicide and two

perfect bone structure, keeps writing this obscene

spoons. Draw in positive and you get chocolate sui-

elegant mess about cocaine and cars and pussy. I can’t

cide and two not-too-bad-lookin’ women laughing

tell most of the rest of them apart.

and a lunch check for thirty dollars.

“I am a failure of compassion.”
“You need a man,” she writes back. “Swear to God,
Mama, you truly need a man. It’s been eight years.”
Pm so mad I send a telegram. “Like hell I do.” She

Tha night when the phone rings I almost don’t
answer it. It is the Kid. His voice sounds funny. At first
I think he’s high and start to tell him that Ms. Green l

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P -- and Creative Writing 1 do not exist for students mess-

something wet and good-smelling, telling me to

ing with drugs.

hush, calling me child.

“Something happened to the beige one,” he says,
“to Mark.” I realize he’s absolutely sober.

T hare’ a hole in the seminar. You can’t miss it,

“What?” I ask.

and you can’t say a thing about it, especially me. We’re

“He jumped out of the ninth floor of the math

rolling on toward the last few classes. The Kid is writ-

tower,” he says.
It happens about twice a year at this school. I stare
up at the ceiling. “Do Lord,” I say before I can stop
myself. I suddenly wish I had white gloves and good

ing about the early days, about the smell off'the Bay
and the new people who began to move in and the
divorce and split custody and always being the new
kid in class. Rain is dotting her i’s with dots. Toby
has ceased to remind me of an oil slick under a
Jaguar-XKE. Every image I arrive at for him is a sleek

R hear the Kid make some muffled noise.

cliché, and I give up, wondering if that failure isn’t

“Pm here,” | say

the definition. I think once of The Shining. I imagine

“We went for coffee a couple times,” the Kid says.

him peeking around the classroom door, his perfect

J “No big deal, I think we were curious about each
B other. I used to tease him and he got so he'd tease
I back. He’d been so tight, so safe. I played one of the

hair a mess, his gorgeous face grotesque, him whispeering, ‘“Heeeeceeere’s Toby!”
Debby Yazzie comes to my office and walks right

early Talking Heads tapes for him once. He liked it. I
“It’s called ‘The Lady in Turquoise,” she says. “I |
the joke.”
“Listen,” I say, “I don’t mean to be cold, but there’s
nothing left to do...if there ever was anything.”

was thinking about sending it to her, to that Shange
woman. I wanted you to read it first.”
“TIl read it,” I say. “But go ahead and sendit. I bet |
she gets lonely out there.”
“Alright!” she says and pauses. She’s looking at me

i Some feeling starts to crawl toward the surface. I notice the phone is slippery in my hand.

like she’s measuring me for something.
“Listen,” she says. “Ifyou want to try some of our

“Write about it,” I say. “Tve got to go.”

food, there’s a restaurant up near that old grade

“Wait,” he says. “I knew you’d say that. That’s all

school. You could go there.” She says the next part

there is to do, really, isn’t there? I’ve been reading
i those plays you gave me about South Africa. I thought
it was all some nice safe liberal hands-linked-in-front| ofthe-embassy deal. It’s not, right? It’s about people

quickly. “A lot of the neighborhood people do.
Doesn't matter, you know!”
“TIl do that,” I say. “When I used to live up north,
I used to go out to Gray Mountain.”

| being trapped, right? People being killed by some] thing that sucks the air out of them?”
“Write about it,” I say. “Like that. That’s all I’ve got
to give you.”
After I hang up the phone I start to think about
chocolate suicide. I don’t mean to, but the phrase
keeps coming back and back and then I start to laugh
and then to cry. I’ve been working on an article on
linear plotting vs./and flashback. I shut off the type-

Ste smiles. I see clearly how beautiful she is, in her q
torn Motley Crue T-shirt, with the lean flawless line
of her perfect belly visible, with the three woven Guatemalan bracelets on her wrist, with her hair bleached
and permed into that early ‘80s flip the girls on the
Res seem to love. She unties one of the bracelets
and hands it to me. We tie it around my wrist.
“Till it falls off, right?” I ask.

writer and slip an old tape into the deck. The mech-

“For friendship,” she says. “I may have to miss the

anism lurches and Aretha Franklin’s voice, the young

last class. My grandma might need me up there. She’s

Aretha Franklin’s voice finishes me off. I flop on the

getting really old.” She giggles. “She’s so little,” she

couch and let those damn tears run down the sides

says. “Her head comes to my shoulder.”

of my face.

“Bridge over troubled waters...”
I asked for this. I'm crying so hard my chest hurts.
My nose is running and I can hardly breathe. IfI had
] the Kid’s number Id call him back but I don*t, so I

“My grandma’s too,” I say. I think of that small,
proper, fierce woman.
Debby reaches out her hand. “I want you to know
I learned a lot,” she says. We shake. Her grip is gentle
as a`child’s.

just lie on the damp couch cushion and imagine my
grandma sitting in the room, wiping my face with

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their last assignment. It is also their final. It will count
for half their grade. Pastel Jennifer raises her hand.

in front of her and says, “I have a problem and I

“Is that fair, do you think?” she asks.

wonder if maybe you could help me?” She smiles a

“Yes; 1say.

genuinely wistful smile.

“Well, why?” she says.
“Because I am Ms. Green and this is Creative Writing 1 and you are taking it.”
“Well,” she says, “I can see why you would say

“Hopefully,” I say and, for the first time in the semester, I hear her laugh. It’s good laugh, straight up
from her chest. The bells chime along. She takes a
deep breath, closes her ginger eyes and gets serious.

that, but you know, you work real hard on a class or

“My old man left me,” she says and suddenly be-

something and you really try to get something out of

gins to sob. “Don’t worry,” she says, “it’s good to cry

it. I mean, you do your best, you know, like you

like this, to let your feelings out. It clears the fourth

really care a lot about the assignments and your grade,

chakra.”

and everything, and it seems you ought to get something out of all of that that’s really fair.”

I hand her a tissue. I wonder how they get out of
bed in the morning and find their way here, these

“Ido,” 1 say.

kids who live in this maze of teachings. I watch her

“No,” she says. She is blushing behind her blusher.

rub her eyes.

“I mean'me.”
Rain is nodding her dreads vigorously. The Kid
looks at me and shakes his head. “That’s cold, Ms.
Green,” he says.

“Really,” she says, “It’s OK. Besides, I drew him in,
you know, and everything that happens works out.”
I see that it isn’t even teaching, it’s a cheerful chaos `
of beginnings of teachings. And the others, the ones

“True,” I say. “However, when one uses ‘you’ for

who believe that they know exactly where they'll be

‘me,’ I stop listening. I get bored. I don’t like to be

in ten years, the ones with the Life Plans, the ones

bored, OK?”

who look burnished, I cannot bear to think of'them.

I hate myself for that “OK?” and the Kid knows it.

“Your father lefi?” I ask, though I know better.
“No,” she whispers, “Miguel, my old man. He

He grins.

“Jennifer,” I say. “Come and see me. I won’t change

went back to his old old lady. It’s not him. It’s me. I
don’t know how to let go.” She starts to sob again.

just did.”
“OK,” she says and makes it almost a question.
“Rain,” I say. I think I am going to firmly suggest
is the standard one. I want them to write a short
story, nọ more than twenty pages, no less than ten.

take a hot bath, meditate, and listen to the Dead, but

That’s all, except that I want it to be of content and

I don*t. I say, “I know how it is.”

quality. If they don’t know what I mean, it’s too late.

“You do?” she says, and I realize she cannot imagine how one as hefty and middle-aged as I could

J ennifer never makes it to my office, but Rain does.

know about any of this.

She’s tucked her dreads up into a knit tam’o’shanter.

“Yes,” I say. “It’s happened more than once. I hate

It’s red and black and green, and I can hardly stand

it every time, except that I usually lose a few pounds.

to look at it and her pale face, woebegone and hope-

It'll probably happen again.”

ful, beneath it.
“I don’t know if you can help me with this?” she

“What did you do?” she asks. “Like, how did you
let him go?”

says and perches on the chair. She pulls off her tam

“I drank,” I say. “I lived on yogurt till I could start

and her hair tumbles stiffly down around her shoul-

eating too much again. Chocolate. Work. Once I

ders. She’s strung some tiny bells in her braids. I wait

moved two thousand miles. I don’t recommend any

for the sound to fade.

of those options.”

“That carries our prayers,” she says firmly.
“I never heard that one,” I say.
“It’s Tibetan,” she says. “We’re all métis,” she says,
“mixed, you know. Like, we suffer the same, we pray
the same.”
“What if I reject that?” I ask and wish I hadn*t. I
know what comes next and it does.
“No problem,” she says calmly. “It just is.”

“But,” her voice rises to a wail, “how did you stand
10

“I waited for time to pass,” I say. “And I wrote
aboutit”
She takes a green crystal from her pocket and rubs
it on the place where I can see her heart pulse in her
throat. “Sometimes this helps,” she says. She hands
it to me and I rub it over my throat. It feels good,

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made for heart troubles—not for the physical kind:
for the man-woman kind. She died before she taught

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it to me.”

lal

Rain tucks the crystal back in her purse. When she =
closes the bag, a puff of air carries the scent of old

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leather and patchouli and herbs.

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“My mom takes Valium,” she says and giggles.
“Different strokes...” I say.
svt

“Well, hopefully...” She grins.
“Write about it,” I say. “Content and quality.”
“Did you really drink?” she asks.
wV;

“I still do,” I say. “Rum and warm milk. Almost
like medicine.”
“Well, like, I don’t want to butt in,” she says, “but

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you should try ganja. We believe that alcohol harms

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the physical envelope.” She unwinds from the chair

syi

and stretches. Under the layers of clothing and scarves
and sashes, her body is lovely. She tucks her dreads
up into her cap.
“Ms. Green,” she says, “can I ask you something
personal?”
“You can ask,” I say.
“What’s your first name? I mean like if it isn’t se-

U
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cret or ritual, you know, or something like that. I’d
just like to know. I mean, what you told me today, it
was more like we were friends.
“Antoinette,” I say. “Tony, sometimes.” She leans

>T

down, kisses me on the cheek and is gone.

TAA IZRIASA SAN

z e last class is a long one. I ask them to read
~ twenty minutes of their story. I time them. I cannot
> believe how slow the minute hand moves. I don’t
: want to feel this way. By the time the Kid stands in
2 front of the class to read, the setting sun gilds the
~

room. The Kid is wearing a silver dragon on a chain.

,

"` In its claws an opal burns. I have grown numb with
%'

` words. The opal draws my eye. It is an old one. It is
3 fiery and deep, not like the new pale stones built
a from layers ofinferior mineral. The Kid touches the
s dragon once and begins to read.
4 “My name is Mark and sometimes people mis. take me for David Byrne...”
l The Kid's voice shakes. I have watched him grow
] ashen through the other readings, as though the
| `: barrage of words were shrapnel, as though he
| — bled. I wonder if the others see that. Debby Yaz-

a A Ee A
Nancy Wells The Beginning of an Extraordinary Friendsh
crayons on vinyl, 27⁄2"x35".

zie is gone. I read her work. They seemed to be

í íi

bored by it. Their themes frighten me. Each year it
has gotten worse. At the end of his twenty minip, 1989, watercolor

utes, the Kid has let us begin to be curious about
Mark. The sunset is fading. The opal has gone

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UN FENIAN
RAINS ‫اا ا‬RL‫ا‬

RA FU

7 0 NNER

5 UO 0

‫ااا‬

e Ê MH 0 ‫ ا‬18 ۱

flat, like one of the newer, 0 OnEs. 1 ‫ ن‬N 7
“Thank you,” I say, and the Kid nods. The others

look up at me. I thank them. All of us realize we are MIAN U
| their things. Rain wipes her eyes with her sleeve. I

‫ ا‬9
‫ا‬LN
0

not going to ‫ ن‬the work. They begin to pack ® ۱ i

start down the aisle to collect their papers and see f 0

the Kid rise up to meet me. His fine-boned face is

swollen and red. He slams his paper down on his _
; desk and brushes past me. I hear him stop. Even Ji

Toby looks up. N

RDN wl 1

N E



The Kid starts to cry. He’s gasping a little. He can’t ‫ا‬
get his breath to speak. “Do you know?!” he asks.

RR RN
۱ “Do you
have even one idea of what they write about

1 5 H3 0 ‫ ا‬in other countries?” He points to Jennifer. She gig- ۹

‫ و‬1 1 A 7 HHL ۱ gles, then starts to cry. He points to Corey and Steve ‫ا‬

0 EO ۱ 11 and Jon. Jon says, “Oh maaaaan, lighten up!” The ۹ : 1
1 A Kid points to Toby and repeats the question. 3 ‫ا‬

‫ ن‬194
“Do you
have
one
TAI
i ۱ AMARA
about in
other even
countries?

‫ااا‬
O

idea of what they wa ۱

holds his stance. “Tell me,” he says.

100‫ا‬
e0R
‫ ا‬0 {R0

The Kid’s arm drops. In silence the students file ۳
‫ ا‬out. Jennifer touches the Kid gently on the shoulder. 0N 1 ‫ن‬

1 room. We each gather up our papers and pens and ٨

۱ 7 7 LER 1 HAR various packs and bags and briefcase. The Kid is a RIAN NONNRY ‫ا‬

1 4 these small ways to putys things
Rain moves be- ۱
to p gS ng right.
۳ 7 RAG ۸ ۱ A little wild-eyed, but he moves with grace through ‫ ا‬IR
1 ‫ ل‬0 6 IA tween the Kid and me.

‫ س‬0 6 1 “Nick, Tony,” she says in a clear voice, “Miguel left ‫ ا‬۳
3. 5 i 0 some chocolate behind, some beautiful Mexican M0
lhe 0 6 LG A 0 i۴ Ê chocolate with cinnamon in it. I know how to make 1 ۱ ‫ب‬

EA 1 NEC it. He showed me. I could make up some. Would ‫ ا‬1 ۱ 1

iA ‫نۇ‬
RN I come
smileto my
at room?”
her. 11

E 9E 00 0 you
NCR
yA :

HR nN RL) 4 “OK,” she says, “Yowll love it. It's not like Quik Bf . ‫ا‬

va! dipa ‫ م‬at all.” 0 e

A: LI “Nick,” I say. “So that’s your name.” I turn back to 1 9

7 ‫ ا‬۲ A 4 Rain. “And yours?” Task. “Is it Rain?’ [1

| HRN TN 0 ‫“ ل‬My name is Linda,” she says. She touches the back a
| ‫ ناااا‬N5 f ٧٣ Kt ‫ ن‬of my hand. She touches Nick.

A Ep 0 0 N ‫ ا‬she says. “Please. I'm glad to have you 0

۳ ١ ‫ ن‬1 6 1 visit.” I's gone dark, and we stand in the dim room |}!

۱ a minute. Nick shakes his head as an animal 2 J

1 ۳ ‫ ا‬off pain. And then, together, we go out. * ۱ ‫ا‬

۱ 1 ۱ ‫ ا‬0 ٍ ‫ ا‬۱ WRN Mary Sojourner is the author of Sisters of the Dream (North- 1 ۲

‫ا‬

١ A i!

E. 0 ۸e hi

TTR

TRINA
5
3 , 3

O 1

ERIN arl RN

Going Through
Ghosts, and knows
that we are indeed
Métis.
1 0 ۱ land
Publishing,
Flagstaff,
Ariz.),
is working on a new novel, He 1 ۹۹ ‫ ا‬١ ‫٭‬

۲Cede
4 RMEL
71
RE OSE 0 7 E RR

۱

- ‫ ےس‬7

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Тһе Вгаї гот Вемейу Ні
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When Yeoun Jae Kang interviewed me in late 1988 I

them to discuss their lives and their art freely. Thirdly,
we hope to make a “sampler” videotape with some of

was a junior majoring in art history at Mills College in

these artists, which would make them more readily accessible to curators, collectors, and critics.
Since no one seemed to have done much research

Oakland, California. As co-director of the Mills Col-

before on this subject, I didn't know quite how to go
about finding material. Moira Roth handed me a stack

lege Asian-American Women’s Art Research Project, I

of general articles on women artists of color and organizations. We talked at length about the problems |

work with Moira Roth, the project’s other director.

might encounter and how to deal with them. She suggested that | contact Margo Machida, a New York artist
who was also collecting material on this subject. Margo

Professor Roth, a feminist art historian and head of

had a list of some twenty artists and organizations. So |
began. | started contacting as many local Asian com-

the art department at Mills College, devises projects

munity organizations as | could locate in order to ask
for names. Mostly through word of mouth, | quickly
began collecting names of West Coast Asian-American

that teach students the how and why of finding the

women artists. Currently I have collected over seventy
names, and we have begun to contact them for material.

missing threads of our country’s artistic fabric. Speci-

I had to learn effective phone skills—how to talk to
people concisely while creating an interest in my proj-

fically, we are working on this project to direct the

ect. While it may seem trivial, it was quite necessary to
buy an answering machine to handle the phone messages. Many times | wished | had a full-time secretary

campus toward becoming a center for research on

to handle the mail and phones. Organization is key. |
set up a filing system for the artists with articles and

multicultural women’s art.

exhibition catalogs. I began to use a computer to store

YJK: How did you go about the research?

and update information and to print out correspon-

DA: There are many aspects to this research project.

dence to organizations and artists.

The first task was to collect material: lists of names and

YJK: What have you learned so far from your research?

addresses, articles, and literature on the artists and

DA: The first thing I realized was the terrible dearth of

slides of their work (which we intend to house in the

information on Asian-American artists in general and

Mills slide library for future reference). Secondly, we

the lack of a functional network system among them.

have begun to conduct interviews with certain artists.

The absence of scholarship on the subject of Asian-

To conduct a good interview requires thinking on sev-

American artists may explain the lack of a network sys-

eral levels at once: Is the tape recorder still working?

tem. They are a fragmented group: Some Asian-Ameri-

What should I ask her next? What did she just say that

can artists work solely within the Asian communities,

seemed significant? Most importantly, trust and rap-

while others work primarily in mainstream art venues

port with the artists must be established in order for

without much contact with other Asian-American artists.
The Art of

Education

== S50

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Tomie Arai Women's Wheel, 1989, mixed
media, 12"x12". Photo: D. James Dee.

How and Why To Research the Work of

Asian-American Women Artists
DAWN AOTANI

Secondly, while I knew there would be diversity within
the Asian-American experience, | wasn't aware of the
specific aspects that | needed to consider in my research, such as whether the artists were Americanborn or had immigrated as children or adults.
Thirdly, the term “Asian-American” is so broad. There

Asian heritage and the degree of assimilation determine different needs, expectations, and experiences.

the boundaries with regard to medium. For example,
in addition to the standard “high art” forms, such as
painting and sculpture, | have come across several

are significantly different groups of Asian-Americans:

Japanese-American women artists working in textile

Japanese-Americans, Chinese-Americans, Vietnamese-

and ceramics. Textile art, such as fiber and weaving,

Americans, Korean-Americans, and so on. I had to

and ceramics, which have deep historical roots in Jap-

focus on the context of each Asian-American artist: her

51 —

Fourthly, I had to reevaluate what | considered to be

anese culture, have often been written off in the West

specific cultural heritage and her family’s circumstances

as merely “craft.” It is easier nowadays to argue for

as well as her personal history. Essentially, the type of

these “crafts” as legitimate art forms because of the

Heresies 25

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efforts made by American feminists in the 1970s on
behalf of this country’s quilts and folk arts.
Finally, I realize that research in this subject must be

need to be on the walls and within the administration.
First, for social and political reasons, the art should be
representative of the public. “Minorities” are an increas-

continued. The primary goal of this project is that it

ingly significant part of the population of the United

should act as a catalyst for further inquiry. This project

States. In the case of the San Francisco area, whites

is not an end in itself but rather a beginning. It’s excit-

now make up less than 50 percent of the population.

ing right now, however, because | am connecting with

(Therefore, the term “minority” now seems inappropri-

people who have heard about the project and want

ate.) Second, simply based on its quality, this art should

lists or want to suggest more names. It's beginning to

be shown.

function as a much-needed network system, and | plan
soon to publish (in some modest form) an AsianAmerican women artists; newsletter. It would be interesting to see these artists create a support system
among themselves and to see the results of such a
support system.

YJK: What are your personal reasons for doing the
project?

DA: Mostly it's my own way of understanding myself.
I am Asian-American and a woman interested in the
arts. | find it significant that | was raised in Hawaii, because Asians are far from being the minority there; we

YJK: Could you talk specifically about the situation of
contemporary Asian-American art?
DA: There is a tendency for financial and critical support to be given to traditional Asian arts over contemporary Asian-American art. This tendency suggests a
stereotype of a “pure” Asian form, that one is either
Asian or American, two separate identities. This situation is reflective of a larger problem with stereotypes in
this country. Financial and critical support needs
to extend out to encompass contemporary AsianAmerican artists; this would then help validate the
voices of Asians who are Americans. Asian-Americans
are not simply Asian nor are they apple-pie American,

are in fact the majority. Consequently | never considered myself as a minority. So when | came to the mainland for college, I was shocked by racial stereotypes. |
was fearful of believing in them and felt it necessary
to prove them wrong. My interest in art led me in search

of Asian-American women artists, who became role
models for me and whose work provided me with many
insights into our particular cultural experience. Essentially, however, | began thinking about all this in 1984,
while still in Hawaii, when | wrote a senior paper, “Assimilation of the Asian-American Female,” based on
Maxine Hong Kingston’s novel 7he Woman Warrior,
which was my first introduction to an Asian-American
woman's voice.

but to varying degrees they are a blend of both cultures;
they can never ignore one or the other. Then there is
the problem of the stereotype of “the Asian-American.”
For example, in professional and educational spheres,
there is the stereotype that Asian-Americans excel only
in math and sciences. Well, what about those AsianAmericans who are interested in the arts?

In late 1987 I found this touching passage by Alice
Walker, which tells of her search for the unmarked grave
of Zora Neale Hurston. Hurston was a major black
woman writer who died unrecognized and whose beautiful work and life influenced Walker greatly.

We are a people. A people do not throw their geniuses away. And if
they are thrown away, it is our duty as artists and as witnesses for the

YJK: What is the general current situation of support,

future to collect them again for the sake of our children, and, if neces-

financial and critical, for women artists of color?

sary, bone by bone.

DA: Public money in support of the arts tends to go to

(Alice Walker, /n Search of Our Mother's Gardens, [New York: Harcourt

those organizations that support predominantly white

Brace Jovanovich, 1983.1)

male artists. When financial and critical support is given

For me, there was something very inspirational in Alice

to artists other than white male artists, it is usually given

Walker's determined efforts to validate the achievements

to white women and/or male nonwhite artists. So here,

and existence of another black woman writer. | want to

with women artists of color, we have a situation of a

do the same for Asian-American women artists: to find

double minority status; consequently they tend to be

these women and publish their voices. X

overlooked a great deal. In general, the problem with
color or ethnic diversity in museums includes not only
the color of the artists but also that of the administrative
staff. There are several reasons why more “minorities”

Dawn Aotani was born in Honolulu, Hawaii, in 1965. She
recently graduated from Mills College in Oakland, California,
with a B.A. in art history.

The Art of

Education

— 52

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S O M E
Women, Art,
and Cross-

Cultural Issues

day with a slide blitz of work by women

paper strips surrounding the fountain

of color (and by a few white women who

that is the core of the campus. Two big

had really thought about the issues); then

dice floated in the water, and the board

we discussed readings or films and vid-

game’s squares dealt in words and im-

eos seen. Each student was required to

ages with race, sex, and other social is-

write three letters: first, to herself, ex-

sues in the context of events at and

For a seminar called “Women, Art, and

plaining who she was from a cultural

around the university. A videotape was

Cross-Cultural Issues” taught for one se-

viewpoint and what her experiences

made of the event.

mester in 1989 at the University of Colo-

around race and culture had been; sec-

rado in Boulder, I had to make my own

ond, to an artist whose work I had

(huge) reader of articles, artists’ state-

shown, kind of an imaginary studio in-

organized in Boulder for two years (and

ments, and catalogue texts because there

terview; third, to her granddaughter, who

intend to continue). It’s called “Mixing

were virtually no texts that dealt with

might be of a different or mixed race.

these issues together. The required books

The final requirement was to execute,

artists of color—an African-American, an

were Heresies “Third World Women” and

collaboratively, an activist project on cam-

Asian-American, a Latina, and a Native

“Racism Is the Issue” (nos. 4 and 8, 1978

pus, to take the issues we had discussed

American —to make a small exhibition;

LUCY R. LIPPARD

and 1979); Autobiography: In Her Own

out ofthe classroom and into the broader

Finally, one student group worked
with me on a two-day symposium I have

It Up” and brings to campus four women

speak; do workshops; radio and video
interviews; interact with students in and

Image (the catalogue of'a traveling show

community. One group “seeded” bath-

curated by Howardena Pindell that orig-

rooms in various departments with

out of studios; and generally provide

inated at INTAR, New York City); and the

graffiti about racism and sexism and then

voices rarely heard on this campus. (In

two issues of Cultural Critique (nos. 6

recorded the “responses.” Another did

1988 the artists were Beverly Buchanan,

a piece on index cards mixed with the

Amalia Mesa-Bains, Yong Soon Min, and

and 7, 1987) that focused on “The Nature and Context of Minority Discourse.”
The class was too big (twenty-five) to
conduct as a seminar, so I started each

usual fare on the Student Union bulletin

Jaune Quick-To-See Smith; in 1989, Judy

board. The most ambitious project was

Baca, Robbie McCauley, Jolene Rickard,

a huge “monopoly game” on brown

and May Sun.) These personal informal
encounters were probably more effective than anything I did in class. X
Lucy R. Lippard is a writer and activist who lives
in New York and Boulder, Colorado. She recently
completed a book for Pantheon called Mixed
Blessings.

Aesthetic Questions
RUTH BASS & MARSHA CUMMINS
Aesthetic questions were used to structure an interdisciplinary course in aesthetics developed by several Bronx Community College faculty members with
the support ofa grant from the National
Endowment for the Humanities. The
course was structured around three
major questions: Are truth and beauty
synonymous? Does art reflect or influence society? To what extent does order
or chaos in art reflect human nature? The
questions, each of which was framed
with three subquestions, were discussed
in relation to works of art, architecture,
music, poetry, dance, drama, and aesthetic theories.
Sara Pasti

The format of using questions rather

sT S919339 H

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S O M E
than topic headings makes clear to students that there are many points of view

ties fellow in The Community Colleges Project

public relations department. The assign-

under a grant from the Andrew W. Mellon

ment read:

Foundation.

—not necessarily a single “correct”

“This year marks the 100th anniversary
ofthe Aunt Jemima trademark and de-

one—and makes for lively discussions.
Marsha Cummins, Ph.D., has been a professor

The course has been given three times
and is currently being revised.
Following is a sample of questions, artists, and theoretical writings to think

of English at Bronx Community College since
1971. She is extremely involved with the Writing
Across the Curriculum movement, which arose

Milling Company packaged flour, the
first ready-made mix of any kind ever

out of a need for greater literacy, fluency, and
comprehension in a nonwriting age.

about:

Can/should artists record the world

sign, formulated by two men in Saint
Joseph, Missouri, to market their Davis

developed. Their fictive character of
Aunt Jemima has become the most te-

nacious of ethnic stereotypes. Write a
short (approximately five-page) paper

African America:

in which you consider the social, economic, and historical factors that ac-

Theoretical works: Plato, The Republic;

Images, Ideas, and

count for the origins and persistence

Susan Sontag, On Photography; José Or-

Realities

of everyday experience?

tega y Gasset, “Esthetics on the Streetcar” in Phenomenology and Art; John
Dewey, Art As Experience: The Mustard
Seed Garden Manual of Painting.

EVA GRUDIN

Modersohn-Becker, Pablo Picasso, Marie

compare the four changing images of
plain why the images change in the way

they do. Consider, too, what in the
Eva Gruðdin teaches African, European, and
African-American art at Williams College in
Massachusetts. She mounted the exhibition and

Artists: African tribal artists, Paula

of this advertising image. In addition,
Aunt Jemima provided for you and ex-

wrote the catalogue for Stitching Memories:

African-American Story Quilts, which traveled

course of time has not changed.”
This topic was the first in twenty years
of essay assignments that excited my students enough to have many say their per-

from the Williams College Museum to the Studio

Laurencin, Georgia O'Keeffe, Phillip
Pearlstein, Audrey Flack, Janet Fish, Alice
Neel, Mary Frank, John De Andrea,

Reginald Hildebrand, her colleague in the history department, devised this interdisciplinary
course as a means to study the experiences of

Duane Hanson, Fumio Yoshimura, Rob-

Blacks in America.

ceptions ofthe world had been changed.
Devising the art-historical aspects of
this course proved difficult for me, however, because I came to this material the

ert Mapplethorpe.

“African America: Images, Ideas, and Re-

hard way—as an autodidact. Books on

Does an artist have an obligation to

alities,” a course first taught in Fall 1989

American art generally make no men-

her/his ethnic background?

at Williams College in Massachusetts, was

tion of art by Black Americans. These

designed to investigate images of'and by

“comprehensive surveys” ignore even

Theoretical work: Langston Hughes,
“The Negro Artist and the Racial Mountain,” The Nation, June 23, 1926.
Artists: Betye Saar, Romare Bearden,
Jacob Lawrence, Alma W. Thomas, Faith

Ringgold, Howardena Pindell, Sam
Gilliam, Maxine Hong Kingston,
Bernard Malamud, Jimmy Durham, Kay
Walkingstick.
Do works of art influence ideas and
behavior?
Theoretical work: Monroe C. Beardsley, “Moral and Critical Judgments” in
Aesthetics: Problems in the Philosophy of

Blacks. The class of mostly juniors inves-

monly portrayed, the people who controlled these images, and to what end.
Paintings, photographs, advertisements,
and films were the primary documents.
Discarding the usual hierarchies, the

can art. They are not. And so I have had

peck method ofresearch. To spare some

California Raisins, and Robert Mapple-

of you my early flailing about, I’d like to

thorpe’s contortionists were given equal

share some readings. x

consideration.
The essay assignment for the course
concerned racial stereotypes and as-

American history. The students were
given four pictures of Aunt Jemima. One

Lee, Judy Chicago, Hannah Wilke, Hung

image from the turn of the century and

critic, and painter. She is currently a humani-

should be familiar to Ph.D.s in Ameri-

to rely more or less on the hunt-and-

sumed a basic grounding in African-

Ruth Bass, Ph.D., is a professor of art, art

Bannister, Aaron Douglas, and William

culture: Faith Ringgold’s quilts, the

Pablo Neruda, Chinua Achebe, Spike

Frida Kahlo. X

reputations. Edmonia Lewis, Edward

Johnson are just a few of the names that

class freely mingled fine art and popular

Artists: June Jordan, Imamu Baraka,

Leon Golub, Sue Coe, Diego Rivera,

those Black artists who bucked the odds

tigated the kinds of images most com-

Criticism.

Liu, Oyvind Fahlstrom, Ida Applebroog,

TE

Museum of Harlem in 1989-90. Grudin and

another from the 1930s came from the
catalogue Ethnic Notions. The other two
images, the 1968-89 Jemima and the latest pearl-earringed version, were provided by the Quaker Oats Company’s

Recommended Readings
in African-American
Art and Images
Important Resources
The Hatch-Billops Collection, 491 Broadway, 7th Floor, New York, N.Y. 10012.
An archive of Black American cultural
history that serves as a research library and includes slides, tapes, pho-

tographs, and exhibition catalogues.
American Visions:The Magazine of AfroAmerican Culture , published by the Visions

JO VV RYL

r

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S O M E

h

Foundation, Frederick Douglass House

. “Art or Propaganda.” The Critical

— Capitol Hill, Smithsonian Institution,

Temper of Alain Lockeed. Jeffrey C. Stewart.

Washington, D.C. 20560. Ask them to in-

New York: Garland, 1983, pp. 27-28.

form you of their periodic conferences on
issues in Black American art. Some of
the past conferences are available on

audiocassette.
General
Driskell, David C. “Art by Blacks: Its Vital Role
in the U.S. Culture.” Smithsonian (Oct.

Schmidt-Campbell, Mary. Harlem Renaissance:
Art of Black America, with essays by David

Driskell, David Levering Lewis, and Deborah Willis Ryan. New York: Studio Mu-

seum in Harlem-Abrams, 1987.
Schuyler, George S. “The Negro Hokum.”
The Nation, Vol. 122, No. 3180 (June 1926):

662-663.

1976): 86—93.
———. Hidden Heritage: Afro-American Art,

1800-1950. San Francisco: Association,
1985.
. Two Centuries of Black American Art.
New York: Knopf, 1976.
Fine, Elsa Honig. The Afro-American Artist: A
Search for Identity. Holt, Rinehart, Winston,

1973. Reprint, New York: Hacker Books,
1982.
Porter, James A. Modern Negro Art. New York:
Dryden Press, 1943.
“Racism” issue, Heresies, Vol. 4., No. 3,
Issue 15 (1982).

Harlem Renaissance

Historical Background
Dubois, W. E. B. “Of Our Spiritual Strivings.”

Crisis (Oct. 1926.)

Hughes, Langston. “The Negro Artist and the

Locke, Alain. “The American Negro As Art-

cisco: Quilt Digest Press, 1989.
and Crafts. Jackson: University Press of
Mississippi, 1983.
Grudin, Eva Ungar. Stitching Memories: AfricanAmerican Story Quilts. Williamstown, Mass.:
Williams College Museum of Art, 1990.
Leon, Eli. Who’d a Thought It: Improvisation in

African-American Quiltmaking. San Francisco: San Francisco Craft and Folk Art
Museum, 1987.

1986, pp. 363-371.

Livingston, Jane, and John Beardsley, with a

Ellison, Ralph. Introduction to Shadow and
Act. New York: Random House, 1964.

Art in America 1930-1980. Jackson: Cor-

Huggins, Nathan I., Martin Kilson, and Daniel

coran Gallery of Art/University Press of

Fox, eds. Key Issues in the Afro-American
Experience, vols. I, II. New York: Harcourt
Brace Jovanovich, 1971.

Wesley, Charles H. “Creating and Maintaining
an Historical Tradition.” Journal of Negro
History (Jan. 1964):13-33.

contribution by Regenia Perry. Black Folk

Mississippi, 1982.
Vlach, John Michael. The Decorative Tradition
in the Decorative Arts. Cleveland: Cleveland
Museum of Art, 1978.
Wilson, James L. Clementine Hunter: American
Folk Artist. Gretna, La.: Pelican Publishing,
1988.

White Relations in the American South Since

Emancipation. New York: Oxford Unversity

Black Women Artists

Press, 1986.
Bontemps, Arna Alexander, ed. Forever Free.

African-American Folk
Art and Crafts

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Jeffrey C. Stewart. New York: Garland, 1983.

and Quilts on American Society. San Fran-

Farris, William, ed. Afro-American Folk Arts

Huggins, New York: Library of America,

Racial Mountain.” The Nation, Vol. 122,
No. 3181 (June 23, 1926): 692-694.

Hearts and Hands: The Influence of Women

In W. E. B. DuBois’ Writings, ed. Nathan

Williamson, Joel. Rage for Order: Black and
DuBois, W. E. B. “Criteria for Negro Art.” The

Craft. New York: Van Nostrand Reinhold,
1971.

Ferraro, Pat, Elaine Hedges, and Julie Silber.

Chase, Judith Wragg. Afro-American Art and

Alexandria, Va.: Stevenson, 1980. (An
exhibition of art by African-American
women 1862-1980).
Brown, Kay. “Where We At: Black Women

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Artists.” Feminist Art Journal, Vol. 1 (April
1972): 25.

Cliff, Michelle. “Object into Subject: Some
Thoughts on the Work of Black Women
Artists” In Visibly Female: Feminism and Art

Today, ed. Hilary Robinson, London:
Camden Press, 1987, pp. 140-157.
Wallace, Michele, ed. Faith Ringgold: Twenty
Years of Painting, Sculpture and Performance.

New York: Studio Museum in Harlem,
1984.

Images of Blacks
Benberry, Cuesta. “White Perceptions of Blacks
in Quilts and Related Media.” Uncoverings
(1983): 59-74.
Berkeley Arts Center. Ethnic Notions: Black
Images in the White Mind. 1982. Berkeley
Arts Center, 1275 Walnut Street, Berkeley,
Cal. 94709. Exhibition catalogue of Afro-

American stereotypes and caricatures, with
essays by Robbin Henderson, Leon
Litwack, Erskine Peters, introduction by
Janette Faulkner.
Dalton, Karen C. C., and Peter H. Wood.
Winslow Homer’s Images of Blacks: The Civil
War and Reconstruction Years. Introduction
by Richard J. Powell. Austin: Menil Collection/University of Texas Press, 1988.
Honour, Hugh. The Image of the Blacks in

Wheat, Ellen Harkins. Jacob Lawrence, Amerisippi, 1983, pp. 27—63.

Western Art, vol. IV. Cambridge: Harvard
University Press, 1989.
Parry, Ellwood. The Image of the Indian and the
Black Man in American Art: 1500—1900.
New York: Braziller, 1974.

Vintage Books, 1984.

Vlach, John. “The Shotgun House: An American Architectural Legacy.” In Afro-American

Photography

Folk Arts and Crafts, ed. William Ferris
Jackson: University Press of Mississippi,

Marks, Laura U. “Reinscribing the Self: An
Interview with Clarissa Sligh.” Afterimage,
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Moutoussany-Ashe, Jeanne. Viewfinders: Black
Women Photographers. New York: Dodd,
Mead, 1986.

Willis-Thomas, Deborah. Black Photographers,
1840-1940: An Illustrated Bio-bibliography.
New York: Garland, 1985.
. Black Photographers, 1940—1988: An
Illustrated Bio-bibliography. New York: Garland, 1989.

and Howard Dodson. Black Photog— 56

raphers Bear Witness: 100 Years of Social
Protest. Williamstown, Mass.: Williams College Museum of Art, 1989.

African Influences on
African-American Art
“African Symbolism in Afro-American Quilts.”

1983, pp. 274—295,

Wahlman, Maude Southwell. “AfricanAmerican Quilts: Tracing the Aesthetic
Principles.” The Clarion, Vol. 14, No. 2

(Spring 1989): 44-54.

68-76.

tunity (May 1924): 134-142.

Thompson, Robert Farris. “African Influence
on the Art of the United States.” In Afro-

versity of Washington Press, 1986.

Art at Mid-Century
Ellison, Ralph. “The Art of Romare Bearden.”
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Temper of Alain Locke, ed. Jeffrey C. Stewart. New York: Garland, 1983, pp. 191-194.

19th-Century Artists
Hartigan, Lynda Roscoe. Sharing Traditions:
Five Black Artists in Nineteenth Century
America: From the Collections of the National
Museum of American Art. Washington, D.C.:

Smithsonian Institution Press, 1985.
Richardson, Marilyn. “Vita Edmonia Lewis.”
Harvard Magazine (March/April 1986).
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Freeman and Early American Portrait Painter.

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1987.

1930s and 1940s

African Arts, Vol. 20, No. 1 (Nov. 1986):

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can Painter. Seattle: Seattle Museum/Uni-

. Flash of the Spirit: African and AfroAmerican Art and Philosophy. New York:

Hayes, Vertis. “The Negro Artist Today.” In Art
for the Millions, ed. Francis O'Connor.
Boston: New York Graphic Society, 1973,
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Monroe, Gerald M. “The ’30s: Art, Ideology

1960s and Early 1970s
Davis, Douglas. “What Is Black Art?” Newsweek
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Perry, Bruce, ed. Malcolm X: The Last Speeches.
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Schmidt-Campbell, Mary. Tradition and Conflict:
Images of a Turbulent Decade, 1963—1973.

New York: Studio Museum in Harlem,
1985.
Smith, Frank. “Afri-Cobra: Twenty Years Later.”
Drum (May 1988).

Contemporary Trends
Jones, Kellie. “Interview with David Hammons.” Art Papers: Covering the Arts in the
Southeast, Vol. 12, No. 4 (July/Aug. 1988):
39-42.
“Painting It Black: African American Artists in

American Folk Arts and Crafts, ed. William

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ton Post (Dec. 10, 1989). x

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How to Make an

HExcellent
a T aTeacher
Bwn
7 BARBARA A. ST. JOHN (

Select Poke Sauté reduce poking

one Grade A student with a

repeatedly with state tacher

B.A. (Many grade A students

competencies.

themselves into math/
science/engineering or

Remove
student from ed classroom

to substitute a grade C

and place in elementary/

student.)

secondary classroom.

student in large, statefunded teachers' college pot

a cup of observation.

Repeat

straining, and

grate
with thirty to thirty-five

teeny-boppers in elementary/secondary classroom.

doneness by

straining
student with cheesecloth
Student should be half baked
by Christmas.

procedure until eyes are
glazed and brain is shrunk.

with tests to throw student
off balance.

classroom.

made of lesson plans.

red tape.

Stir

Return
to elementary/secondary

Make first check for

Add

after putting through ricer of

Vigorously

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amount of lesson plan

M.B.A. pots. You may have

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with ed research written requirements.

have a tendency to throw

Allow to rest
as with yeast bread.

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About June 15th

check Ê$or

doneness.
Student should be mentally
and physically limp.

Stuff
cored teaching credential in
mouth. Student is then

Place

a handful of strategies, as

Repeat

ready to be placed in school

many as you can, and wrap

above procedure

district pot and is now an

in education classroom.

student tightly.

except

Excellent Teacher.

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The photograph leads the mind
to the actual world...

—58

If it is of a nude, it will

make one think of women, not art.

Education

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m

Hannah Wilke created a female iconography in the 19504. She is a conceptual artist working in scu {ptural materials, photography, painting, and performance art.

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The ways of poetry are many, and whacking

Yes, I do mean to be catty.

words against thighs, spotting clean sheets

I am tired of male see-my-pecker poets

who always seem to get published. Dirty Boys

of academic journals with sperm images,

from Hoboken to Carmel-by-the-Sea :

or rimming out the thought-infused mind

don’t have to lift a metaphor or run a thought

with tight little words like cunt

along a line to get some buddy editor

must be among the trendy ways of getting off
a load of committee-infested days

to celebrate every late night emission
they care to spill. Call it penis envy,

and middle-age nights. Or maybe these

call me the castrating female

are the angry young poets of our day
with little to shoot off but their mouths.

or, worse, a prude. I stopped
turning somersaults without my pants on

Either way, I for one am tired

when I was three.

of well-entrenched open-trench-coat poets.

Je uA

X

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PAP SHEET

(cherished advice from teachers and family)

Why did you give Santa a black beard?
Santa doesn't have a black beard.

"p"

PAMBLA DESIRES

AN ARTIST TO BE

A PORTRAIT BY P.S.

What are those yellow lines coming out
of the sun? You made it look as if the
sun has whiskers.

SOME DAY YOU WILL SEE

PAMELA SHOEMAKER 327 HICKORY LANE HADDONFIELD, N.J.

We don't have a real art program, but
we do have an art teacher who gives
classes twice a week,

atete

Saint Margarets School
Waterbury, Connecticut

The honors of graduation are conferred upan '
Cj

Pamela huntshoemaker
in testimony that she has completed ‘Ehe presrribed
conrear of study and is therefore awarded this diploma
the ninth day of Junerase

You may go to any college you want,
but if you want to go to art school,
you have to live at home and go in

. Philadelphia. If you still want to go
3 after 2 years of college, then we'll
PRAESES- ET- CURATORES-COLLEGII-VASSARINI
IN: NOVI -EBORACI-FINIBUS

OMNIBUS-HAS-LITTERAS-PERLECTURIS- SALUTEM

NOTUM'SIT: PAMELA • HUNT © SHOEMAKER "AD -LITTERARUM -AC
SCIENTIARUM STUDIA - ET - AD - CETERA - HUJUSCE ACADEMIAE- OMNIA OFFICIA
DILIGENTER FELICITERQUE -INCUBUISSE
QUAMOBREM -PRO -AUCTORITATE NOBIS - COMMISSA - FACULTATE - APPROBANTE
EAM-TITULO -GRADUQUE -QUI -APPELLARI -SOLET

ARTIUM -BACCALAUREUS
CONDECORAVIMUS ` ET- OMNIA -JURA -HONORES - INSIGNIA UBIQUE- GENTIUM

Twenty years old is too young for a
girl to be on her own in New York.
If you want to quit college and go to
art school, you can live at home and
go in Philadelphia
OOA

AD-EUNDEM -PERTINENTIA-IN-EAM-CONTULIMUS
CUJUS - REI - HAE -MEMBRANULAE -CUM ` SIGILLO -ACADEMICO -ET - CHIROGRAPHO
PRAESIDIS -TESTIMONIO SINT
EX-AEDIBUS-ACADEMICIS- DIE- QUINTO -IUNII-ANNO-DOMINI-MDCCCCLXVI

fter four years at a good college,
you should be able to support yourself., If you still want to go to art
school, you. should be able to pay for
it yourself

The COOPER UNION forthe Advancement of Science and Art s

m why do you have to quit that wonder-

HAS SATISFACTORILY COMPLETED THE PRESCRIBED COURSE OF STUDY IN

THE COOPER UNION SCHOOL OF ART AND ARCHITECTURE AND 1S HEREBY AWARDED THIS CERTIFICATE

ful job togo to art school? Why can't
you just take a couple of courses at
the Art Student's League?

We11l if you want to be an artist, all
I can say is tħat you had better find
yourself a rich husband or one who's
a famous artist himself, because no
woman gets anywhere as an artist without one or the other.
Of course in my day people thought an

MFA killed an artist's imagination,
r sister tells me that now no

Pamela Shoemaker Rap Sheet, 1989, pen and ink.
Pamela Shoemaker is a New York artist whose work appears in public spaces.

Heresies 25

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cations ask which college you attended?)
Some colleges are markers for being the
boss not the employee, the manager instead of the managed. |t is in the mindset rather than the academic program of
the institution. These are the historically
From what | have learned so far, sociol-

thought to be a way to “better” oneself.

white elitist institutions, which include not

ogy is the methodological study of how

When education is looked at in terms of

only the Ivy League schools (Harvard, Yale,

people interact within society and how so-

what it does in society, the term “better”

Columbia, Dartmouth, Princeton, and the

ciety acts upon the individual. Sociology

means to raise one's class and economic

like) but also their Seven Sisters counter-

helps people explore patterns in society

status. However, those who already have

parts: Smith, Radcliffe, Wellesley, Mount

that some would like to believe don't exist,

power, wealth, privilege, and status actively

Holyoke, Vassar, Bryn Mawr, and Barnard.

like how “decent,” “normal” people's ac-

want to keep it. Not only do individuals

Other prestigious institutions such as

tions can and do support the extreme ac-

act to maintain their own personal power,

Swarthmore, Amherst, Duke, and Stanford

“That’s just your opinion” that are so often

but groups act as a collective to maintain

provide the next level in the hierarchy. You

used to choke off dialogue rather than con-

the status quo distribution of privilege,

know the names. They are the ones you

tinue it.

wealth, and power. This not necessarily

are supposed to be impressed by when

Both more and less than a sociological

calculated or even conscious group main-

someone says she/he graduated from

study, this article is an effort to integrate

tenance of status quo is called hegemony.

there. When interviewing for a job, it is dis-

my semirural, working-class Black/white

In a supposedly class-free capitalist coun-

turbing to note the increased respect in

background with my experiences as a stu-

try, education becomes the system of ac-

the tone of the interviewer when | say |

dent at Bryn Mawr College and with the

cess to power and privilege.

am a Bryn Mawr graduate. One of the

tions of such groups as the Ku Klux Klan,
how women are taught to disempower
themselves, or how the educational system is not much more egalitarian than it
was in the fifties. Sociology provides a way
to get beyond defensive remarks such as

functioning mechanisms of the educa-

The general rationale goes like this: The

functions of hegemonic control is to con-

United States is a meritocracy where you
earn success through your abilities.

White

ities so that you will be more qualified for
higher-paying, more prestigious jobs.

Elitist

Some schools are “better” than others, by
virtue of having “better” professors and

vince people that there are no mecha-

whole. | am the first in my family to attend

“better” academics to “better” prepare

nisms of control at work, nothing is hap-

an lvy League—level school. My family is

you. Prepare you for what? Ah, that must

pening, merit won the day. It also teaches

so proud of me that I used to feel guilty for

remain vague if American society is to be

the specially privileged that they deserve

the feelings of dissatisfaction and confu-

tional system in the United States as a

= 62

Schooling enhances and hones those abil-

viewed as classless and egalitarian! In ac-

privilege and have earned the right to suc-

sion that would strike me just when | was

tuality, schooling tracks you into various

cess and special treatment.

supposed to be so happy. I know that |

levels of the socioeconomic hierarchy, de-

am not alone in this contradiction.

pending on which school you attend.

cause, though they allow People of Color

(Haven't you ever wondered why job appli-

to participate, they remain invested in

What is education anyway? It is usually

I call these colleges “white elitist” be-

maintaining a class, economic, racial, and
sexual hierarchy with able-bodied white

DENISE TUGGLE

ges

corporate middle-to-upper-class men on
top. Though they allow token participation,
the actual number of People of Color is
kept at a relatively small percentage of the
The Art of

Education

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63 —

college campuses across the country dur-

herst, Dartmouth, Brown, and MIT. It is a

ple in control—professors and administra-

ing the last few years. Look back in the

common saying at Bryn Mawr that the

tors—are somehow always white. These

newspapers and you will see that most of

school teaches you to be a white man,

contradictions are what I think has caused

the outbreaks happened at prestigious

which I always thought was funny, since |

the outbreak of racial dissatisfaction on

campuses such as Smith, Stanford, Am-

have never wanted to be one, but I do

community, and the vast majority of peo-

Heresies 25

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to

cause we will “fit in well” at such-and-such

want security and not to be discriminated

social rareness probably IS the specific

against. In American society, that is a privi-

overt conscious reason | was accepted, |

school, which implies that we won't make

lege reserved for white men.

think that there are larger sociological

white students, professors, and adminis-

forces at play here. I have noticed some

trators confront their white-skin privilege.

instead of writing about it, someone usu-

rather remarkable similarities in all the very

We will not question the very fundamental

ally breaks in about this time and says that

different Students of Color | have met in

purpose of the college in perpetuating

I don't know what | am talking about be-

lvy League circles.

When I am talking about this subject

cause “Look, there are more nonwhites

For example, | began asking American

White Supremacy. In fact, many of us,
when we have problems, will attribute

here than there were twenty years ago. So-

Students of Color, at random, three

them to our own laziness, poor time man-

ciety is changing and growing, and why

questions:

agement, and/or stupidity, just like white

are you here anyway if you feel this way?”
This is a specific example of the hegemonic process in action. Remember, nothing is going on, and we deserve success. |

1. Is your neighborhood at home mostly
white?

2. Was your high school mostly white?
3. Are either of your parents white?

find it interesting that | occasionally get
this reaction from People of Color as well

For many of the People of Color | have
met outside Ivy League circles, these are

as whites.

really bizarre questions. However, among



people. If we fail, it is because we did
poorly, not because the institution is oriented toward a white middle-class existence, which often relegates us to the role
of Other. Many Black students have but

J Dv rm © mN rmm » >» wv a

little historical knowledge of their heritage
or a romanticized notion and/or selective
memory.

the students at white elitist colleges, the
vast majority have answered yes to at /east
two out of these three questions! Before |
came to college, | had met only one other
Black person with a white parent, and yet
Yo what is going

—— 64

t is important to

in the school year 1988—89 at Bryn Mawr,

on for Students of Color anyway? It is not

at least ten out of the forty-seven Black

look at the exceptions resulting from the

enough to say that we are all Oreos, Ba-

American women had a white parent. The

three questions. The responses of Asians
and Caribbeans follow a pattern, which

nanas, and Apples—that is, brown, yellow,

point is, even if we are not whitewannabes,

and red on the outside and white on the

a large part of our social orientation has

inside—because not all of us are, at least

been white-defined. In short, many of the

practices at work. One does not have to

not consciously. Why was |, a loud, proud

People of Color who choose and get ac-

alienate oneself and one's culture if one's

brings me to another aspect of hegemonic

culture can be fit into a white-defined

Black woman, accepted by all the schools

cepted to white elitist colleges are pro-

to which I applied, including three Seven

foundly white-identified. This is a dialec-

mold. Many Asian cultures have their own

Sisters? It certainly wasn't my essay saying

tical relationship. Â

work ethic, which allows them to work

how great Malcolm X was, and how | want

On one level, schools are choosing the

to be like him! At first I thought it was

“whitest” People of Color to attend the very

more easily within the white-defined Protestant work ethic. One theory on why
significant numbers of Asian-Americans

simply because Black women who gradu-

schools that will train them further to main-

ate as valedictorians from New England

tain the white-dominated hierarchy. (This

have been successful in this educational

private schools are rare and that made me

is called being “successful” and “hard

system is that they do not have to give up

a pretty hot item. | truly don't believe that

working.”) We are told repeatedly that we

I would be here today if I had stayed at

are “special,” which implies “not like the

and Native American people do in order

Brewer Public High School.! Though my

rest of our people.” We are chosen be-

to “fit in.”

as much of their culture as Afro-American

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OU

Among Black people at Bryn Mawr and

it seems, are/were attracted to the idea of

Haverford I have noticed large percentages

the automatic respect derived from atten-

of Caribbean students. This is important

dance at the “right” school. Never mind

because there is tension in the Black com-

that this authority is based in class and

munity between Afro-American Blacks

race hierarchies.

especially women's colleges, have a lot to

and Caribbean Blacks.” The gist of the tension is that Caribbean Blacks tend to view

offer Women of Color, but if we go in blind,

then we are vulnerable to the profound

American Blacks as lazy and shiftless, and

pressures to “fit in,” and thus lose our-

American Blacks tend to view Caribbean
Blacks as stuck-up, cold, and money hun-

hite elitist wom-

gry. What appears to be happening is a

en's colleges are interesting phenomena,

cultural clash revealing that Caribbean

and not nearly so depressing as white

Black people have an ethic of their own,

elitist men’s or co-ed colleges. As l've said,

similar to the Protestant work ethic.^ Inter-

the point of a white elitist college is to in-

national students are another issue. They

doctrinate students with the feeling that

tend to come from the ruling or upper-

they are important and deserving of au-

middle classes of their country and there-

thority. This seems to me a great message

fore have a class identification that is often

to give to women and especially Women

viewed as the key to “helping them

of Color! So in among the classist, racist,

to adjust.”

sexist, homophobic messages of white

The other part of this dialectical rela-

n the final analysis, I believe that white elitist institutions,

elitist women's institutions, there is an em-

selves. | still want security, and I don't think

l or anyone should have to sacrifice one's

struggle! X

self or culture for it. Join me in the good

1| transferred to a private school and took two senior years because Reaganomics messed up my
Social Security. See, it would pay for an extra year
of high school but not my first year of college. Ironically, | graduated first in my private school class
with the same grades that had put me in only the
top 20 percent of my public school class.

^In response to “Are either of your parents white?”
one Puerto Rican man said, “Yes, both of them.
Puerto Ricans are white.” A nearby friend of his
wanted to know why I was asking such questions,

tionship is that white-identified People of

powering subversion possible, but not in-

Color are more likely to pick white elitist

evitable. For Women of Color this right to

colleges than People of Color who identify

authority is a very important message, be-

with their own culture.” For example, when

cause in this racist patriarchal society we

I was looking at colleges, my counselor

have been taught to get our strongest iden-

told me point blank, “Denise, women get

tification from our racial culture.. If we view

a better education at women’s colleges

our strength and support as coming solely

cestors experienced a different history in the Car-

and Black people get a better education

from our ethnic culture, then we will be

States.

at Black colleges, so you should apply to

and are vulnerable to the sexism of men.

and my Puerto Rican friend got very angry at my
explanation. “Look,” he said, “I am not conforming
to anyone! My philosophy on life is he who dies
with the most toys wins!” He turned his back on me
in a huff when | pointed out that such a statement
fits beautifully into white middle-class yuppiedom.

` Afro-American Blacks’ ancestors were brought
straight over from Africa. Caribbean Blacks’ an-

ibbean before choosing to come to the United

^ Afro-Americans’ work ethic takes second place to

some of both.” Terror ran through me at

(Compulsory heterosexuality and patri-

the mere thought of going to a Black col-

archy know no color lines.) For Women of

lege. When | got to Bryn Mawr, | was sur-

Color, learning to value ourselves as wom-

the many problems that have become part of our
historical and cultural experience as a result of
once being America’s slaves, and to the white atti-

prised to hear from friends how their

en gives us perspective both on our rela-

parents had actually forbidden them to

tionships to Men of Color and to women

apply to Black colleges. Parental disap-

with white-skin privilege. It is unfortunate

tudes and social structures that persist even today.

This seems to be true among white people also,

proval was the second most frequently

that it is so often white-identified Women

cited reason for not going to a Black col-

of Color who get to participate in this pro-

lege. The first reason was an amorphous

cess, since ethnically identified Women of

fear of an all-Black educational setting.

Color could do so much more with this

Like myself, many young People of Color,

empowerment.

but it is much more subtle, because so many

65 —

Euro-Americans have lost so much of their past
and identify themselves as just “white.” Ethnicity
among white people seems to be something to be
overcome.

Denise Tuggle graduated from Bryn Mawr College in the spring of 1989. She currently supports herself as a life model but will be moving
into the field of social work in the fall of 1990.

Heresies 25

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igı

th

fru

libi

ph

she

hel

OVE

pel

A r t
social, political, and economic factors and integrating

Two questions must be asked of any program in art

the findings into artmaking practice is rarely taught in

education: Does it give students the tools with which to
make significant visual statements, and does it provide

SHEILA PINKEL

art departments. It is assumed that art education con-

them with the ability to decipher, function in, and con-

sists of learning a complement of techniques; rarely

tribute to the world around them? In seeking answers |

does this process include exploration of ideas through

have located two subject areas that are not currently

personal observation and research. What is particu-

included in most art school curricula: 1) practice in

larly distressing about this fragmented situation is that

integrating personal observation and analysis of con-

from the very beginning of their education, students

temporary society into the activity of artmaking and 2)

are taught to be powerless and disenfranchised and

discussions about the changing relationship of the art-

are not given the tools to go beyond the veneer of ap-

ist to the culture.

pearances to gain more depth of insight.

How to form a picture of culture through a study of

Most of my students do not have the ability to reThe Art of

Education

— 66

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search a subject and form a picture of the emerging
reality. When asked to investigate, they exhibit extreme
ignorance about how to proceed, and their explorations are pallid and lack passion. I have become increasingly concerned that this lack of passion and this
inability to develop a personal perspective are symptoms
of a nonworking educational system. A course that inte-

disenfranchisement through disinformation. When she
reexamined advertisements of the happy family of workers and customers, she began to understand the gap
between the veneer of the public image and the impenetrable monolith of the corporation itself. She had not
set out to find this. She had simply wanted to take pictures at a restaurant.

grates personal observation and library research with socioeconomic and political analysis would provide art
students with an opportunity to expand the ways in which

they “know” about the world.
Personal observation, experience, and subsequent
practice in forming an artwork based on that experience
constitute the crucial learning. Itis only through students’
willingness to encounter the world for themselves and
pay attention to their experience in the process that they
can really learn how to research for themselves. In the
middle of this learning process students often feel overwhelmed and confused, but this is a crucial part of the

In another instance I asked my students to make portraits of administration, faculty, students, and maintenance staff at the school where | teach. Each person
photographed was asked to write about her/his hopes,
dreams, and greatest fears. We assembled the final text
and images into a book, which was then xeroxed and
distributed to participants. This project gave students an
opportunity to interface with the various strata of persons at the school and find out something more about
them. The students learned about working together on a
project and discovered that the finished book made visiblea broader reality than any individual's work generated.

learning, part of the adventure of not knowing and trying

to understand. Ultimately, new recognitions emerge as

Explorations like those discussed above must be accompanied by classes that expand the student's poetic,

well as an appropriate final form that can adequately

intuitive self, the ultimate goal being to develop an inte-

communicate the emerging insights. In my experience,

grated person with a frame of reference from which to

unless students practice this process in school, they don't

identify the things she/he values. It is through the devel-

learn how to do it later on, and the symbols and images

opment of the spirit of each person that truly synthetic

they select remain conventional.

art education can be achieved. A love of form and of

Several years ago | taught a class in which students
were asked to choose a subject, study it for a semester,
photograph it, and finally make an artwork reflecting their

beauty and a knowledge of harmony, balance, and the
interrelatedness of the beings and elements of this world
are crucial to the full growth of the individual artist.

understanding and attitudes. Initially the students were
frustrated because they did not have any idea how to do
library research, how to investigate a subject in depth.
One student selected a fast food chain to study and
photograph. On her first day of photographing she found
she was not allowed ïhside the fast food restaurant with

sonal issues, and at times making work that has a social

Angeles. In the process she learned that no one knew
who was responsible for the rule against photographing.

ely

igh

CU-

She then asked about the corporate structure and
again could get no clear response. She started talking
with workers at the individual facilities and discovered
that they did not know anything more than their own job.

They had no idea where the cows were bred, grazed, or
slaughtered, where the buns came from, or anything
about the corporate structure. They certainly didn't know

nts

that land in Central America is deforested so that cattle

nd

can be grazed for fast food chains in Europe and the

ap-

ponsive to cultural concerns, working at times on per-

use.

person to ask, she was told to call Chicago, which she

on-

life. It is crucial that art education include a discussion
of the integration of the two, which includes staying res-

she could get permission to do her project. After calling

did, only to discover that they in turn told her to call Los

tin

classroom. Today art activity is seen as isolated from daily

her camera. I told her to call the corporate office to see if

over twenty people, none of whom could identify the right

ing

The relationship of the artist to the culture and to the
larger fabric of her/his own life is rarely discussed in the

U.S. Nor did they think about the wage structure that
results in economic benefits for management and investors only. She began to understand the extent of their

In this regard | find that books such as Cultures in
Contention, edited by Douglas Kahn and Diane Neumaier,
The Lagoon Cycle by Helen and Newton Harrison, The
New Photography by Frank Webster, and Ways of Seeing
by John Berger are useful in generating a dialogue about
the relationship of the artist to the culture.
We can no longer afford to offer an education experience that leads to a passive, impotent relationship with
culture and to alienation from our own voices. Students
need to learn the tools for making significant, challenging statements and to function as individuals in a complex world. My hope is to prepare students to negotiate,

question, and comment upon this world. E
Sheila Pinkel is an artist and chairperson of the photography
program at Pomona College. She is an international editor of
the art/seience publication Leonardo and is on the national
board of the Society for Photographic Education.

—— £9

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s RRRA
Sara Pasti The Library, 1990, litho crayon on lexan.

68

On Learning and Criticism

KAREN J. BURSTEIN
The Art of

Education
EE

N

t

v

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argaret has her

argaret Lucas Cav-

Ladies: Beauty,

endish tosses in
her bed. Outside

Love, Wit, Vertue,
Happy, and so many oth-

the birds sing, and their

high-pitched sounds

ers. They drink wine in

carry through the still morning air, over the window

Margaret’s dreams, and then they win wars, woo

sill, and to the ears of Margaret. Margaret puts the

men and women both, do heroic deeds, and orate

bird sounds in her dreams, though she never

with tremendous wisdom. Margaret stays with her

remembers them upon awakening.

Ladies in her chambers. The wine is spilled on the

And now Margaret wakes. Her eyes pop open and
she stares, first at the ceiling, blue in the early light

bed and the orations are on parchment.
Margaret’s chambers are in England. Her Ladies

of dawn, then outside the window, where the

are there on the wine-soaked bed. They are also in

birds sing.

France, where Margaret once served the Queen Hen-

She seems to remember something she must do.

rietta Maria when the court was in exile there. Mar-

Vague, in a further corner of her mind it is there, like

garet was a Lady to the Queen, a Lady-in-waiting,

the dreams she never remembers. Yawning sofily and

although thought dull and stupid by the court be-

rubbing her eyes, Margaret tries to find the thought.

cause she never raised her eyes or conversed. As a

She sits for a moment on the edge of her bed. The

child Margaret had been so protected by her family

floor is cold, and on first contact with it she mutters,

that she was shy with strangers and did not know

“The Comical Duchess,” quietly to herself, then
aloud, as she reaches for the bell on her bedside table.
In a moment she is up, standing on the chill floor.

how to behave at court. She wore dresses of her own
design, ignoring fashion, and was thought to be eccentric as well as dull.

She wonders if she should check the fire in her hus-

Two women in a still chamber at dawn, features

band’s chamber, for the air is damp, and as William

softened by sleep and the blue-yellow air, hair half-

ages, the changes in weather affect his health more

brushed and wildly loose about their shoulders, writ-

and more. But she knows that he has been awake

ing. Sarah drawing the quill furiously across the pages

until the early hours of the morning himself, writ-

in long and delicate motions, as Margaret bears verse

ing, and that the fire is surely fine.

at alarming speed. It is the year 1668.

Margaret is brushing her long, dark hair as Sarah,
her maid, enters. The ring of Margaret's bell had in-

ilary has been in the library today, the

truded into her dream. All that Sarah remembers

same library from which Virginia

about her dream is the pasture, and that she was on

Woolf was barred not so many years

horseback, and a bell called her, loud and reverber-

ago. Hilary finds an essay by Virginia

Woolf in a collection called The

ating across the fields. She rode fast to its source,
pulled as if to a magnet.
“Aah, good Sarah,” Margaret greets her. “It was a
strange thing. I woke with the Comical Duchess in

Common Reader, and Hilary likes it especially. It is
called “The Duchess of Newcastle,” and Hilary reads
it twice.

my head and might bring her to life. And also a commitment I must have, for I seem to recall one. Do
you know what that might be?”
“Yes, Lady. Tea with Mister Critik this afternoon.”
“Why, of course. Tea with dear Mister Critik. Oh
my, must I be ridiculed this day? By the by, we shall
see. But let us begin, for Fame’s High Tower is
waiting!”
And as Margaret dictates, Sarah writes swiftly, pausing occasionally to allow her Lady time to mull over
the positioning of words and phrases.
“Sarah! I shall name this A Comedy of the Apocry-

...there was a wild streak in Margaret, a love of finery and extravagance and fame, which was for ever upsetting the orderly arrangements of nature |p. 103].

Margaret could apply herself uninterruptedly to her writing. She
could design fashions for herself and for her servants. She would
scribble more and more furiously with fingers that became less
and less able to form legible letters [p. 106].

One cannot help following the lure of her erratic and lovable
personality as it meanders and twinkles through page after page.
There is something noble and Quixotic and high-spirited, as well
as crack-brained and bird-witted, about her. Her simplicity is so
open; her intelligence so active; her sympathy with fairies so true
and tender. She has the freakishness of an elf, the irresponsibility
of some non-human creature, its heartlessness, and its charm [pp.
111-112).

phal Ladies!”
Margaret brings to life, not only the Comical Duchess, but also the Unfortunate Duchess, the Lady True
Honour, and the Duke of Inconstancy.

Here Hilary pauses. The description of Margaret Cavendish has disintegrated from “noble” to “some nonhuman creature.”

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“I must find out more.” Hilary spends the afternoon and evening in the library and discovers pieces
of Margaret Lucas Cavendish hidden among the
stacks and rows of pages: two volumes of her dramatic verses, Playes (1662) and Plays Never Before

a second-story window. Hilary thinks she can make
out two women, hair loose and wild about their
shoulders. But the heat of the fire wafts over the
image and it is gone.
The sun will soon be fully risen. Hilary has walked

Printed (1668). The hand-cut parchment is yellow and

all night, journeying from the library where Marga-

bound in worn leather. The portraits of Margaret have

ret Lucas Cavendish hid among the pages to this

been torn away from the front of each volume.
The prologues, epilogues, and dedications are

soaked with justifications and apologies. For

stone house where, centuries before, she used
to live.

And now the fire from inside that second-story
room consumes the blue-yellow air outside its win-

example:
All the materials in my head did grow. All is my own, and nothing
do I owe: Be all that I desire as when I die, My memory in my
own works may lye [“A General Prologue to all my Playes,” Playes].

I pass my time rather with scribbling than writing, with words
than wit, not that I speak much, because I am addicted to contemplation [A True Relation of the Birth, Breeding, and Life of Margaret
Cavendish, p. 297).

dow and travels down the drying leaves of the oaks.
Encircling Hilary, the flames fuel themselves with
pages of Lady Cavendish that have yet to be written.
Hilary joins the flame in a consummation surpassing the boundaries of'time, because, she realizes, they
do not exist.

[Playes]...tire me with their empty words, dull speeches, long parts,

ister Critik is ten

tedious Acts, ill Actors; and the truth is, there is not enough variety
in an old play to please me...this Play was writ by a Lady, who on

feet tall, and his

my Conscience hath neither Language, nor Learning, but what is
native and natural [“An Introduction,” Playes].

eyes sweep Fame’s
High Tower. His eyes are

Again Hilary pauses. “What is language and learning

only to be hushed by those around her.
Hilary reads some of Margaret’s plays—The Convent of Pleasure and Nature’s Three Daughters and one
called Pieces of a Play, which is just as long as any of
the others. She also reads the criticisms of them:

the broom that cleanses
the Tower ofits dust, or what they see to be dust,
even when the dust is sparkled confetti. Mister
Critik likes neither sparkles nor confetti amid the
grayness of his decor. One shade of color, whether it
be gray or black or burgundy. For him, a brightly lit
party subverts the true nature of life. “Reason!

Her works frequently do not meet even the loosest standards of
fictional probability and sometimes are incoherent... her printed
works are marred by errors of grammar and syntax, erratic punctuation and eccentric spelling [McGuire, p. 203].

“Fictional probability,” Hilary repeats the phrase several times to herself. “What a contradiction,” she
says aloud and is again hushed by those around her.

Reason! Reason!” he shouts from his balcony. He
must watch the way he leans, for the railing is loose.
“They have told me to lay out the table with prunes
and water,” he claims, “and thus I have.” And tea,
for it is tea-time and a guest is expected.
Only half-expecting the Lady Cavendish to make
an appearance (for she is, by choice, a recluse), Mis-

She reads on:

ter Critik prepares a dose of prune tea, which he
The Duchess was entirely devoid of any dramatic instinct. In all
her plays there is hardly a single character with any semblance of
life: her characters are mere abstractions, qualities, and humours,
uttering the fantastic speeches and quaint conceits which she loved
to write [Firth, p. xxvii].

= 70

The stream of patronizing words continues, but Hilary’s interest is sparked.

does not quite finish gulping down before the front
door gives notice. The man feels slightly askew and
hurriedly stows his prune tea in a cupboard, next to
and slightly behind a volume of criticism. Just as the
Duchess of Newcastle, the Lady Margaret Lucas Cavendish, breezes in, with all the grace ofa fairy misplaced from the stage, he closes the glass door and
turns. “My, she is beautiful,” Mister Critik thinks, not

ilary walks among the oak trees and
stares at the enormous stone house

for the first time.

Bashfully, yet with a certain aura of confidence, the

nearby. The curve of the balcony is

Lady steps to the right, allowing someone, apparently

strong and perfect. She sees herself in

a companion, to pass. Mister Critik catches the prune

an earlier time as a Great Lady,

tea just as it travels back up his esophagus.

pensively or blissfully gazing at the landscape from

Margaret’s friend is surely a woman, though Mis-

one of those balconies. She moves closer to the

ter Critik is daunted and appalled by her costume.

house. The dim light ofa fire glows across the sill of

She wears trousers, like a man, and boots that fasten

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just above the ankles. She wears an odd-looking shirt
of a loosely knitted assortment of colors and tex-

But Mister Critik will not admit this, even to himself. And so he smiles.

tures, which stops just short of her hips. The woman’s hair is cropped about the ears, and the whole
usk falls -due to Mister Critik dulling the

effect is somewhat bewildering. “Another character

flame with his eyes, sweeping the

from a drama of questionable ingenuity,” thinks Mis-

sparkles off Fame’s High Tower and

| ter Critik, who has been told that he is good at think-

absorbing them into the black hole of

| ing. “Surely the Lady Cavendish dreamt her up.”

his decor. Someday the vacuum might

“Lady Cavendish, my dear Duchess, I am unspeakably pleased to receive you as my guest. And, of
course, this pleasure extends to your companion.”
“I return the pleasure, Mister Critik, and would
like to introduce you to my new friend, Hilary. Hilary is unfamiliar with this part of our world, and so,
to educate her, I have invited her to join us. I trust

spit them back out again, or perhaps somebody will
enter and find them. The latter seems more likely.
Hilary must return to the library; she has work to
do. Margaret must go to rest in her Tower. She will
find a place to hide amidst the pages. Margaret hands
Hilary a volume of'writing she dared not give to Mister Critik. The two embrace before they part.

that poses no problem.”
“By all means, no,” says Mister Critik, and motions for the two women to sit on the sofa by the
fire. Mister Critik follows: he always follows his guests.

Mister Critik cannot sleep and gulps prune tea, inebriating himself. In this state he attempts to feed
the liquid to the manuscript of plays given him by
the Duchess. But the manuscript won’t drink and
instead gets stained a bloody burgundy and drips

ady Cavendish wears a gown

of rose-colored taffetta
trimmed with black lace, lowcut across the bosom and
flowing at the wrists. Her hair
is piled extraordinarily over her brow, tendrils
hanging along each temple in perfect curls. When
she turns to Mister Critik and hands him the latest
volume of her dramas and one of her poems, he
smiles, accepting them both with the utmost honor,

onto the gray carpet. Panicked, he thinks ofa way to
protect the carpet and sofa, for his things are expensive. Like a suckling child, he brings the manuscript
to his mouth, but more quickly than he is able to
suck the red liquid, the flame leaps from the fireplace, drying everything. He continues sucking, inhaling the dried flakes of prune tea, then the carpet,
the sofa, the manuscript, and eventually even the fire
itself.

Thus dies Mister Critik, consumed by the flame

Or SO it seems.

he had always ignored.
Much later he says (aside), “Your fairy poems are
in the league of Herrick and Mennis, perhaps even
Shakespeare. But your dramatic verses are horren-

argaret sleeps soundly and

dous—no sense of the three unities or of decorum.

Mister Critik dies painfully and

And one S-shaped verse, even if it exists, which I

Hilary awakes. Hilary’s eyes pop
open. In front of her are rows

highly doubt, would compose an entire scene.”

and stacks of books, dull brown

And the Lady Cavendish, thrice noble and illustrious Duchess of Newcastle, responds (not so aside),

in the fluorescent light. Imprinted on the pages of

“I did much pleasure and delight these Playes to

Margaret Lucas Cavendish’s writing seems to be an

make; For all the times my Playes a making were, My

image of her own face. She feels the burn of for-

brain the stage, my thoughts were acting there.”

gotten words branded into her flesh.

71 —

The man has no response to give, and so he smiles

It is late. The security guards pass through the

and offers more tea. He himself goes without, await-

building, reminding people that soon the doors will

ing the moment of the women’s departure when he

close. Vowing never to get trapped inside—or

will have the opportunity to finish the prune tea

outside—a building. Hilary packs up her things. But

stowed behind his volume of criticism in the glass

first she writes a list and tucks this list into a volume

cupboard. For he knows that if he and Margaret were

of writings she did not have upon entering the library:

alone on a desert island, and Margaret made coco-

Description of a New World by Margaret Lucas Caven-

nut faces with three eyes and no nose and dried milk

dish, Duchess of Newcastle. Though it was published

for a mouth, she would be living by her imagination,

in 1668, the pages are white and unwrinkled. List and

and the art rules of coconut face-making would be

book among her belongings, Hilary is now ready to

as the snow is to the tropiċs.

leave.

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BIBLIOGRAPHY
Cavendish, Margaret Lucas, Duchess of Newcastle (1623-1673).
CCXI Sociable Letters, London, 1664.

——. Grounds of Natural Philosophy, London 1668.
. The Life of William Cavendish, Duke, Marquis, and Earl
of Newcastle, Earl of Ogle, Viscount Mansfield, and Baron of
Bolsover, of Ogle, Bothal and Hepple, &c., London, 1675.
. Nature’s Pictures Drawn by Fancie’s Pencil to the Life,
London, 1656, 1671. (The first edition of which contains A True
Relation of the Birth, Breeding, and Life of Margaret Cavendish,
written by Herself.)
. Observations upon Experimental Philosophy to which is
added the Description of a New World, London, 1666, 1668.
. Orations of Divers Sorts, London, 1662, 1668.

——. Philosophical and Physical Opinions, London, 1655, 1663.
. Philosophical Fancies, London, n.d.

——. Philosophical Letters, or Modest Reflections upon some
Opinions in Natural Philosophy maintained by several learned
authors of the age, London, 1664.
. Playes, London, 1662 (contains twenty-one plays).
. Plays Never Before Printed, London, 1668 (contains five

Lewisburg, Pa.: Bucknell University Press, 1980.
Firth, C.H., ed. Memories of the Duke of Newcastle. London: Routledge; New York: E.P. Dutton & Co., n.d.
Gagen, Jean. “Honor and Fame in the Works of the Duchess of
Newcastle.” Studies in Philology, July 1959: 519—538.
Gorgeau, Angeline. The Whole Duty of a Woman. New York:
Doubleday, 1985.
Grant, Douglas. Margaret the First. London: Rupert Hart-Davis, 1957.

Hampsten, Elizabeth. “Petticoat Authors: 1660-1720.” Women’s
Studies 7 (1980): 21-28.
McGuire, Mary Ann. “Margaret Cavendish, Duchess of Newcastle,
on the Nature and Status of Women.” International Journal of
Women’s Studies, 1:2: 193-206.
Morgan, Fidelis. The Female Wits: Women Playwrights of the Restoration, London: Virago, 1981.
Paloma, Dolores. “Margaret Cavendish, Defining the Female Self.”
Women’s Studies 6 (1979): 411-422.
Perry, Henry Ten Eyck. The First Duchess of Newcastle and Her Husband as Figures in Literary History. (Harvard Studies in English,
vol. 4). Boston, London: Ginn & Co., 1918.
Woolf, Virginia. “The Duchess of Newcastle.” The Common Reader.

New York: Harcourt, Brace & Co., 1925. x

plays).
. Poems and Fancies, London, 1664, 1668.

Karen J. Burstein wrote this essay while a student at Hamp-

. The World’s Olio, London, 1655, 1671.

shire College in Amherst, Mass. It is a response to the deletion

Cotton, Nancy. Women Playwrights in England, c. 1363—1750.

of women writers from the canon.

INA)

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Critics

AMY EDGINGTON

2

1

Critics say my collages are not fine art,

As I see it, what I'm here to do

just bits and pieces of other people’s work.

is to tell the truth

But I say that artists always borrow,

in any voice it wants to use—-

and if they borrow well,

a song, a howl, or a whisper.

when we view their work

The hardest thing about art

we will always feel

is just to do it without question.

a thrill of recognition,

To be an artist means to dare

as we see something familiar

to paint and write lots of bad stuff

that we have never seen before.

that is only fit for the compost heap

Critics say my poems are not well crafted,
but I say that it was never my intention

(but nothing beats compost for starting seeds).
Being udged an artist in this world

to be artful or crafty,

means only showing the people

not if that has anything to do

who have power and money

with the straight-laced teachers I had in school,

exactly what they want to see.

who refused to look at emotions,

And how original is that?

unless I dressed them like fancy dolls

It’s the oldest trick in the book,
if not the oldest profession.

Nothing naked, p/eave, and certainly no genitals!
I use criticism when it’s useful.

So please don’t tell me to take art lessons

or creative writing courses.

One poet friend said to me:

I don’t have the time or money,

This poem is too short

and I have no room to internalize

to say all you want it to say.

academic opinions: my head is too full

She was right, and I went on

of my own ideas that demand to be seen and heard

to write a much better, longer poem.

like anybody else’s children.

This was good advice: not telling me

Anyway, I never learned art in school.

what to write about or how to do it,

I learned that only silence

or implying that I'd never get it right

will satisfy every critic.

because I lacked some inherent talent,

But I failed to find silence

or that really s/e could say it

bearable.

better than I ever could.
At its best, though, criticism
is always a very sharp tool:

May 1987

remember never to offer or grasp
the blade instead of the handle.
73 —
At its worst, criticism becomes
a self-serving authority figure,

a nosy landlord living inside our heads,
getting rich on our fear and self-doubt.

He peeks in our windows when we are naked;
he knocks on our door at midnight,
demanding we pay the back rent;
then he says we’re no good anyway
and threatens to kick us out in the cold.

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Beatın

EMMA AMOS

BEATING THE ODDSFORBA,BFA,
ANDMFAART MAJORS.
Fewer than five out of 100 art school graduates are making art ten
years later. That's a lousy statistic. Despite the many artists we know,

see, and read about, there are enormous numbers more who educated
themselves to be artists but gave up somewhere along the way.

MOVE to a city with galleries, museums, and art hools.

LIVE with or marry an artist. Two can cover more ground
than one.

LEARN to eat and live VERY cheaply.
KEEP up with your classmates. Exchange names and
GET financial aid from doting parents, aunts, family friends.

addresses, including parents’ addresses in case of moves:

FIND work in a job that allows some flexibility in hours, such

KEEP a file of artists’ colonies, summer programs, and

as sales, framing, gallery sitting, conservation, or design.

people who can and will write good references for you.

y y

MAKE time to make art. Get up early on Saturdays and
Sundays and work from 9:00 to 3:00 before doing shop-

Dont

ping, laundry, etc. NO EXCUSES!
MAKE a weekly appointment to go to galleries,
museums, experimental dance, theatre.
CREATE a group of artist friends to exchange studio

DON’T walk your slides around to galleries. Youll get
TAKE slides of your work every three months. Take at least
„ adozen shots of each work so you don't have to make
copies right away. Keep your résumé up to date. Mail your

too discouraged. Send them.

DON’T stay in the same dead-end job for more than a
year. Nowthat.you’ve established an artmaking rhythm,

\Show young, unknown artists. Send a SASE for their return.
APPLY for scholarships to the good summer art schools.

you neéd to 'addrėss- lifetimegoals. Prepare to start training

fof a specific jöBExamples:.Graduate school for teaching,
conservatiónmuseŭin Work. Grad school or special classes

GET accepted to three group shows your first year out.

for, SPNA textile ‘design, industrial design, computer
art, display.”

CURATE a show—including your own work, of course

DON’T wait until the last term of school to plan for

—and find an organization to host the show for free. Invite

your art career.

your friends, the press, and galleries.
DON’T call your old professors, the art office, or the
JOIN the College Art Association. Great job listings.
LOOK in art magazines and newspapers for pertinent
articles, opportunities, and grant listings.
APPLY for your home-state's artists grants as soon as
you're eligible.
MATCH your work to the galleries and curators 'who
show work that seems responsive to your own. Get on their
mailing lists and GO TO ALL THEIR OPENINGS.

dean to help you find a job at graduation.
DONT 1) livein a no-art town or 2) with an unsupportive
roommate, and (3) try not to live at home if at all possible.

DON’T overprice your work.
DON’T frame your work unless youw’re showing it at a
gallery with a chance for sales. Use reusable frames. Keep
your sizes uniform.

DON’T forget to make u iar and T pakab.

DON’T GIVE UR.

Nao)
Education

— 74

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, BUT THE SOMI
Y AND EVEHY SOT

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THEN IF WE AR"

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recent Photo:
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desperate fear, grotesyue PY wrneyuty, and con tCtUy

RICHARD

e ) he chairman’s reputation was well established.



Sre imagined her interview
with the chairman and considered
how she might best present herself.

IOO NBAVEDON

Jr A SJ

e M

he knew the problems an interview entailed and Ow to edit her portfolio to make her work he imagined herself to be a model instructor...

wondered how she would maneuver. comprehensible to him?

COMPOSITION, CONTENT,

FEMINISM, FORMALISM,
MARXISM, MODERNISM ..….

~

J. 7
>»,

A Ow to come across without coming on?

Sin realized that the chairman did not share

her values. How could she communicate her
qualifications without her politics?

«An other aspects of her life by Leigh Kane
she found a variety of solutions to < : c ,

this problem. and Diane Lontius

Leigh Kane is an artist/activist/educator who teaches media studies at Carleton College near Minneapolis.

—— 7G

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> >»

H. know that the department was under Sre was intelligent, articulate, and determined.
pressure to hire a woman. He thought about the

prospect with some anticipation. It had been weeks
since his last affair.

>

: and hoped she could convince him

S was hungry for the job
of her skills.

Æ he job required extensive teaching experience,
an impressive exhibition record, willingness to work
with colleagues, and numerous departmental duties.

... capable of the varied Da she measure up to the

responsibilities of a expectations?

full-time position.

CL

HA alliances with others the activism, the women’s caucus,

offered her support and inspired the poster collective, the reading

L Art of group, the writing, the family,
i aeher: work.
: the
child, the lover... ?
Education

Diane Pontius is a photographer, video artist, and teacher currently living in Philadelphia.

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several years ago I decided to go to New

and apply the laws. Pull in, push in, lifi

York to study dance professionally. After

up—the desired image is definitely

teaching at a university, I was looking for-

male, androgynous at best, but never fe-

ward to being in an environment that

male with curves and roundness, which

values learning with the body and study-

are considered “appropriate only for the

ing in a field where women have been

Middle Eastern belly dancer,” our teach-

visible and important, historically. At the

er tells us. Such a contrast to the way Rina

same time, I was terrified. To my mind,

Singha spoke of her training in Indian

I did not fit the typical image of'a dance

dance in the video “Women in Asian

student, and at the age of thirty I had

Dance.” “We worked on two pieces,

never studied dance full time. After con-

four hours a day for six months, repeatsidering several studios, I finally chose

ing them over and over again, sometimes

the Nikolais/Louis Dance Lab because of

with slight variations and recitation of the

their belief that given time, work, and

rhythmic patterns. In this way the piece

guidance, anybody can learn to dance. I

and its timing became a part of our

was also impressed by the continuity of

body.” She then demonstrated one of

the school’s teaching staff, which spans
three generations of dancers, including

Nos of our education. You have already

Hanya Holm who is in her nineties and

learned enough. Now you must learn to

one ofthe pioneers of modern dance in

give up, to make room. It takes courage,

America. The following are journal ex-

but there is no other way.”

cerpts about my experience in the studio and my research on the history of

There is much to learn from the body,

women in dance.

and not just dance either. The physicality of our selves is basic to everything

I had my first class with Hanya and was
totally taken by her. “Mostly fear and familiarity,” she said, “that’s what keeps us
from doing. First we must undo all the
— 78

her practice pieces; it could not have
been more than five minutes in all. How
I long to train in this way, slowly repeating what we need to know from the inside. Our training is done much too
quickly, and we are not allowed the time
to really sense the place of movement
in the body.

we do, yet it is one of'the most neglected
aspects of our upbringing and education,
which often serve to trap the reflexes
and cauterize the instincts. Bringing
those back to life is, as I’m finding out,

This learning is difficult and painful,
physically and psychologically, as I touch
habits deeply embedded in my muscles.
Yet I've come to be grateful for the pain,

an excruciating process, physically and
psychically.
Briefly I felt my whole body thinking—a
moment of vibration or alertness, not
just in the head but in the legs, the torso,
the arms. A sense of radiating outward
from inner movement. A glimmer that
blood, muscle, and bone are knowledgeable and sentient: consciousness in the
curves of muscles, the rushing of blood,
the exchange of fluids and air. Cellular
knowledge ..….

In some ways the approach to the body
is very male: analyze, analyze, analyze,

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even to watch for it, because it means

my body,” I said. “Do not let your mind

changes are underway and sensation is

dominate your body,” she replied. “The

being developed.

mind is there to clarify what the body
will do. Trust your body.”

The deeper I go into women and dance
the more I recognize myself, get glimpses

More and more I am seeing/sensing how

of what has been lost but is still alive in

deeply we as women internalize the fact

my instincts and in the living layer of my

that our bodies are not our own, how

body. Yesterday I was reading about Ka-

deeply the colonization goes. What do

buki theater, where women are prohib-

we need to free ourselves from the in-

ited from formal participation despite

side? What are the conditions for the

the fact that they created the Kabuki

freedom of the body? It is as if we had

dance form. Predictably, this form was

to recompose our most basic posture to

taken away from them by men, and they

find the point or source ofall other pos-

were outlawed from their own creation.

sibilities.

Yet a germ of their sensibility remains in
the integrity of the form, the wholeness

Looking at one of the young women

ofthe dances, which do not fall into ab-

today and thinking, Yes, that’s me ten

straction. Here in the geste I had a mo-

years ago if only ... I have to be careful

ment of recognition, a tugging in my

not to fall into bitterness or pity. I am

body saying, Yes, we passed here, as I

where I am and there is nothing to do

remembered what has fallen into silence,

about that except work harder. Clean-

can no longer be said but is still en-

ing out channels, bones, tendons, liga-

trusted to the body.

ments, socket joints, hinge joints. Refin-

ishing the antique lovingly. x
Today speaking with Hanya I told her I
am confused about the relation between

Rachel Vigier lives and works in New York City.
She is currently at work on a collection of essays m

mind and body. “My mind doesn’t know

about women, dance, and the body entitled Ges-

what to do with itself when I listen to

tures of Genius.

79 —,



á K A
ta
Ap

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JOAN HERBST SHAPIRO

his year I had the lucky experience of learn-

original compositions that refer to African and AfroAmerican cultures. Sometimes they combine diverse
elements, such as a contemporary rock song sungin

ing group Women of the Calabash.

the style of South African workers’ choirs. Their pre-

The shekere is a West African instrument that

sentation is a spectacular mix of percussive music,

comes from the Yoruba people of Nigeria. Used as a

vocals, movement, and dance.

powerful instrument to call spiritual forces, it is played
for religious ceremonies and occasions. The instru-

the audience to participate—“You'’re gonna clap your

ment is made from a hollowed-out gourd, or cala-

hands. You're going to sing and dance.” The liveli-

bash, which serves as a drum. Beads strung on a net

ness of the rhythms, with beautiful spacious melo-

encircling the gourd add a rattle sound:

dies spreading over all, is entrancing. Vocals complement percussive rhythms. Sometimes there is a dra-

DA dee DA dee DA dee, DA DA DA dee

matic rhythmic contrast between the first and sec-

DA dee DA dee DA dee, DA DA DA dee

ond parts of a song.

re

beat from the hollow interior of the calabash. The

that the musicians were members of'a class she taught

dee or che is a rattle sound created by the beads. The

called Egbe Omo Shekere (“Children of the Cala-

gourd is held semihorizontally between the player's

bash”). She said that the class met every Sunday in a

hands. As it is pushed by one hand and received by

West Village studio and that anyone could come. I

the other, the beads fly up and snap as they hit the

decided to go.

gourd. Che! The bass is sounded by either hand, hitting the calabash as it is thrust back and forth be-

cavernous Westbeth basement. I feel shy, yet I want

tween the player’s hands. Hearing the instrument

to connect to this music, so I join the circle of musi-

for the first time, I felt strongly drawn to its power

cians and stand up as part of the group. No one is

and energy.

more amazed than I. I am carried away. Clapping my
hands and stamping my feet I think that this music is
settings. Traditionally the instrument is used as

like ...yes, like pure affirmation. If ever I were seri-

backup in a group of drums. The original contribu— 80

ously sick, this music would heal me.

tion of Women ofthe Calabash is the use of'shekeres
played together as the featured instrument. In this

rapt. Introductions are informal, occurring after the

context one clearly hears both the rattle and bass

warm-ups that begin the class. We go around the

voices. At the time Women of the Calabash began

circle, calling out our first names. The attitude toward

playing, this was an untried idea. Its musical appeal

time and attendance is relaxed. Class is scheduled

can be measured by the fact that currently it has been
adopted by other musical groups.

from 11:30 A.M. to 1:00 P., but usually begins a little
late and runs on after 2:00. People come when they

nA
R

can and leave when they have to.
The music consists of complementary rhythmic

brates off the cement walls.

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N

vious learning experiences. When I ask Madeleine if
pressions as well as words, projecting enthusiasm or

the class is patterned on traditional African teaching

delight in the music, showing off skill, or miming

methods, she replies that she does not know. Essen-

sleepiness if the rhythm is flagging. She can be

tially she has developed her method of teaching in

clownish—imitating my overly serious expression

response to things she has found difficult in her own

until we break up laughing.

learning experiences. She says, “Most musicians have
endured a lot of put-down experiences, and they
teach that way.” In this class the flow of music is
never interrupted by criticism. No one is ever told
that they’re wrong. Someone just shows them something they can do while the music continues. There
is no testing, no putting people on the spot. Made-

her mother.

leine likes to create situations in which people can

The class is like a gift—the gift of a more life-

enjoy playing, whether it’s in the circle of the class
or at a low-key performance or through group participation in a parade.

Heresies 25

I8

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Classes are not sequential but rather an ongoing vious classroom experiences, in which students were
continuum in which beginners and experienced often pitted against one another. I found this class
players participate together. This permits people to both illuminating and healing—in contrast to “edugo at their own pace, to pick up as much as they can cational” experiences I’ve had elsewhere.

as fast or as slowly as they can. “When I first was learn- I believe that methods and systems of education
; _ ing,” Madeleine comments, “drummers would tell express the values of the people or cultures that creme, ‘Stand back and play the one.’ There’s so much ate them. The implicit value underlying most Ameri-

ego involved among musicians. It limits what they can education, it seems, is how to get ahead in the
are willing to show you.” She says that she is not material world in competition with everyone else
interested in students imitating her style but in giv- who is trying to get ahead. The spiritual basis of the
ing them a basic vocabulary of rhythms and patterns shekere class is unity, not competition. It is assumed

with which they can devise their own language. that when one joins the circle, he or she becomes
I strongly sense an intangible spiritual presence in part of the whole. Within that whole, each individ-

this class. While Yoruba tradition and spirituality ual is treated with deep respect, appreciation, and
aren't specifically discussed, they provide a founda- support. The class is founded on values of loving the

Kabuya P. Bowens The Final Call, 1989, gouache and m/m papers, triptych, each panel 12"x17". Photo: Glenn Saffo.
Presently working with the Studio in a School Association as an artist/instructor, Kabuya P. Bowen is also spending nine months as artist-in-residence at Longwood
(Bronx Council for the Arts). She is a native of Miami and has exhibited in both the New York and Miami areas.

tion for much of the music we play. music, having fun together, paying attention, develn The African model of music-making is commu- oping skills, and making a contribution. I would like
82 nal in its orientation. This differs from classical West- to see these values more prevalent in our society and
— ern tradition, which treats music as a highly special- learning situations.
s ized activity in which musicians and audience are Madeleine teaches because she really has somestrictly separated. As in African musical tradition, my

thing to give directly to people—she loves turning

shekere class is a social and participatory activity in

them on to the instrument. I go because I love the

which individual development is supported by the

music and want to connect to its power and energy.

group. IfI am doing well, I sense the appreciation of

It isn’t about getting ahead or competition or im-

the whole group. If I get lost, somêèone will smile proving one’s marketability or preparation for some-

from across the circle, catch my eye, and demon- thing. It’s about playing together. v
strate a rhythm I'can play. The first time this hap- si Joan Herbst Shapiro is an artist and environmental educator

: : : who lives in New York City. Her current work is concerned with

pened I was astonished. This experience of group healing our alienation from ourselves, one another, and the
support was strikingly different from most of my pre- natural/spiritual world.
The Art of

Education

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a sE [v4
AA

CAROL WOLFE KONEK

In 1987, during the three-week International Women’s Decade Forum and Con-

of several hundred people gathered
around them. Young men started asking

ference in Nairobi, several of us gathered

Dana questions about this ‘strange West-

at night to discuss all we had taken in

ern sexual practice. She told them she

throughout the day. We had listened to mi-

was a lesbian and talked about the emo-

grant women, refugee women, and women
in exile. We had listened to women out-

litical and cultural biases against the
preference. She was quite articulate. They

female circumcision. We talked late into

were fascinated.”

by revelations of atrocities that implicated
us all.

“And the police were there all this time?”

Billie asked.

sure nothing got out of control. And of
course they were also listening. At one

pened to Dana today. “Dame Nita Barrow

point they took several young men away.”

asked the women in the international les-

“Do you suppose the police detained

bian group to give up their booth. She said

forum, and no lesbian materials could be
handed out.”
“How can the conference censor anyone?” Billie asked.
“The women who were staffing the booth
didn't ask any questions. They just moved
their materials to the grassy square.”

Anna told us Dana had spoken for al- N
most five hours, that she was undaunted, D
that she was speaking from the heart of a
silence many women had occupied o
years. Dana became a liberator, a folk hero B

ping in to Dana's room to congratulate her.
My own thought was that she might now
be viewed as a threat.

“They were watching the crowd to make

One evening Anna came to the room
exclaiming, “You wor't believe what hap-

no lesbian issues would be debated at the

quired FBI files at the conference. |

tional basis for the preference and the po-

raged by sex tourism, bride-burning, and

the night, trying to resolve feelings evoked

City and later discovered that we had ac- 7

those men? Is is illegal to listen to such
discussions?” | asked, remembering my
friend Njinga’s story of his father's detention, the deplorable conditions in the jails,
and the impossibility of getting legal defense, whether guilty or innocent.

The next day I was attracted to a cluster
of animated people in the center of the Å
square, and | recognized the women from
the lesbian information booth. A young man N
politely inquired if he could ask me a ques- Viv.4

tion. | responded that he could. DO
“If you please, would you mind explain- | / SY

of life?” O

ing to me and ny friends this lesbian way S0%

I was charmed by the man's curious, Wy

courteous diction and realized that the de- WWZ%

Anna thumbed through Sisterhood /s
Global until she found the laws on homo-

fensiveness and hostility that might infuse W V

sexuality in the Kenyan chapter: “It is ille-

such a question posed by a Western man n

gal under the Penal Code (Sec. 162) to have

were absent in this man's demeanor. “I don't W

in the program. I wasn't surprised that the

carnal knowledge of any person against the

planners were worried about the response

order of nature and is punishable by four-

mind discussing this with you. What would A
you like to know?” By now there were fifteen N i

No lesbian workshops had been listed

j . | :

of the Kenyan government to this topic,

teen years imprisonment. The law does

considering the missionary influence on

not specifically mention lesbianism.” ..….

S : N E TNE SONSS a T SE S Be SA Eaa VERAZ T

v education. It had become increasingly apA| parent that every government had a vested
N interest in perpetuating its own form of female subordination and that the preservation of silence was essential to this
l purpose. “So what happened?” I asked.

“Anna, you must tell Dana to be careful,” I said, realizing as | spoke how cautious and conventional | sounded. But |
vividly recalled the Mexico City conference
in 1975 and ny first realization that many
governments see the women’s movement

d “Did the women object to their treatment?”

as a threat to nationalism. My companion

N “No. They sat passively on the ground

and | were certain we were being followed

group. |

or twenty young people, mostly men, but l N
also a few women, on the outskirts of the Y

“How is it that lesbians can make love?” ##(N
“They can make love as any two people || )

can make love.” v p

Several of the young men stifled their IVÆØS

laughter. “Oh, no, they can't,” said the L
leader.

I plunged ahead, determined to be gen- J
tle. “Making love is possible between any B

SSS

2 9 SN AN

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Alex Stavitsky Dominican Republic, June 1989, photograph.

~~

A

Alex Stavitsky Dominican Republic, June 1989, photograph.
/

ノレ Currently a photo asdistant, Alex Stavitsky wants to ude photography to cha llenge preconceived idead of femininity, politice, people, and their varioud cultured.
] She wad in Nicaragua for the 1990 electiond.

る WA

いく Sd, MN

0> 4OE( ANN
/



PAS

> VE

BN

Y KS UN SN WY

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y/

トト

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SVE
p believe that penetration is the most imporPIN tant part of the sex act.” I paused , hoping

they understood. There were several nods.
Y “But penetration is not always the most important or pleasing part of lovemaking for a

behind me seemed to be moving closer.
woman must be reacting to something.
“In our country there is often disrespect
between men and women. Daughters often
learn to fear their fathers and then also find

“You would ignore the matter of sin?”
asked the second man, speaking somewhat more aggressively than before.
“I am saying that love between two

j woman. In our culture there are many

they cannot depend on the respect of other

f Women who believe men äre too interested

men. Men in our culture sometimes make

l in penetration. Lovemaking goes too fast for

disgusting remarks to women in public

pounding of my pulse and of my anger at

| A the woman when the man is thinking only

places. We have music and movies that

the indoctrination of these men who had

1 of reaching his goal.” I paused again. “Is it
the same in your culture?”
“But without that, there is nothing,”
), added another man.
“A man's point of view may be different,

but think of making love from a woman's
point of view. Women like to be embraced.
They like to be held and caressed and to
feel that they are precious to the one who
loves them.”

“Yes, we know.”

“They like to speak and to be understood.
Some women tell me they are conquered,
; like territory—taken, without regard for their

feelings or their response.”
i| A man who had been silent spoke softly.
N “Yes I have heard women say so.”
! “While we are talking like this, there is

equate sex and violence, and there are men
who rape, brutalize, and sometimes kill
women. No woman in our culture is safe
from this violence.”
“In our culture some of these things are
happening, too.”
“I understand from talking to women at
this conference, | continued, that until recently a man had the right to beat his wife,

and that laws against wife-beating are not
always enforced, even now.”
Agreement from my listeners. “It is the

women cannot be a sin, that only violence K
can be a sin,” | concluded, aware of the

seemed so sweet and polite until I reached || a

the bedrock of their belief. V
When I met Billie and Anna in the Peace V
Tent at the end of the day, I confessed | A
now understood how Dana was compelled IW
to answer the questions of the Kenyans and N
that I too had become their instructor.
Anna hoped I hadn't gotten myself in V
trouble and began telling me about Dana's
experience that day. As Dana read announcements in the bulletin area, a woman
spoke to her. Never taking her eyes from

same in my country. We are a long way from

the board, the woman said “Do not look at

arriving at understanding between men and

or appear to talk to me. I heard your talk in

women. We are looking for ways to stop the

the public square. I know young women

violence and create understanding. Perhaps

who need your message, and yet there is

someday men will listen to women and try

no information in my country. If you could

to understand what they think, how they

send books and articles to this address, you

H something else I would like to discuss with

feel, and what they want.”

could save lives.” She tacked a note to the

v you,” I added, searching for tact. “In my
country women are often abused by men.

life-styles?” came the question.

WAN

I V

si Sometimes fathers do not value their daughters. Men beat their wives, and also their
children.”

“And then there will be no more lesbian

“No, no. There will still be lesbian life-

bulletin board and continued speaking. |
am a teacher in a school for girls. From
time to time close relationships develop

styles. When women are no longer territory

between the girls, perhaps love relationships

to be conquered or property to be owned,

...and the girls have no way of learning that

they will be free to love whomever they

their experience is not unique. Several times

please. Women will then be free to choose

there have been suicides, double suicides
more than once. It is very tragic. If I could

ence, | fear this is a problem everywhere.

choose, they will no longer be offended by

You ask me what lesbians do. What two

this choice.”

women do, | am told, for I am not a lesbian,

is to love each other with tenderness and
W concern for the pleasure of each other"
Ý “And this trouble between men and
i women ...you think it makes women prefer
N making love with other women?"

“What about religious and moral laws
which must be obeyed?” asked my first
questioner. | realized | was confronting a
very polite wall.

tell them there are books to read, books by
women who choose love, perhaps some of A

these girls could be saved” e
Anna and | wondered if there was a way

to send the books, if the woman receiving
them would be endangered. We knew there p

“Most religions teach the principles of
love and respect, and yet many marriages

was
censorship
andschool
felt that
a package
v
mailed
from one
to another
might
be opened by the authorities.

BI “No. Not necessarily. Women who love

are based on contempt and abuse. Moral-

d women are not rejecting men. They are lov-

ity would require that people are never re-

ing women because they find women beau-

quired to submit to intimacy with someone

H tiful and loving and interesting.”

who does not love and respect them.” Only

hollow in response. She said she was just J

now did I become uneasy that the guard

waiting to go home. Something was very,

B “But you think women are afraid of men?”

The next day I met Dana in the hall; |
asked for the latest news, but her voice was J

AZIZA

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very wrong. What had happened to this in-

with the freedom | felt in the square. With

does heroism reside? Heroic actions tran-

spiring, patient woman?

all those people around me, listening, | felt

scend despair, but the person who herself

“Saturday night, a block from here, I was

that the world was becoming a place where

is heroic doesn't always experience it that

mugged. A man grabbed me from behind,

everything could be spoken aloud. | felt so

way. Dana went home feeling defeated, but

twisted my arm behind me, and asked for

accepted for who I was. So loved by all the

her courage had an enduring effect on other

my money. | took it out of my pocket and

people who gathered around me. Then the

gave it to him. When he saw it was only

mugging. It was as though it was deliber-

twenty shillings, he was furious. He jerked

ate. As though I were being—”

my arm behind me, and as | looked over

“— punished for speaking?”

my shoulder, I saw a knife. Then he punched

“Yes, Silenced.”

me in the stomach.”
“Why didn't you tell us?”

“All the usual reasons. I had so many
feelings. I felt stupid. Responsible. You know
the list. | couldn't fight. It was as though |

I tried to convince Dana that it was most
likely random violence, not retaliation.
“But I feel diminished. It ruined my
courage.”

people, and I wanted to make something
of her experience that she may be unable
to.

There is also a beautiful political parable
in what occurred. We need to be aware of
the abuse we experience at the hands of
our sisters, the oppression we ourselves create for women. The action of the conference's conveners—excising all lesbian

“Your courage touched all those who

information from the official forum— served

| were a little girl again. As though | were a

heard you. Think how you changed lives

only to create a more powerful platform for

helpless three-year-old rather than who |

by speaking to them in their silence.”

the ideas and more motivation for lesbian

really am. /’m a marathon runner. I'm

Dana managed to say she would try to

spokespersons to rise to the challenge. In

an athlete. And ! let him hit me. | stood

hold on to that thought and that she hoped

trying to silence them, Dame Barrow suc-

there obediently and let him have my

the passage of years would make it easier

money.”

to focus on that aspect of the conference.

“You felt you should have fought back,

Has it? Victims of violence—whether eco-

and that since you didn't, you were

nomic, physical, or academic violence—

responsible?”

recover at different rates, though it has been

ceeded in giving them a greater voice. ¥

Carol Wolfe Konek is an associate dean and faculty member in the Center for Women’s Studies
at Wichita State University. She writes about the
international women’s movement, the women’s

/

peace movement, and women recovering from

"Maybe. And maybe this comes together

chemical dependencies

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Ai A,

l am incarcerated in a women's prison in

$

mon trend in all of the prison systems in

inhabit internal Diso will continue to

the United States, except for a very few

suffer unnecessarily. For a society that

which have not been seriously affected by

the need for AIDS education in the prison
system in order to bring an end to the cruel

The court systems generally uphold the

treatment of people with AIDS is a poor

D.O.C’s measures because of the antici-

showing of sincerity.

and barbaric treatment of those individuals

pated political outcry of a society that is

living in prisons who suffer from this deadly

equally uneducated about the facts of

disease.

the virus.

Instead of educating inmates and admin-

professes to be humane and interested in
the welfare of its citizens, the government's

New Jersey. I wish to bring to your attention

The author of this letter must remain anonymous
because the system referred to above has taken
drastic measures to stop all outside communication dealing with the subject of AIDS. This in-

At this writing there is just one female

istrators and staff about the facts of AIDS,

inmate confined to a Special Medical Unit

prisons allow rumors to be the only source

in the only female institution in the State of

of information. This hinders the treatment

New Jersey (this inmate is referred to as

of the inmates who suffer from AIDS and

Jane Doe in one specific case). However,

consequently increases the fear of prison-

in 1988 alone there were two deaths that

ers and staff. For example, upon entering

occurred as a result of the lack of proper

this women's institution, an inmate receives

medical treatment. These women were se-

one pamphlet that is highly outdated and

riously ill but were denied the “special medi-

contains obsolete information. At some time

cal treatment” that is reserved for “Jane

during an inmate's stay-at the institution a

Doe”—a woman who has been in complete

film is shown. This film does not include

remission from a bout with PCP in June

any medical information. It is a film made

1987. Both women who died were con-

by dying inmates in New York State's prison

firmed'to have been carrying the AIDS virus.

cludes the 24-hour lockdown for over a month of
the author herself for actively advocating exposure
of the system's treatment of AIDS inmates. The
author dedicates this letter to J.R., for her unbe-

lievable strength, courage, and determination,
which is her motivation to continue this fight.

Dear Folks
I'm buying my mother a subscription to
Heresies because she is somewhat clueless about the topics that your magazine
discusses. Please send her a little “gift
card” if you have them ...…. l'Il put it under

system, and in it the inmates make a final

It is a proven medical fact that isolation

plea to others not to follow in their footsteps.

from all social contact, whether verbal,

Unfortunately, by the time an individual is

physical or visual, is detrimental to the im-

incarcerated it is too late to reconsider and

mune system of a human being. Medical

avoid behaviors that have already taken

fact also supports the notion that AIDS is

place.

not easily transmittable, and is a behavior-

Despite proven medical facts, the State

ally responsible virus. Despite these facts,

of New Jersey's Department of Corrections

our society continues to support the theory

chooses to institute primitive methods of

that it is safer to confine those who suffer

treatment of AIDS inmates. While a diag-

from AIDS in a “leper colony” setting. There

the tree or something. Maybe she'll stop
ironing my dad's shirts.
I read and use Heresies extensively. |
have been researching the gender gap that
exists in the artworld and Heresies has lent
me some unique insights. Keep it up, etc.
As far as I know, I'm the only male that
reads your magazine (at my school at least).
But I also read military reports and NCO

87 —

Magazine to keep informed on all sides.
Cheers,

nosis of “full-blown AIDS” is in no way a

is a reason that people are frightened, and

diagnosis of increased infectiousness, the

that is because of our government's atti-

C.C.—Hamilton, New York

< -3

D.O.C. isolates prisoners suffering from full-

tude in perpetuating crisis-level educational

blown AIDS from the remaining population.

programming, not only within the correc-

In addition, prisoners are denied access to

tional system but in society in general. With-

legal rights as afforded to them through the

out support from the public and without

issue offered some intriguing questions

8th and 14th Amendments to the United

education, thousands of inmates —as well

about women and higher education, and |

States Constitution. This seems to be a com-

as free men and women with AIDS who

wanted to share some of my experiences.

Poli Sci in '65
Your flyer about the upcoming education

Heresies 25

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At thirty | was a political science major,
attending a university that was part of the

me, and kissed me—not passionately or
romantically, but hard. I| immediately got the

California state college system. It was the

message about what | was expected to do

1965—66 term, and | was to graduate in

to get my grade changed upward.

1966, after having completed my first two

Well, two can play the game. |I let him

years at a junior college. I had been a high

kiss me, and when he got to the point of

school dropout, had two children and a

wanting to go to a more private setting, |

husband, did all the housework, and

told him I couldn't that day, as I had a hus-

had to commute thirty miles one way to

band who would wonder where | was. He

school.

suggested we “make an appointment,”

There were only three political science
professors, as the school was newly

which we did. The next day | went to my
only female political science professor at the

opened—lI was in the first (four-year) grad-

university and told her the story. She said

uating class. The “leading male” prof was

she knew a way to fix it. She called him on

aloof and rarely allowed me to speak, but

the phone, told him she was my adviser,

being older I had the guts to speak up any-

that | was graduating in a month, and that

way. Word soon got to me from other stu-

she had to know my grade in advance of

dents that he couldn't understand why a

receiving the transcript. He told her | had

married woman was going to college: What

an A. Later in the day he called me at home,

would she do when she got out?

and | had the great pleasure of saying

No mentors at that place, | can tell you!
Of course, l-wouldn't have known a mentor

“Sucker,” and hanging up. In spite of her
having helped me in this situation, my “sav-

if I saw one. But my college days were one

ior” apparently never did anything for any

of the factors that later led me to become a

of the other women students, nor did she

raging feminist.
In my last semester | was short of money
for books and fees and tried to borrow from

the college emergency fund. As a married
woman, | was refused a loan. I cashed in
one of my children’s and my own life insur-

ance policies to get $250.

SEXUAL HARASSMENT

While attending university, | decided to
make up some work I had started in 1964
at another state school. I contacted my former professor, who said I could make up
the work by writing a paper. I did so, and
he sent me a grade lower than | thought |
deserved. When | called to complain, he

become involved in the women's movement
as far as I know.

GRADUATION

It’s possible I was the top student among
the political science majors, but my unseasoned new school decided to have only one
graduating classification— “with honors” —
for people with averages of 3.0 and above. |
had a 3.5 average, completing four years in
three with two semesters off in between, so
I couldn't be faulted for not being a serious
student. In my last semester | carried twenty-

one units while doing dishes, laundry, kids’
homework, and dealing with a husband,
since replaced, who was suddenly threatened by my impending graduation.

asked me to see him in his office, but after

One fellow student (male) whose average
arriving there he suggested we talk over cof-

fee at the cafeteria. Everything seemed nor-

was under three points was “liked” by the
department, so they created the classifica-

mal until we got to the cafeteria and he pro-

posed that we have a drink instead. Well, |

tion “With Distinction” for him and arranged

his entry into the master’s program at a

was thirty years old and had had drinks with

men before, including other professors, so
without thinking much about it, | agreed.
We went to a nearby bar and ordered.
All of a sudden he turned to me, grabbed

major university.

In sisterhood,
Barbara A. St. John
Editor, Teaching Equity

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89 —

Heresies 25

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am trying to be a mediøAl student. Or—lI am

that his excruciating leg pain has stopped.

medical student. Who is this I, and what is this
role? I hide in the bathroom sometimes, for pri-

The rest of the week, as | learned to diagnose ear

MARTHA REED HERBERT

infections and sore throats, the usual ailments of children, I watched Martin's impact on the community of

vacy, or perhaps to cry. | weep, feeling like a

doctors in the hospital. Everyone knew his story and

soldier in the medical army, a cipher in my little
white coat with my toy doctor tools in my pockets,

felt chastened; a doctor two weeks previously hadn't

pretending competence. Only rarely, and barely, does

even noticed the mass on his back. What a frighten-

the gaze of my superiors discern any qualities l've

ing oversight! Our future patients with back pain will

come to treasure over nearly four decades as my self.

bring Martin to mind, and remind us never to treat

l am to learn the skills and the telegraphic communi-

complaints as merely routine.
I work in an enormous tertiary care medical center,

cation style of the doctor's world. What relevance is
my self—my insights, my associations—to this task?

with esteemed experts and the highest technology.
Outside, the park benches across the street are part

Just as an airline pilot speaking over a scratchy radio
would inject dangerous ambiguity by broadcasting

of the neighborhood's housing stock. And the drug

metaphors about clouds, I as a doctor must be pre-

trade in the neighborhood may be as big a business
as the hospital. A rumor among local pregnant teen-

cise and concise, or someone might die.

agers that crack eases labor pains influences even

Martin, a ten-year-old boy, was the first patient |
saw in pediatrics. I had looked forward to this rota-

the nonusers to come in high for delivery. If a urine
toxicology screen reveals crack, they take the baby

tion because | love children. Peter Pan's “I won't grow
up” is one of my theme songs. Kids aren't yet fully

In a small

Their world is play and imagination. Martin's parents

community where
people live
together their

first exam by the intern found nothing wrong, except
for a large and painless swelling by his lower spine

whole lives,

to myself, I now often pathetically serve as translator.
But why are these Native American and African-look-

is no way to

to examine the boy and then whispered in small clusters in the hall. I kept the family company as best

can't even talk with them, since so many speak no
English. Because | managed to teach some Spanish

generations, there

truth. The examining room became a crossroads of
specialists from all over the hospital who descended

taught Spanish; as a result, after all the rhetoric about
how we should relate humanely to our patients, we

and for many

saw that none of Martin's pain could be explained by
trauma, our eyes met to honor the awful emerging

ber that much raw information. But with all the
school’s zeal to prepare us for our work, we weren't

that looked as if a whale were coming up for air. |
helped the neurologist do the second exam. As we

schools recently told my school to cut down their curriculum by 25 percent because no one can remem-

now his legs were hurting, too. Young boys love horseplay even more than | do, I thought to myself. The

no crack rehab programs.
The national accreditation association for medical

told us his back had been hurting since someone had
kicked him a few months ago in the playground, and

away, and the only way the mother can get her baby
back is to get in a crack rehab program. But there are

suckered, bribed, and beaten into believing bullshit.

ing people speaking Spanish?
On weekends I've been reading about genocide.

pretend that the

Mick Taussig's Shamanism, Colonialism and the Wild
Man talks about the holocaust inflicted by the Putu-

I could.

Martin was admitted a few hours later, and was soon

misfortune of one
leaves the others

pled him for life in just a few more days. Not that he's
likely to live for more than another year; his cancer is
wildly disseminated. Even though he hasn't been told
his prognosis, he does know that he can walk, and

mayo rubber profiteers on the Indians. Unspeakable
brutality and the murder of millions, rationalized by

rushed to emergency neurosurgery to free his spine
from the pressure of a tumor that would have crip-

projections of the white man's own barbarism onto
the victims. Yet while the whites despised the Indi-

unaffected.

ans, they still turned to them for their healing, because strangely it seemed to work.
Does my brand of healing work? How many times
The Art of

Education

=90

|

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Lynne Cohen

have I turned my clinical gaze upon some Hispanic

The white man brought not just new kinds of germs

mother with her stuffed-nosed child and repeated the

to sicken bodies, but a plague to kill cultures. In a

incantation of my attending physician: “Your child

small community where people live together their

has a viral illness. Don't worry about it; come back in

whole lives, and for many generations, there is no

a few days if it doesn't get better, or right away if the

way to pretend that the misfortune of one leaves

fever gets very high.” And the mother meekly accepts

the others unaffected. So where, then, is the boun-

my pronouncement and goes to the desk to fill out
the Medicaid paperwork.

dary between reweaving the social web and restoring
the body's integrity? And where do we want the boun-

By what authority do I deem the child to be stricken
with an innocuous virus? As one of the more forthright attending physicians confided in me, “When we
tell them this, we're really just blowing hot air out of

dary to be?

What is a viral illness, anyway? Native healing systems didn't have the category of viral illness. Does
that prove they were merely hocus-pocus? Is it simply

our mouths. If we wanted to prove it, we'd have to run

that Western medicine is more thorough and scienti-

viral cultures, and they take too long and are too ex-

fic? Then why is the molecular biology of viruses so

pensive anyway. And even then there's usually no
treatment.”

abstracted from the social context of contagion? And
why is the body reduced to a set of physical func-

Why has this mother been reduced to turning to

tions? How do I tell my patients that their illnesses

the likes of me—indeed, the likes of any of us—for

are equally caused by exploitation, uprootedness, and

her medical advice? I am told that native medicines
used to work a lot better before the white man cam2.

violencę? And why are we reduced to me, the budding professional, having to tell them? How did they

Heresies 25
L6

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gain what we professionals call ignorance?

back into the socia/ body. And even this social body is
too often mechanical.

hile Europeans were destroying native cultures abroad, they were burning the bearers of their own cultures’ folk knowledge at

In my preclinical psychiatry course, we interviewed
a nun from a conservative church who was hospitalized for depression. She told us she had been work-

the stake. Women and native peoples were

ing in a mission in South America, and went into crisis

hunted, degraded, and killed to make way

because she had never imagined such poverty. When

for mechanistic thinking and the rule of the market.

she questioned why God would allow such misery, she

And expansionism and pursuit of profit seemed to be

was told by her superiors that such thoughts were

fueled by a visceral horror of sensuality and rooted-

sinful. The psychiatrist teaching us made sure we

ness. Nature and natives, women and witches were

asked all the standard biopsychiatric questions about

seen as unruly and disorderly, needing to be subdued

depression: ‘Have you been having trouble sleeping?

and controlled. Science vehemently excluded unmea-

Has your appetite changed? Are you tired? Do you

surable sense perception, and any knowledge not

feel low self-esteem? Are you having trouble concen-

mathematizable was strictly second class. | learn this

trating? Are you finding it hard to make decisions? Do

too in my medical training, as they transform me from

you have feelings of hopelessness?” I was the only

a they into a we. “We're only interested in the facts,”

one in the room who asked her about South America

I was told recently when | gave an interpretation dur-

and her church. When | asked her if she'd ever heard

ing rounds. But what is a fact? A fact is something

of Liberation Theology, the teacher cut me off. That

that someone is around to measure and document.

night I complained bitterly to a radical psychiatrist

That means that most things that happen don't get

friend, expressing my horror that a coherent woman

to be facts.

would be incarcerated in a mental ward and kept from

So what things are fact enough to earn entry into
the medical record? Diagnosis: malignant mechanis-

learning about the context of her crisis. “Martha,”
my friend said to me, ‘stay horrified.”

tic market economy in Europe; leading to robbery,
genocide, and destruction of native lands; followed

have recently crossed a threshold, moving from

by violent uprooting; then chronic racism and exploi-

seeing the hospital as an alien and inhospitable

tation, with poor heating, poor nutrition, and over-

culture to dreaming about it every night and

crowding, providing a grand welcome for pathogens.

finding it intriguing. This is good, because it’s

If I could write that in the chart, it would no longer be
enough to give the medicines and advise the bed rest

hard to learn without falling in love, or at least
having a little fling. But it is also dangerous. | am feel-

that many in truth cannot afford to take. But only in

ing the seductive power now of the medical team, and

scattered progressive pockets do practitioners of so-

of the hospital world. l’d barely even imagined such a

cial medicine even attempt to move beyond seeing

complex community of cooperation. The medical cen-

illness as an individual's problem to putting the virus

ter where | work and study employs about forty thou-

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sand people. I do not know very much about the

Mouths move much faster than faces or gestures can

functioning of the whole: it overwhelms me. | barely

keep pace. Eyes only track horizontally, or perhaps down

know the parts of it where | am starting to participate. |

to a page, but they do sometimes smile.

can hardly conceive how to bridge the gap between

What do such eyes not see? Of what does such knowl-

calculating body fluid management and giving com-

edge remain ignorant? I| sometimes wonder whether

passion and comfort.

my very thoughtfulness and tenderness betray the trust

Only recently, while helping a physical examiner more

of my patients. If I put them off guard, if | allay their

skilled than I am, did I glimpse that sensitively palpat-

suspicions, into what have | seduced them? One day in

ing someone's abdomen for masses, or thoughtfully dis-

pediatrics, we rounded on the cardiology ward to see

cerning unusual heart sounds, could be a way of

the “interesting findings.” A two-year-old girl, born with

expressing love. The act of putting a stethoscope on

a gross heart malformation, had been given a heart

someone's body could be done with both tenderness

transplant. Already back from death several times, she

and utmost respect. I saw the reverence with which

is kept on an immunosuppressive drug that has grown

one could bear—not merely witness, but know/edgeable

black hair all over her arms and legs, and sideburns on

witness to another's physical being. And some of my

her face. Her immune system is kept from rejecting

physician preceptors have even taught me in this way.

the alien heart, but it will also fail to fight infection or

I treasure my times with my patients, for both the

cancer, of which she will probably die. As I approached

leisure of slow thoroughness | am granted as a stu-

her chest with my stethoscope, probably the fifteenth

dent, and for the ease and grace of conversation with

person to do so in as many minutes, she raised up her

regular people. It's easier for me to be they than we,

leg and fiercely kicked my hand away. I backed off.

even in my white coat, which reminds us who is who in

She'd made herself as clear as she could, I thought,

the hospital. But these intervals punctuate a day spent

without knowing how to talk. The next student, though,

in a different time warp. In the amount of time it takes
me to keep track of my three patients, my interns keep

was undaunted and placed his stethoscope on her

How do I tell my

track of a whole floor and my senior residents keep
track of the whole hospital. Moments of pride I've felt

patients that their

in grasping my patient's case have felt smaller beside
the doings of these others, who already know my pa-

exploitation,

told them she would have a longer life? Did they tell
her how new the procedure is and how risky the drugs?

and violence?

have? Did the surgeons ask the parents to consecrate

Did they discuss what kind of a life their child would

can help to think about a single patient.
Perhaps there is a different kind of grace operating

their daughter to the advancement of medical science? |

And why are we

here: the virtuosity of coordinating complicated information. Like a foreigner who can finally understand

guage that | still can barely speak. And the language is

the budding

“Have you ever listened to your heartbeat?” He said

professional,

tened. He looked very interested. How many doctors

no. She put her stethoscope in his ears, and he lis-

deviation from its unstated normal range opens out to

had seen him, in the half of his life that he’s spent in

having to tell

skiing a steep, fast slope where the trees don't matter
much unless they're in the way. Yet it still seems odd to

Another patient, eight years old, had a very loud heart
murmur that we all went to hear. My friend asked him,

full of numbers, spit out rapidly, where the order re-

a universe of pathophysiological significance. It’s like

wonder if the parents are too numb by now to see their
own daughter's rage.

reduced to me,

enough words to hear sentences, | am learning a lan-

veals the identity of each, and where a single figure's

formed from a dead duck to a live guinea pig? Had they

uprootedness,

choose which patients to send for tests. | am still
amazed at case conferences to see how many people

What had the surgeons told her parents? How had
they persuaded them to allow their daughter to be trans-

tem. | do not page the neurologist or endocrinologist
for a consult on my own initiative. I do not (or not much)

gled some trinkets above the girl's face. ‘Look at the
pretty toys," he said.

equally caused by

sometimes medically important. But I do not yet have
authority or knowledge to bring to bear the larger sys-

sion on her face. An even clearer message, but this
time unheeded. Finishing his exam, the student dan-

illnesses are

tient’s whole story and much more. True, my greater
intimacy lets me uncover, or recall, details which are

chest. The girl furiously kicked her arms and legs, and
shook her head from side to side with a rageful expres-

the hospital, without thinking to offer him their
stethoscopes?

them?

I teach my patients what I'm doing whenever | can,

me how little “affect,” as doctors call it , is expressed

whenever they show the slightest interest. Before | went

in this communication. Even the humor is deadpan.

to medical school, I taught biology and basic science

Heresies 25

— E€6

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Joni Sternbach Untitled, 1989, photograph.

to working-class adults. While teaching I saw the most

her aunt. Having escaped from that dire fate myself, |

poignant desire to learn, matched of course by the pau-

wanted to save her, too. | lavished praise on her

city or resources society assigns to such low-priority

intelligence—to her mother (in Spanish), to the attend-

human beings: no labs or equipment, no libraries, and

ing physicians, to anyone who could mirror it back to

me as a teacher, self-taught in science with my art and

her. And I gave her my instruments, and let her exam-

humanities degrees. Yet | taught them better than |

ine me. She looked into my eyes with my ophthalmo-

was later taught in school myself. I nurtured then—and

scope and saw the delicate red blood vessels spidering

still nurture—a vision of a people's reappropriation of

their way along the yellow retina toward the optic nerve

science. And | truly believe you can seduce anyone if

—and she even saw them pulsing with the heartbeat.

you figure out how to tickle their curiosity. Play and

She saw my eardrum, with the tiny sound-conducting

intrigue can melt hard armor, and they are the way

bones behind it, and the opalescent way it reflects the

back, I think, to connected creativity, to thinking for

light. She looked inside my nose and peered up into

ourselves and together about how to live on this earth.

the tall, dark, and narrow nasal cavern with its sheer,

l am daunted now, inside the belly of the monster, by

steep, curving pink walls. She listened to my heart and

the enormous effort and reevaluation this vision de-

her mother’s and her brother's and her own. | taught

mands. Maybe | should stick with the play and com-

her how to measure blood pressure. | told her that

passion, and forget the knowledge and skill. But it’s

there's nothing worse than being deadly bored, and that

too late for that; curiosity has me hooked.

she shouldn't let anyone stop her from dreaming big
dreams. “Go to college,” I said, “You'll thrive on the

ne day, when the clinic was slow, an eight-

challenge, and it will be fun.” And I hope I gave her

year-old girl came in with her sick little

something to remember. With the choices I saw her

brother. While she bubbled over with ques-

facing, I didn't stop to discuss what she might forget.

tions about every little thing I did, she told me
how she could never go to college because it
would be too hard—she wanted to be a secretary like

Martha R. Herbert is a teacher, writer, medical student, and
unrepentant materialist utopian.

The Art of

efori ejg

—- 94

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NOTICE
This is to inform our readers that the “Women on Men” issue is being delayed
as a result of our former office manager having removed without permission
more than $12,000 from the Heresies corporation account (monies that were
a combination of state and federal grants awarded for the publication of
the “Women on Men” issue). In addition, at that time she also collected and
removed all the materials for the “Women on Men” issue. To date she has
refused to return either the funds or the materials to us. Heresies Collective,
Inc. has been in litigation with her and her husband, who was also a
signatory on the account into which the funds were originally placed, but
to date we have been unable to settle.
An injunction was obtained by our lawyers against the defendants in the case
entitled Heresies v. Kenny and Alexander, which is pending in the New York
County Supreme Court. We expect to go to trial before the end of this year
to resolve this matter. Further information can be obtained from our attorneys,
Alterman & Boop, P.C., 349 Broadway, New York, NY 10013, Tel. 212-226-2800.

CAREL MOISEIWITSCH

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' b674 đ

MADHOUSE MADHOUSE KATE MILLETT
In 1972 through misguided family intervention I was caught and held in a California madhouse.
And again in 1980, this time in Ireland where my sympathy with the hunger strikers and my ‘record’
made it possible for the police to commit me indefinitely to a back ward asylum in County Clare.

Kate Millett is a

New York sculptor
and writer. She has

been sculpting in ,
mixed media for f
30 years.

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Sio

FEER SEIRENA
:
: ASEE AoA

Claire Moore The Secret, artist's book, ca. 1987.

Claire Moore 1912—1988
The Secret was one of Claire Moore’s last hand-editioned books. A painter, writer, and teacher, Claire mimeographed her drawings and visual stories in book form before today’s copy machines were in broad use. Many of her
books are in the Museum of Modern Art library and the Franklin Furnace Archive.

Claire studied in New York with Werner Drewes and Fernand Leger and worked alongside Jackson Pollock in the mural painting workshop of
David Siquieros. She married, painted, and studied with David Park in California before returning to New York to raise her daughter, Nellie, as a
single parent. The figure and words about space and human anxieties, placed in a setting of outer space, were the subject of Claire's paintings of
the last years. A mentor to many artists, writers, and poets, Claire was optimistic about the future. She died in August 1988 before the openings of
a show of paintings at June Kelly Gallery and a show of works on paper at Susan Teller Gallery.

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0 ۱

0 Ole AOA
“OCR ‫ و‬3

` ISSN 0146-3411
$6.75

‫ارا ا تلا للا‬

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2 Te

o TT
r

‫ا‬

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I JUST WORKED,.

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I SUPPOSE MY WORK WAS ROOTED
IN THE WORK OF ARTISTS WHO CAME

H

J

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Í S
TO THOSE WHO RESPOND,
A WORK OF ART IS THE VISUAL,

VERRAL, AURAL EVIDENCE OF
A SINGULAR IDENTITY.

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SECRET
CF ART
IS THAT
IT IS 80
SIMPLE,
TO STATE

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ТНЕ ЅЕСВЕТ ВЕІОМСОЗ
ТО БУЕВҮОМЕ,

– МНІСН 1$ ЮНҮ
І ҒЕЕІ
ЕМВАНВАЅЅЕ)
ТВҮІМІ ТО
ЕХРІАТМ АВТ.

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IT IS ALWAYS
THE SAME SECRET,
REVEALED AT

DIFFERENT TIMES
AND PLACES IN
DIFFERENT WAYS.

ART IS THE PRIKAL SECRET THAT

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The nd

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A A = RR ESSERE

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